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Wednesday, March 30, 2011

MY PERSONAL DIARY OF 2003



1 January (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:00 into a New Year. Morning pulled water from our well. Scanned the two dailies. Went to Adduroad by 9:00. Morning I did not take my first class to the students of second year Intermediate because they went to greet the doctor, the founder of this college, on the occasion of New Year. I went to the class of first year Intermediate students and spent talking with them. Very few like to be taught today. I am going to leave these students very soon. I am touched to foresee this event. It is a good experience to be in the company of pupils with their mischief and ignorance. Afternoon explained some points of English grammar to my cousin Vasu and his classmate at my friend’s hotel. Night listened to Telugu cine songs on tape recorder. My intention is to get a well-paid job and settle down in my life. It is expected that marriage pressure hovers around me this year. I want to enter a challenging career this year. Self-confidence, fortitude and dynamism will be my guiding virtues in this year. I think solitude and lovesickness haunt me this year also. May God bless me. Went to sleep by 11:00.

2 January (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning scanned the two dailies. Went to Adduroad by 9:00. Spent some time at my friend’s hotel. Took my class to second year Intermediate by 9:50. Taught them paragraph writing for half an hour. Then spent chatting with them. They have their half-yearly exams from the 4th of this month. They are not yet taught their non-detailed text. I did not venture into it because it is too clumsy to deal with. I told them to depend on guides. Many say that students should not be allowed to follow guides. They can’t help doing so when they are not good at English and their lecturers are equally cheating themselves following guides in many cases. Took my class to the first year Intermediate by 11:40. Today I read out one of my personal creative writings to them. They liked it. They asked me which film actress I consider beautiful. My list included Manisha Koirala, Preeti Jhangiyani, Devayani, Priya Gill and Sumalatha. I hate the unethical lives of these film folks behind the screen. The present films portray skin show and vulgar dialogues. Afternoon spent with my uncle Srinu. Today it was very cold and cloudy. I enjoyed it a lot. Night listened to Telugu cine songs. Slept in the house of my uncle Srinu with my cousin Hari by 10:00 (guarding their abode at night).

3 January (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned the two dailies. In today’s English daily The Hindu there was a contest of the Thompson Company for which the candidates have to write a “Best Wishes Greeting” addressing the players of the World Cup. I wrote a good slogan and sent it to the office of The Hindu in Chennai. My slogan to the World Cup team is “May a world of challenge, patriotism and team spirit enable you all to win the prestigious mega event of cricket”. The best 20 slogans bring the contestants prizes from the Thompson Company. Morning did not take my first class. In my second period, went to the class of first year Intermediate to simply while away my time. They asked me to sit in the classroom. They are preparing for their half-yearly exams. Afternoon read my subscription copy of India Today for some time. This issue of the weekly carries the year-end review of mega events. By 2:30 went to my friend’s hotel at Adduroad. We friends discussed the current trends of employment focusing on our personal lives. The discussion went on for more than three hours. Then we had a walk along the road for some distance toward village Koruprolu. It was a delightful experience. We had some sweets at a pushcart to celebrate the spirit of our youth. Night a serious discussion took place at home about general things. Went to sleep by 10:00.

4 January (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning pulled water from the well. Scanned the two dailies. Morning did not take my classes at the junior college because they have their half-yearly exams. Today they had their English paper. Went to the house of my uncle Srinu by 9:30. He is planning to extend the wall around his house. He has to borrow bricks from a nearby house. I got ready to help him. Both of us carried bricks in a basket. We carried out this work for one hour and deposited 300 bricks at his house. We loaded 15 bricks in each trip. They weigh about 30 kilograms. My palms are soft. So, they were affected. Blood boiled in my palms when carrying that heavy load. I could understand the strain of working class by this little physical work. Afternoon involved myself in the preparation of sweets at my home. My mother, my younger sister-in-law Kranti and my aunt Lakshmi were engaged in this work. I too helped them from 2:00 to 6:00. Many egoistic creatures think that men should not help women in their chores like cooking and hygiene. I am against this mentality. Listened to songs and went to sleep by 10:30.

5 January (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned the two dailies. By 9:00 went to Adduroad and spent some time talking with my friend Appalaraju at their hotel. By 9:30 started to Elamanchili by bus from Adduroad along with my cousin Hari. He bought readymade clothes for 200 rupees. We also bought clothes for my cousin Surendra (son of my uncle Srinu) for 60 rupees. We returned home by 12:00. Spent at the house of my uncle Srinu till 2:00. By 3:30 went to the weekly market at Adduroad and bought vegetables for Narasimhamurthy Raju, the tent house business partner of my brother Sambha. God created human body to help others a little. I helped him a bit in this regard. Night I could not listen to songs because there was a problem with the tape recorder. The name of Lord Krishna follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 10:00.

6 January (Monday)

Woke up by 4:00. Freshened up myself soon and awoke my brother Sambha to start to Narsipatnam Road railway station. We took my bicycle and left for the railway station. Dew was heavy due to intense winter. It was stealthily making its way into our ears. I enjoyed the tricky touch of the cold all the way. We reached the station by 5:00. Godavari Express arrived by 5:30. We received our brother Srinivas. He came from Ambala Cantonment on a short leave. He brought a heavy tent cloth used in military camps. We reached home by 6:00. Today I cancelled all my engagements and stayed at home to spend with my brother Srinivas. Morning rested on cot for some time. He too slept from 11:00 to 1:30. Both of us started to Raja Venkata Nagaram by 4:00 after meeting the Head Master at Viswa Shanthi Convent School in Adduroad. My nephew Sujan (his son) is studying there. My brother wants to take him to Ambala to educate him there in Army School. So, we went there to collect his Study Certificate from the school. We returned home by 5:30 from the house of my uncle Rama Raju. Night a serious debate took place at home among my folks. Went to sleep by 10:30.

7 January (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning pulled water from our well. Scanned the two dailies. Went to Adduroad by 9:00 to collect the Study Certificate of my nephew Sujan from the Head Master of Viswa Shanthi Convent School. He gave a certificate stating that Sujan had completed his first standard in the previous academic year itself. My brother wants to admit him into the second standard at the Army School after the entrance test. Returned home by 10:00. Went to the house of my uncle Srinu. My brother was talking with them. Before that he went to the local palmist Indira Devi along with my uncle Srinu. Many of our relatives already consulted her for her visionary comments about their lives. I took my brother Srinivas and nephew Sujan to Adduroad to see them off at the bus stop. They were going to Molleru Mallavaram. I carried his bag on my bicycle and he held his suitcase. My brother Sambha and I saw them off at Adduroad. Afternoon took my cousin Ravindra Varma to Elamanchili to buy clothes for him for the coming festival. My aunt Subhadra asked me to guide her son. I bought two shirts and one pair of trousers for him for 300 rupees at Kumar Showroom. We returned home by 6:00. Night a serious debate took place at our home about our financial crisis. It was because my father bought agricultural land borrowing money from lenders. Went to sleep by 10:00.

8 January (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning pulled water from our well for domestic consumption. Bathed myself and scanned the two dailies. Went to Koruprolu to meet the cashew merchant Venkata Rao and collect the money from him. My father is borrowing 3500 rupees from him for our domestic expenses. My brother Sambha and sister-in-law Kranti left for Tuni by 10:00. They are consulting a doctor to have children. Thence he goes to Samalkot railway station to see off our brother Srinivas and nephew Sujan on their journey to Ambala Cantonment by Link Express by 3:45. I took the duty of sitting at his tent house from morning to the evening. During this time, I evaluated the examination papers of the first year Intermediate students of Sri Prajna Junior College. I worked hard for more than six hours to complete about 20 answer papers. Afternoon my father and mother left for Visakhapatnam to consult the doctor. My mother is affected with the disorder of a small ulcer formation in her intestines. She is getting treatment from a gastroenterologist. Night they stay at the house of Devi, one of our relatives from Gollalagunta, currently living in Visakhapatnam. Night my uncle Srinu, my uncle Ramu and we spent talking till 9:00. Listened to Telugu cine songs. Went to sleep by 12:00.

9 January (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning pulled water from our well. Then scanned the two dailies. In today’s district edition of the Telugu daily Eenadu, there was a very critical report against Yejarla Sudarshana Raju, a neighbor to us. He is widely known as Potti Babu (short man) in our locality. He has been developing rapidly for the last ten years. Many say that he earned a lot of property in dishonest ways. No government officer can do any harm to him. He has reputation in the field of local politics. The native public opinion is that these newspaper reports can do nothing against him. Went to Adduroad by 9:00 to sit at the tent house and evaluate the answer papers of the half-yearly examinations of the second year Intermediate students of Sri Prajna Junior College. I put our small tape recorder on as long as the evaluation was going on. Such inspiring environment encourages me to give more marks to the students. Evaluation of answer papers provides me with zeal and thrill. I completed this task by 3:30. Then went to my friend’s hotel and spent talking with him for some time. We discussed the current trend of education degrees and the corresponding plight of candidates in getting jobs. Went to sleep by 11:00 after the enjoyment of winds of winter.

10 January (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned the two dailies. Went to Adduroad by 9:00. Opened the tent house and sat there. My brother Sambha went to our mango garden to check its readiness for the coming season. From 9:30 to 12:30 I was engaged in selecting important short and essay answer questions for the Intermediate students of the junior college for the ensuing public examinations for them to prepare. Afternoon went to the college and gave the evaluated answer papers to the Principal (my colleague) of the college. By today the half-yearly examinations of the Intermediate students are over. They have Sankranti holidays till the 19th of this month. I have already cleared much of my due work to these students. Returned home by 1:30 and had my lunch. Spent rest of my time casually. The cold waves of winter are piercing into the veins of body. Human psyche is resolved to understand the shortness of happiness of man on earth. Winter hints that the meaning of human existence is lethargy and gradual decay. Evening spent at the house of my uncle Srinu. My aunt Lakshmi offered me some homemade dishes. Night a small discussion took place at our home in which our familiar ones participated. Went to sleep by 9:30.

11 January (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. For the last six months, I have been sleeping in the open in the front yard of our house. This allows me to be caressed by the soft elements of nature depending on the corresponding season. Winter is the sweetheart of my solitary life. The cold winds mock at my passage of time. Morning scanned the two dailies. Started to our mango grove by 8:15 on our recently acquired Kinetic Luna. This vehicle was recently presented to my brother Sambha by his father-in-law. It is about 10 years old. I like riding this small bike. So, took it today for my pleasure trip. My cousin Hari accompanied me. We reached the hilly region by 9:00. We spent some time at the house of my uncle Narayana Murthy. Then we went to our mango grove to check the flowering stage of the trees. Silence was ruling over this garden. We breathed it happily. Returned home by 1:30. Evening went on a walk along with my friends in Adduroad. Night brought back our tape recorder from the mechanic in Adduroad. I spent 400 rupees for its minor repair. Night listened to songs on it. Watched television for some time. Went to sleep by 12:00.

12 January (Sunday)

Woke up by 6:00. By 8:00 finished scanning the two dailies. Today I saw an interesting ad in The Hindu. One need not invest money nor step out of one’s home. It is merely a bit of paper work. One can earn about 10,000 rupees a month. I wrote two letters to send to two persons in Chennai and Visakhapatnam to enquire about it. I badly need money now. It is very difficult to live in poverty. Remaining dependent on my parents for my financial needs seems to be an ordeal for me. Morning saw the Telugu film “Indra” of Chiranjeevi in cinema Lakshmipathi Raju Mahal for the third time. I took my cousin Hari also along with me. Afternoon rested at home for some time. By 4:00 went to the weekly market at Adduroad along with my uncles Srinu and Ramu (of Bhoopalapatnam) and bought vegetables. The name of Lord Krishna follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Night listened to Telugu cine songs on tape recorder. Went to sleep by 11:00.

13 January (Monday)

Woke up by 6:00. Scanned the two dailies. Went to post office by 9:00 to post the two letters. Received a call letter for interview for the position of “Post Graduate Teacher in English” from a Vellore based school. Previously I sent my application in response to their small ad in The Hindu (in its Sunday issue). This position is based in Jammu and Kashmir. The interview is scheduled to be held on 26th of this month at Vellore in Tamil Nadu. I want to attend it. Today it is “Bhogi” (the auspicious Hindu day of bonfire). I did nothing to feel the special thrill of this day. I don’t know why I have been remaining indifferent to these festive days for a long time. Perhaps somebody has to pour essence into my solitary life to activate me. Morning spent some time at my friend’s hotel in Adduroad talking with him about the issues of my life in the present competitive world. From 12:30 to 2:30 spent at home preparing the sweet rounds of boiled Bengal gram for the cooking of “Boorelu” by my mother. My associate in this work is my cousin Hari. Simultaneously we listened to songs on our tape recorder. Evening spent sitting in the dim sunshine in the front yard of our house. Cattle were grazing and children were playing in the open space before our house. Night listened to songs on tape recorder. Went to sleep by 11:00.

14 January (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned the two dailies. Washed my bicycle. Today it is Sankranti. Today it is a blissful day for participants and followers of cock fights in villages. Morning called up my friend Veeranjaneyulu in Hyderabad. I knew that he had recently moved to the spacious portion of a house in Doyen’s Colony near the HCU Bus Depot. He is deeply engaged in his field of art. Coincidentally, Ramesh, one of my close friends from the fine arts department of the University of Hyderabad, called me up from his home at Husnabad. He is doing well. Now he is working on an animation project in the Padmalaya Studios at Hyderabad. I went to the seashore by village Revu Polavaram on bicycle along with my uncle Ramu. This initiative was to spend this festival somewhat meaningfully. We took two familiar boys (Sampath and his cousin) along with us on our two bicycles to allow them to share the festive joy with us by the seashore. En route we halted at the house of my uncle Rama Raju for 15 minutes. My uncle Ramu, the promoter of this outing, stayed back here. My cousins Vasu and Naren joined us here. We resumed our bicycle trip to Revu Polavaram. We five spent by the seashore happily from 12:30 to 3:30. The local fishermen defaced this beach using it as a repository for their natural calls. The two boys enjoyed themselves playing on rocks and sand by the sea. Night listened to Telugu cine songs on tape recorder. Went to sleep by 10:30.

15 January (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Today there was no supply of the two dailies because it was a holiday for them yesterday at their offices. Morning pulled water from our well. The ground water level is decreasing due to absence of rain for the last few months. Many villagers are facing problems for drinking water. Morning went to our post office to collect my due amount of money sent for the Mahaayaagam at Srisailam. I knew that this program was cancelled because the fraud of the chief organizer of this event was discovered at the eleventh hour by the officials of the state government. Morning spent some time in the small mango grove near the house of my uncle Srinu. By 10:30 he left for watching the cock fights at our government school. He is a lover of this game of helpless fowls. I came back to home and listened to songs on our tape recorder for some time. Spent some time reading my subscription copy of Books Today bimonthly. There are many attractions in this edition as well. One needs a lot of money to buy all those books to satisfy one’s taste. India Today is greatly contributing to dissemination of knowledge and wisdom through this commendable publishing initiative. Afternoon went to the small Sankranti-related fair near the government school in our village. I took the two boys along with me (Sampath and his cousin). I lost 107 rupees at the dice desks of gambling. I could not withstand the temptation for this game. I regretted it after losing money. Evening borrowed 100 rupees from my friend Appalaraju in Adduroad. Night listened to songs. Went to sleep by 11:00.

16 January (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned the two dailies. In today’s section of the “Opportunities” in The Hindu, there are vacancies for teachers in Botswana. They need “degrees in education” or “years of experience” to recruit teachers. Right now I don’t fit these overseas assignments of excessive expectations. Better if I teach in India for a few years. By 9:00 went to our nearby filling station by main road to fill the tank of our Kinetic Luna to go to Tangedu. We started by 9:30. My uncle Ramu and I are the invited guests to the house of the parents of my sister-in-law Kranti in Tangedu. I rode the bike. We reached there by 10:30. Janaki, the mother of my sister-in-law, offered us plenty of festive sweets. I tried to eat the maximum lot possible. Thereafter I took Janaki to Shirdi Sai Baba Temple in Kota Uratla (half a kilometer from Tangedu) on the bike. She has been observing a course of regular weekly worships of this God on Thursdays, perhaps aiming at children to her daughter. My uncle Ramu and I returned to Ramayyapatnam by 2:30 to watch the Kanuma-centered fair in this village. I spent some time at the venue of cock fights. Helpless fowls were fighting between themselves to amuse the heartless mules around them. Vice has its demonic attractions. We returned home by 4:30. Went to a mechanic in Adduroad to get the Kinetic Luna repaired. Night listened to Telugu cine songs. Went to sleep by 11:00.

17 January (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned the two dailies. By 9:00 went to post office to collect my subscription copy of India Today. Morning my friend Kuracha Srinivasa Rao called me up from Narsipatnam. He told me that he would come to our house today. I observed every bus coming from that place between 11:00 and 1:00 sitting at the hotel of my friend in Adduroad. He did not turn up. Today I spent much of my daytime at the tent house. Afternoon went through the news magazine mentioned above. Evening had my haircut at my favorite salon in Sai Datta Complex. Right now my life seems to be a blend of impatience and disgust (the end product being frustration). The invaluable time lost vaguely in my present life questions me in my future. The youthful years that have been passing on without the love of a girl are another blow on my life of solitude. I pray Lord Krishna to settle me down in a good profession soon. It has to fuel my youth to explore the material comforts of this earthly existence. I have to earn a lot of money to get my face lifted by a plastic surgery to the scar on my chin. Watched television and went to sleep by 11:30.

18 January (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning it was very cold. So, I did not pull water from the well. Scanned the two dailies. Went to Adduroad by 9:30 and spent talking with my friend for some time. Then went to the tent house and spent there for some time. Returned home by 12:30 and had my lunch. Took siesta for two hours. I think winter can’t provide a good time for siesta. Only the blazing sun in summer can make the tired body sleep well. Afternoon sat at the tent house for two hours. My uncle Ramu also sat with me talking about the ordinary issues of the present society. Meanwhile my friends from the adjacent mike store pulled two sugarcanes from a tractor, which was halted on its way to Etikoppaka Cooperative Sugar Factory in Darlapudi. We passionately squeezed their sweet juice. My cousin Hari also joined us in this assignment. Evening went to the government school in our village to witness the diabolic pleasures of the participants in the cruel cock fight setting before them. The cocks were voluntarily applying blood on their bodies to keep up the happy moods of crazy blokes around them. Slept at the house of my uncle Ramu by 9:30.

19 January (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned the two dailies. There was an interesting ad in the matrimonial section of The Hindu. The parents of the bride are living in New Delhi. She is 26 and presently doing her final year course in Theater Arts. They don’t mind the mother tongue, community and region of bridegroom. They stated that they don’t offer dowry to bridegroom. I like their attitude. I wrote a letter of four pages to send them. I will send this letter to the office of The Hindu in New Delhi. God guides marriages. Destiny brings two creatures together when time commands. Morning spent casually at home. Winter is the season of young and passionate lovers. For bachelors like me, all seasons look alike. By 3:30 went to the weekly market at Adduroad and bought vegetables for Narasimhamurthy Raju. By 4:00 sold my old newspapers at a shop in Adduroad for 50 rupees. This money is very valuable for me in the present conditions. Went to Payakaraopeta along with my uncle Srinu to do a work and returned home by 9:00. Listened to Telugu cine songs on tape recorder. Went to sleep by 11:00.

20 January (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned the two dailies. By 9:00 went to post office to post the letter to the New Delhi based family in response to their matrimonial ad in The Hindu for their daughter. My prayer to God is to bless me with a good wife at the prime age of my solitary life. By 9:50 went to the class of second year Intermediate and distributed them the evaluated answer papers by me. By 11:40 took the class of first year Intermediate and distributed their evaluated answer papers of the half-yearly exams. Returned home by 12:30. Once again checked my arranged luggage for my short tour to Tamil Nadu. For this job centered journey, my father could provide me with 1500 rupees, borrowing it from a familiar one. My brother Sambha arranged the remaining amount of 500 rupees, the total of which I have proposed to them as my expected budget for the expenses on this tour. Took an auto rickshaw and reached Narsipatnam Road railway station by 4:00. Reached Visakhapatnam by 7:15 by Vijayawada-Visakhapatnam passenger. Put my suitcase in the cloakroom in the railway station and went out to have my supper in a nearby hotel. Accidentally I met the brother of my friend Viswa Prasad. He took me to their house. Had my supper there. Went to sleep by 9:30 in their house.

21 January (Tuesday)

Woke up by 3:00 leaving back a partially utilized night of sleep due to my engaged head keeping a journey ahead. Freshened up myself fast and reached Visakhapatnam railway station by 3:40 by walk along with the brother of my friend Viswa Prasad. Last night their family hosted me well. Both of us began waiting for the arrival of Coromandel Express (running between Howrah and Chennai). It arrived one hour late and departed by 6:00. With the help of my friend, I could get a seat in the last general compartment of the train. I waved my hand at him. The compartment got densely packed soon. I lost my privileged seat before touching Rajahmundry. I could not roughly deal with a wild Oriya boy. After request, got a window seat at Vijayawada Junction. From there our train ran at its scheduled speed and dropped me safely at Chennai Central station by 6:00. The only two halts between Visakhapatnam and Chennai were Rajahmundry and Vijayawada. I liked it. Taking a rickshaw and a bus, reached “Chennai Mofussil Bus Terminus” by 7:30. There I had a cup of hot milk. Before that what I had today during the preceding train journey were a bread-omlette, seven green bananas and half a kilo of grapes. Thence I took a video coach by 8:00 for Tanjore (the beautiful Indian name of this famous city is Thanjavur. Being brief is what we call “Modernity”. Thanks!).

22 January (Wednesday)

The fare of the Express bus was 128 rupees for my destination from Chennai. I liked the brilliant look of Chennai Bus Complex. I enjoyed the speed of the bus I took. They put on Tamil film songs for some time. Then, a Tamil film of Kartik (my favorite film actor) on the television in the bus. The cushion seats meant for sleep were comfortable. I pretended sleep. The cold wind entered the interiors to keep me awake. A fellow passenger took a small class to me to guide me toward my destination. After an eight-hour journey, covering about 300 kilometers, I got down from the bus at some place near/in Thanjavur district. From there I took an ordinary private bus and reached Pattukkottai by 5:00 in the morning. I walked to Periyasamy Building. Had a cup of tea in the last stall on the right side. There were hardly any facilities around to freshen up oneself. Near the office of C.S.M. Resources, above, a supposed room existed. I took it for granted. The supposed manager was interviewing the candidates scheduled for today. I observed these proceedings from 10:00 to 12:30. Then came down and walked to the nearby V.K.P. Lodge for my stay. I was allotted Room No. 107 for 80 rupees. I found an affordable place to rest in. Had my lunch and supper at a nearby hotel. Went to sleep by 9:30.

23 January (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:00. Freshened up myself and again resorted to bed for resuming my rest up to 8:00 because there was nothing to do for me that early in the morning. By 8:30 got ready and went out to have my breakfast at my familiar hotel. By 9:30 started to attend the interview in the office of C.S.M. Resources. For this purpose, I put on my pair of black shoes (the ones I recently bought in Visakhapatnam) for the first time in my life for a beautiful and official look. The pair was a bit tight. So, my carefree feet struggled inside fighting against the compression. The interview was over by 1:00.  Siva Murugesan, the Managing Director, asked me to correct a sentence in English and then verified my original educational certificates. I vacated my room in V.K.P. Lodge by 1:15 and took a bus for Thanjavur. It ran very fast and dropped me at my destination by 2:30. A kind Tamil Muslim took me to the old bus stand in Thanjavur on his bike. I reserved a ticket for Vellore in the bus of State Express Transport Corporation, the Route No. of the bus being 451, for 102 rupees. My seat number was 41. The scheduled departure time of the bus was 8:00 at night. I spent rest of my daytime reading the latest issue of the English weekly The Week. The Express bus started off by 8:10 with full load of passengers.

24 January (Friday)

The Tirupati bound Express bus released me at a bus junction in Vellore by 4:00 in the early morning. I waited there for one hour in the cold. Then I took a bus bound to Salem to get off at Pallikonda, the place of my next interview. Being advised by native people, I took another bus there for the nearby Gudiyattam where I can stay for two days and nights in a lodge. After a considerable survey of the costs of lodges, I ended up booking a double bed room in “New Sri Andal Café, Boarding and Lodging” due to scarcity of single bed room. The tariff was 59 rupees for 24 hours. My room number was 7. The booking time was exactly 6:00 in the evening. I was eventually led to my room by an old Telugu speaking man. Two washed bed sheets and one fresh pillow cover were served to cover the worn-out look of the bed and the pillow allotted to my lot for these two days. The spacious room looked very untidy and unpleasant. The attached bathroom, bed, fan, furniture, ventilation and the light arrangements perfectly matched the value of money I paid for that room. Let poverty reign in India to accommodate people like me in lodges worth a great deal of philanthropy. I spent mostly in the room and ventured out only for eating purpose. I thought an odd disease catches me in the lodge itself. Went to sleep by 9:30.

25 January (Saturday)

Woke up by 6:00. Freshened up myself by 9:00 and went out for my breakfast. Had an onion dosa for 13 rupees. I wondered as if I were living in a European country to pay these prices for the food items. Morning and evening prepared the notes given by our Reader Pingali Sailaja of University of Hyderabad on “The Structure of Modern English” and “English Language Teaching” in view of the interview scheduled to be held at “Janashiksha Matriculation School” at Pallikonda for the position of “Post Graduate Teacher in English” in Jammu and Kashmir. I prayed Mother Saraswati and Lord Gopal to bless me with success in this mortal combat. I begged for their compassion being ready to obey their commands. I felt homesick seeing Tamilians around me. They were all speaking Tamil only. I realized that one’s mother tongue is a great healer of one’s wounded psyche when one is put outside one’s motherland. Those living abroad seem to be hopeless victims of this universal phenomenon. One has to converse with God only inside when everybody around is a speaker of an alien tongue. Thanks to the time that was continuously pushing me ahead into my future to reach me to my state soon. Where is my Telugu? No doctor can save me from this turmoil except the people that speak Telugu around me everywhere. Went to sleep by 9:00.

26 January (Sunday)

Woke up by 4:30. Got ready soon and left New Andal Lodge. Handed the key of the room to the supervisor and had my breakfast in the same hotel by 6:00. It was really early in the morning. Took a video coach bus by 7:00 for Pallikonda. Took an auto rickshaw and moved to Shiksha Kendra Matriculation School. It was by National Highway 46. The environment in and around the school was inspiring and soothing. They interviewed me by 10:00. They asked me some questions on English literature and language. I could not answer them well. They did not find me suitable for the position of English lecturer in Jammu and Kashmir. They told me that they would get back to me within 15 days. Took a bus by 11:00 and reached Chennai by 3:30. Went to railway station (Chennai Central) and bought a general ticket for Vijayawada Junction. Took Grand Trunk Express (Chennai-New Delhi) by 4:00. It started from the station by 4:30. It is a super-fast Express but its speed did not match its name. Reached Vijayawada Junction by 11:00. Haunting sleep and chasing cold started playing with me. Moved to platform number 1 and sat on a bench. Television was on. I did not like watching it in that sleepy mood. My life is traveling like an old train. Many like it as an antique piece but few like to accompany it on its journey. Somebody has to love me. The ambience of the railway station did not allow me to sleep.

27 January (Monday)

Bought a super-fast express ticket to Annavaram by 3:30 for Ratnachal Express. Entrained it by 5:00. It departed by 6:10. The Godavari (a river flowing through Andhra Pradesh) was considerably filled with water. It’s a great pleasure to observe fresh water down traveling in a train on a bridge. Got off it by 10:30 at Annavaram station. Took an auto rickshaw there to reach bus complex in Annavaram. Thence took a bus for Tuni. From there took a bus for Adduroad. Reached my home by 2:00 in a rickshaw. I wore a white shirt and black trousers. They turned noticeably worn-out during my journey. Shampooed my head and washed the lethargy of my body soaping it thoroughly. Evening received an intimation letter from the ICFAI in Hyderabad asking me to attend a written test for the position of Language Editor to which I applied 15 days ago. The scheduled time of examination is 10:00 a.m. today. Evening called up Chandra Sekhar, the concerning Assistant Editor in that office, to ask him to consider me specially. Fortunately he assured me that he would get me included for the next written test. I felt grateful to God. Went to sleep by 10:00.

28 January (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. The fatigue of previous long journey came to an end by treatment of this sleep. I believe that there is a heavenly relationship between day and night. The kind motherly night spreads warm cover over the weary psyches of living beings. Nothing can compensate the loss of deep sleep on a good night. Dreams are inherent treasures of sound sleep. Morning my brother Sambha and my uncle Srinu went to Gollalagunta to distribute wedding cards (in view of the marriage of the latter’s younger brother Bhaskaram soon). I took the position of supervisor of the tent house. Not a single customer came today despite my long duty there. Spent my morning time reading the two dailies. Returned home by 12:00 and had my lunch. Took a siesta for one hour. Went back to my venue of temporary duty by 1:30. Evening went on a walk for some distance along the road to Koruprolu with my friend Appalaraju. He bought a glass of grape juice for me toward the end of this walk. It greatly rejuvenated my senses. Thanks for his kind treat. Recently my maternal aunt Surya Bhaskaramma came here along with my uncle Venkatapathi Raju from village Durgada. She spends with us for some days. Night we had a delightful talk among ourselves. Listened to songs. Went to sleep by 10:30.

29 January (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning pulled water from the well. Scanned the two dailies. Morning a serious clash took place involving the authoritative ego of my mother in her stand of a mother-in-law and my sister-in-law Kranti in her position of a victimized daughter-in-law in this orthodox and old-fashioned family. Both ended their conflict in a sob. My mother is stationed in her authoritative domain. So, she easily finds faults with the sensitive and disobedient attitude of her daughter-in-law. These two are not in good terms for long. Their outbursts are familiarized well to me but unbearable for me (both crying at the end with self-pity. My mother thinks that she is not cooperative toward her. She thinks that my mother is not affectionate toward her to help). Morning spent my time at home. Afternoon prepared an application for the position of “English Teacher” in Thailand. Went to post office by 1:45 and posted it. Then went to the house of my uncle Srinu to spend my time. Carried some bricks from a nearly place to their home for some time. Went to Adduroad by 5:30 to see my students of Intermediate in the college. They looked pitiable being entrapped in their “Mechanical Study Hours”. Went to sleep by 10:30.

30 January (Thursday)

Woke up by 6:00. Morning pulled water from the well. Then scanned the two dailies. Morning spent at home simply lying down myself on cot and frequently going to the house of my uncle Srinu. Did not have my lunch due to a minor sensation of stomachache. Afternoon spent most of my time at the house of my uncle Srinu. He was supervising the ongoing construction of the bathroom at their house. The ensuing marriage of his younger brother and the consequent arrival of the bride to his home as a guest necessitated the provision of these primary domestic facilities. Evening went to Adduroad and spent some time at the tent house. Went to Prajna Junior College also to see my students. They were all seriously engaged in their study hours. Their lecturers are supervising them in their respective hours. Night my uncle Srinu, my brother Sambha, my sister-in-law Kranti, my cousin Hari and I went to cinema Venkatapathi Raju Mahal in Adduroad and saw the recently released Telugu film “Bharathasimha Reddy” from 9:30 to 12:00. Secret and passionate lovers can greatly enjoy a second show film at late night during winter or rainy season. Where is my girl? When does she come to me? Alas! A creature is helplessly waiting for his sweetheart and marriage! Went to sleep by 12:30.

31 January (Friday)

Woke up by 6:00. Morning ironed a pair of clothes. Pulled water from the well. Then took a bath with hot water. Scanned the two dailies. Morning I told our paperboy not to issue me copies from tomorrow. I have been buying the English daily The Hindu and the Telugu daily Eenadu for the last six months. These two dailies carry immense treasure of knowledge which one fails to grasp by reading them page to page every day. It has been pleasure for me all these days to regularly read these two great newspapers. Most probably I will move to some other place during the first half of the next month. It might be for my job. This vision compels me to stop receiving these subscribed newspapers. This good habit can be continued from my next abode of stay. Morning and afternoon spent my time casually. Evening spent some time at the tent house. Spent in Prajna Junior College from 5:30 to 6:30 supervising the mechanical study hours of students there. Night listened to Telugu cine songs. Went to sleep by 10:30.

1 February (Saturday)

Woke up by 6:00. Morning washed a pair of clothes. Went to Adduroad by 9:30 and spent some time talking with my friend Appalaraju. Went to the class of second year Intermediate by 10:30. I clarified minor doubts of some students. By 11:40 went to the class of first year Intermediate. We discussed a few examples of sentence corrections. Only four students are actively responding to me. Others seem to be dullards. Afternoon spent much of my time at the tent house. My brother Sambha and my uncle Srinu went to Payakaraopeta to buy many things for the coming marriage. They returned by 5:30. I dedicate rest of this page to Lord Gopal. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Night listened to songs. Went to sleep by 9:30.

2 February (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent most of my time with my uncle Srinu. Rested on bed from 10:30 to 12:00. From 1:00 to 2:30 watched the cricket match on Maa Television channel being played by the film stars of Telugu film industry in Hyderabad. By 3:00 returned home from the nearby mango and cashew groves with a few twigs of margosa. My father and brother Sambha use them to brush their teeth. By 3:30 went to the weekly market at Adduroad and bought vegetables. Night listened to Telugu cine songs on tape recorder for some time. Thereafter ate sugarcane. I like the practice of squeezing sweet juice from sugarcane sticks. The name of Lord Gopal follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 10:30.

3 February (Monday)

Woke up by 6:00. Morning pulled water from the well. Took my maternal aunt Bhaskaramma to Adduroad by 8:30 to help her buy a sari. My father gave her 200 rupees for her to buy a sari. It is the formal gesture of a brother-in-law toward his sister-in-law. She bought a fancy sari for 220 rupees. Started to NRPM railway station by 9:00 on my bicycle to see off my aunt and my maternal grandmother going to Durgada. They came later by bus from Adduroad. Guided them via the temple of Lord Shiva and the adjacent pond to railway station. Today Visakhapatnam-Vijayawada passenger was one hour late. The platform was crowded with passengers. They got into a thickly packed compartment with much effort. Had my lunch by 12:00. Took a siesta for one hour. Afternoon went to Sri Prajna Junior College to take the Pre-public answer papers of Intermediate students for evaluation. From 2:30 to 5:30 seriously engaged myself in evaluating the answer papers of first year Intermediate students. Evening listened to Telugu cine songs from Vividha Bharati radio station. Night listened to songs on tape recorder. Went to sleep by 10:30.

4 February (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning pulled water from the well. Freshened up myself fast and sat for the duty of evaluating the answer papers of second year Intermediate students. At a stretch, I completed about 25 papers. Afternoon went to Mandal Parishad Upper Primary School in our village to collect the Record Sheets of two daughters of my uncle Ramu. These two girls would be admitted into another school at Bhoopalapatnam in East Godavari district. Their parents are going back to that village soon. Afternoon went to the house of my uncle Srinu. He was found seriously engaged in supervising the work of getting the bathroom related pump connected to the septic tank. After that we dug out the blocks of previously piled up bricks in earth. We planted a coconut sapling there after the surface was leveled. Evening went on a walk along with my friends from Adduroad along the road toward Koruprolu. One of them sponsored hot noodles at a pushcart in Adduroad for us. Night called up my friend Colin Leslie Kelman in Hyderabad and knew that the details about the next written test by ICFAI might be known in 20 days’ time. Evening it rained a bit to cool down the bodies of summer victims. Listened to radio. Went to sleep by 11:00.

5 February (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning pulled water from the well. Today I was mostly engaged in the errands related to the marriage of my uncle Bhaskara Raju. Evening went to Elamanchili to attend the marriage of my B.A. classmate Nookeswari at her home. My B.A. classmate Gangaraju accompanied me. We bought a memento of Welcome Board (meant to be hung at the entrance of a room) for 40 rupees to present her. We took a bus from Adduroad and reached there by 6:30. We went to the venue of wedding by 7:00. We saw our friend decorated in a wedding sari. She looked beautiful. She is a very short girl. It must be a hereditary factor. We gave our small gift to an associate of the bride. We wished her happy married life. Then we went up to the terrace of the house to observe the ongoing celebration of music and lighting. We had dinner by 8:30. We took leave of her and returned home by 9:30 by bus. This is season of marriages. Let marital joy spread across. Went to sleep by 11:00.

6 February (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning freshened up myself very soon and put on a pair of black trousers and a white shirt. Yesterday evening our English Lecturer Jaya Parvathy sent a word for me to meet her at government degree college in Elamanchili. With highly depressed spirit, I kept on waiting for an ordinary bus of Andhra Pradesh State Road Transport Corporation (the APSRTC, operating a large network of buses in the state with unreliable time schedules) for about two hours. Ended up taking a Luxury bus. In this bus, ticket would be issued by the driver himself through a machine. Should he concentrate on the road ahead or on the tickets to be issued to the passengers inside? The scoundrels that introduced this system should know it well. Met our English lecturer by 10:30. She advised me to be optimistic in aiming high and caring for it to achieve. We talked for one hour about the present competitive academic scenario. Took leave of her and returned to bus complex. I happened to see my B.A. classmate Sri Satya there. I did not talk with her. She used to be very reserved during our college days. She is one of the four girls known for their aloofness from rest of the class. Afternoon served the dinner food items to the guests at the “Gruha Pravesham” (formally entering a newly constructed house) occasion of Narasimha Murthy Raju, the partner of my brother Sambha in the tent house business. Spent rest of my daytime with my uncle Srinu. Went to sleep by 10:00.

7 February (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Reached Panduranga Swamy Temple in Payakaraopeta by 6:30 in the van arranged for the Upanayanam and Wedding occasions of my uncle Bhaskara Raju. The Upanayanam occasion came to an end by 11:30. A satisfactory number of guests and relatives attended this ceremony. Some boys went to the nearby cinemas to see their favorite films. I remained at the venue after a few errands. My teacher uncle Venkata Rama Raju arrived by 9:30. I spent with him thereafter. After his customary gossip with the familiar ones, I guided him to the nearby Udipi Hotel for his formal lunch of the occasion. After that he spent talking with his remaining acquaintances. We two reached the nearby bus stop in Tuni by 12:30. He has to attend a meeting at Pithapuram as part of his profession as the Head Master of a Government High School. Thereafter I rested for two hours in the temple complex. Returned home by 5:00 by bus to facilitate my brother Sambha and father stay back for the marriage at the venue this night. Night listened to Telugu cine songs on Vividha Bharati radio station and tape recorder. The wheel of my life is revolving around itself. Went to sleep by 11:30.

8 February (Saturday)

Woke up by 6:00. Morning pulled water from the well. By 8:30 the newly married couple (my uncle Bhaskara Raju and his wife) came here from the marriage venue in Payakaraopeta. According to the formal advice of the priest, this newly married couple has to enter the supposed auspicious home only after 10:00. The bride and the bridegroom spent in our house for two hours. They were tired and sleepy due to their late night marriage yesterday. They were ceremoniously escorted to the supposed house by 10:30. The appointed drummers beat their tools energetically to celebrate the auspicious moments of the occasion when the couple was stepping in with their right legs. Spent my time lying down myself on cot from 11:00 to 1:00. Then went to the house of my uncle Srinu where the newly married couple was staying. They are bound to spend their first three nights of conjugal life here. Afternoon helped my uncle Srinu going out on some errands. Today it is Radha Sapthami. It would be traditionally and spiritually observed by Hindu girls and women. My mother too worshipped the sun god in a customary fashion. Night listened to Telugu cine songs on Vividha Bharati radio station and tape recorder. Went to sleep by 10:30.

9 February (Sunday)

Woke up by 6:00. Spent all the day casually. I pray my Lord Gopal to save me from the present financial crisis. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Rama Krishna Govinda Narayana, Krishna Rama Govinda Narayana. Night listened to Telugu cine songs on tape recorder. Went to sleep by 10:30.

10 February (Monday)

Woke up by 6:00. Pulled water from the well. Went to the house of my uncle Srinu by 8:00. He was engaged in the works associated with his brother’s marriage. Went to Adduroad by 9:00 and spent there for some time. By 10:50 went to Sri Prajna Junior College to return the evaluated answer papers to the second year Intermediate students. The principal told me that the papers must be checked by the management before their issuance to students. I decided not to go to this college being disgusted with these foolish measures of the folks. Went to Payakaraopeta by 2:00 by bus. Walked to Vijaya Lakshmi DTP Center in Tuni via the main post office to get my curriculum vitae printed out. The typing and printing were over by 4:30. This time I had my curriculum vitae printed out on pink paper. It looks fantastic. I got some pink colored papers also printed out with a design of lines carrying my small black and white photo at the end to be used as my covering letters to be sent to employers along with my job applications. The total investment was 86 rupees. Returned home by 6:30. Today my brother Sambha went to our mango grove near hills to get pesticides sprayed on trees against his marriage anniversary today. Went to cinema Venkatapathi Raju Mahal by 9:00 and saw Telugu film “Mugguroo Asaadhyule”. Went to sleep by 1:00.

11 February (Tuesday)

Woke up by 6:00. Pulled water from the well. Went to post office by 9:00 to check if the envelope with the DD arrived from my brother Srinivas. It did not arrive. By 10:00 went to the house of my uncle Srinu and spent there till 12:30. They insisted that I should have my lunch there this afternoon. I did not like to disappoint them. So, had it with chicken curry. Afternoon went to Adduroad. My brother Sambha, at the tent house, told me to fetch the required leaves and flowers for the occasion of the worship of Lord Shiva tomorrow. I started on my bicycle by 2:00 and returned home by 4:00 with those items. Evening went on a walk along with my friends from Adduroad along the road to Koruprolu. We discussed the present competitive environment with its aspect of interviews and demonstration classes for the selection of teachers to work at low wages. Morning sent my application for the position of “Junior Lecturer in English” in Vignan College. Night did not listen to songs on tape recorder. Avoided watching television also. Went to sleep by 9:30.

12 February (Wednesday)

Woke up by 6:00. Went to Adduroad by 8:30 to scan The Hindu in the staff room of the junior college. The supposed mathematics lecturer did not bring his copy today. Went to post office and found it closed. Took the class of second year Intermediate by 9:50 to return their answer papers of the pre-public exams. From 11:40 to 12:30 the distribution of the answer papers of the first year Intermediate students took place. Had my lunch by 1:00 and napped for a while. Today it is the auspicious Hindu festival “Bhishma Ekadasi”, a mythological day, on which, Bhishma, a prominent person in the Maha Bharata, left this material world on a bed of arrows, to unite himself in the soul of Lord Vishnu. To celebrate this holy occasion, my parents organized the worship of Lord Satyanarayana Swamy under the guidance of a priest in our house. Evening attended the celebration of marriage of Lord Shiva with Queen Parvati in the temple of the prior in our village by pond. I liked the mantras melodiously chanted by the invited group of Brahmin priests. Night a Bhajan was conducted in our house by the invited ones. I did not participate in it. They drink liquor during the day and sing holy songs at night. Went to sleep by 10:30.

13 February (Thursday)

Woke up by 6:00. Went to Adduroad by 8:00 to scan the dailies. Left for Etikoppaka by 9:30. Reached State Bank of India there by 10:15. Deposited the Demand Draft for encashment. It values 6000 rupees. They paid me the money in 20 minutes. My brother Srinivas sent this DD to clear the dues of his monthly chit payments here. I used my bicycle for this journey to save ten rupees. Presently my financial condition is very bad. Now I don’t have even ten rupees to spend for anything. I can’t blame anybody except God who should take care of my overall welfare. My present state of plight is really unbearable for me. It is a test of time. Afternoon read the recent copy of India Today. Went to Zilla Parishad High School at Narayanapeta (Thimmapuram) by 2:00 and sat in the class of eighth standard for one hour testing their proficiency in English. From 4:00 to 5:00 spent in the public library at Koruprolu. Evening got my two lungi pieces stitched at a tailoring shop in Adduroad. Night listened to Telugu cine songs on Vividha Bharati radio station and tape recorder. Went to sleep by 10:30.

14 February (Friday)

Woke up by 6:00. Pulled water from the well. The water level decreased to the bottom of the well due to the fall of underground water level. The prevailing scenario is that many villages and cities in India are facing critical water crisis. It seems that the overburden of sins being committed by humanity in the world is resulting in the wrath of five elements. By 10:30 went to Mandal Revenue Office in Sarvasiddhi Rayavaram in an auto rickshaw along with my paternal uncle Ramu to get his ration card transferred to East Godavari district. He is soon moving to village Bhoopalapatnam in Kirlampudi Mandal of this district to the house of his in-laws along with his family from Peda Gummuluru. I am disturbed to imagine his going away from this village. I spent affectionately with him for some days. Separation is a giant of woes among the strong human relationships in this clumsy world. From 3:00 to 5:30 discussed “Transformation of Sentences in English” with the first year Intermediate students in the junior college. Night read portion of a book of the translated short stories from Telugu to English. Alladi Uma and M Sridhar (of the Department of English at University of Hyderabad) are the authors of this work. Went to sleep by 10:30.

15 February (Saturday)

Woke up by 6:00. Pulled water from the well. Went to Adduroad by 8:30 to scan the dailies. Went to the junior college by 9:00. The students were engaged in their study hours. My degree college friend Dara Konda (who is presently teaching Civics in this college) has to send his examination fees to the distance education department of Osmania University. Both of us left for the State Bank of India in Penugollu to buy the required Demand Drafts for it. We spent there from 10:30 to 12:00 for getting three DDs. I was very disgusted with the functioning of this bank. According to the stated time norms of the bank, a Demand Draft must be issued within eight minutes for which these idiots took about two hours. If a rich fellow comes with a large amount of money to deposit in their bank, these shameless donkeys work it out within minutes. Majority of banks in India are filled with such filthy and careless pigs only. They work like machines and lack intelligence of their own. Shame on them! Had my lunch by 1:00. Went to the college by 2:00 to show my copy of curriculum vitae to some of my colleagues who like to prepare their resumes in this format. Night watched television till 9:00 and then left for Revu Polavaram along with my cousins Hari and Ravindra. Night an annual fair takes place there by seashore. We reached there by 10:00. We slept on the floor of a nearby abandoned hatchery by 11:30.

16 February (Sunday)

Woke up by 2:30 in the building of abandoned hatchery by seashore in Revu Polavaram. Today it is Maagha Pournami. Today enthusiasts take a holy dip in the sea observing this holy occasion. Three of us spent walking along the seashore for one hour. By 4:00 my cousins Hari and Ravindra entered the sea to bathe. I remained by the seashore taking care of their clothes. I like watching tides standing by seashore. This sea has been living for ages. People come into this world, enjoy themselves spending by seashore and desert this world one day. Their lives are short but the lifespan of this sea is long. I am very little before it. We spent moving here and there for some time and returned home by 5:30. Moonlight was spread across the sky and the earth. Last night I could not sleep well and so rested till 8:00. Then woke up from the bed, Took a head bath and watched television for some time. Again resorted to bed by 10:00. By 2:00 went to Adduroad and spent talking with my friend Appalaraju till 4:00. By 4:30 went to the weekly market at Adduroad and bought vegetables for Narasimhamurthy Raju. Night my mother offered supper to my uncle Ramu (of Bhoopalapatnam) and my aunt Padmavathi. Tomorrow they go to Bhoopalapatnam. By 9:30 called up my friend Colin in Hyderabad. Listened to Telugu cine songs on tape recorder. Went to sleep by 10:30.

17 February (Monday)

Woke up by 6:30. These days my brother Sambha has been waking up early to milk our buffalo and for pulling water from the well after that to compete with me in the domestic chores. In view of my uncle Rama Raju’s ensuing journey to Tirupati to attend his cousin’s marriage there, I went to Narsipatnam Road railway station to enquire about the departure time of Tirumala Express and the fare to Tirupati. Returned home by 8:30 on my bicycle. Went to Adduroad by 9:00 to scan the dailies. Had my breakfast by 9:30 at home. My loving mother mostly prepares breakfast for me. I have been drinking a glass of hot milk every morning for the last six months. Went to the State Bank of India in Penugollu to buy a Demand Draft for my friend Appalaraju. Sent his application to Hyderabad by 11:30. Afternoon rested for some time. From 3:00 to 5:30 spent with the first year Intermediate students at the junior college. Evening attended the work of getting sweets packed for my uncle Rama Raju along with him. Night listened to Telugu cine songs. Went to sleep by 11:00.

18 February (Tuesday)

Woke up by 6:30. Pulled water from the well. Went to the house of my uncle Srinu by 8:30. He asked me to pull some water from the nearby well for them. I did it. Went to Raja Venkata Nagaram by 10:30. Today my uncle Rama Raju and my aunt Raja Kumari are leaving for Tirupati. They asked me to accompany them up to Narsipatnam Road railway station. They got ready by 2:00. Then we hired an auto rickshaw to the railway station. We reached there by 3:00. There was availability of reservation tickets but they preferred travelling in third class. The motivating factor is lack of required money. I pitied my financial status which did not allow me to buy them the reservation tickets. I bade them farewell by 3:45 by Tirumala Express. The compartment was thickly packed. I wish they got room to stand up at least. Returned home by 4:30. Went to the junior college to supervise the study hours of second year Intermediate students for some time. They had the practicals of their science subjects. Returned home by 5:00. Copied the poems of a Telugu mythological drama into a white notebook from a printed work for my father (he used to act in Telugu dramas on stage in his youth. Now he hums them at home frequently). Last night my friend Lahari visited me in my dream in an impressive manner. That dream was a heaven. Night listened to songs for some time. Went to sleep by 10:00.

19 February (Wednesday)

Woke up by 6:30. Morning did not pull water from the well. Went to Adduroad by 9:00 to scan the dailies. By 9:20 went to the junior college to scan The Hindu. There were no suitable vacancies for me in its “Opportunities” section. Went to my friend’s hotel and spent there for two hours. Returned home and watched television for some time. The World Cup show is there on television which I hate the most in the world. I brought a relative to our house by 1:30 from Adduroad. He was on his way to Gollalagunta. He is the eldest son of my father’s best childhood friend in that village. He talked with us for two hours. I started getting ready for my short stay in Hyderabad by 4:15. Reached NRPM railway station by 5:30 in an auto rickshaw. Luckily there was a vacant berth for Hyderabad. With a bribe of ten rupees, he got that berth reserved for me. My berth No. is 67 in the sleeper coach No. S 4 in Godavari Express. The train arrived half an hour late and departed by 7:00. Had my parcel of the homemade supper and started enjoying the comfort of train journey by 9:00.

20 February (Thursday)

Woke up by 3:00 in the coach of the train. I liked to sit by the exit to watch the name board of coming station. Meanwhile a railway police came and asked me who I was. I readily said that I was an authorized passenger. He wondered at the folly of a buffoon sitting by the exit at such odd hours in the loot-prone train journey. One has to be a victim of suspicion by these bugs unless one sleeps on one’s berth until the day breaks on earth. I cursed that bloke inside. Got off the train at Secunderabad station by 6:30. Took a city bus for Serilingampally. From there took an auto rickshaw and reached Doyen’s Colony by 8:00. After a little search I could find the rented apartment of my friend Veeranjaneyulu. He has been living in the Quarter No. 20 A for a few days. Called up my friend Colin and asked him to pick me up tomorrow morning to attend the intended interview by me. I spent rest of my daytime in the apartment talking with my friend and seeing his beautiful paintings. Evening went to the Kuchipudi dance ballet titled “Rama Katha Saaram”, performed by the disciples of Natya Guru Pasumarti Ramalinga Sastry, in Ravindra Bharati, sponsored by Chaitanya Art Theatres. We returned home late. Went to sleep by 1:00.

21 February (Friday)

Woke up by 5:00. Got ready soon and left the room by 7:00. Went to the eatery by the H.C.U. (Hyderabad Central University) Bus Depot and had a plate of purees after scanning today’s Telugu daily Eenadu. Reached the HCU main gate by 8:15. Colin picked me up by his Enfield bike. We reached the office of M.S.R. International, a private consultancy, dealing with overseas placements, by 9:45. It is in Secunderabad near Rethifile Bus Stand at the back of Hotel Rama Krishna, in Archana Arcade. We talked with the receptionist and preferred the vacancy in England. The total amount of money to be borne by me would be 3, 50,000 rupees for an ordinary job at a monthly pay of 1, 00,000 rupees. I filled in the prescribed data form and paid 200 rupees toward the registration fee of my name with them. Colin dropped me at Masab Tank. Afternoon accompanied Veeranjaneyulu to Serilingampally on an errand. Evening Sudhakar, Trinath, Veeru and I went to “Subhamastu Marriage Bureau” in Dilsukh Nagar to discuss a match for Veeru. He is looking for an angelic beauty. He is very shy. Way back, I bought two shirts and two lungies for me at a China Bazar store. Night Bhayya (my friend Kuracha Srinivasa Rao from the University of Hyderabad) came to see us from the HCU campus. Went to sleep by 1:00.

22 February (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Got ready soon and left for the University of Hyderabad by 8:30. Had my breakfast of three purees at Student Center Canteen. Then moved to Indira Gandhi Memorial Library. The security supervisor at the address book rejected my entry into the library on the ground of my not being the student of the university any more. Colin came by 10:30. We spent talking in the lawn opposite the library for some time. We moved to the nearby student canteen and had a cup of coffee. By 11:30 we went to the hostel room of our M.A. English classmate Manohar Babu. We had our lunch there by 1:00. Then we had an interesting debate among us friends for some time. Took leave of them and returned to the apartment of Veeranjaneyulu to pick my luggage and start to Nampally railway station. My friend Trinath accompanied me up to Secretariat by bus. From there I hired an auto rickshaw to the station. I got four glasses of fresh sugarcane juice filled in my bottle (amounting to one liter) for use during train journey. Godavari Express started off by 5:10 with me in one of its heavily packed third class compartments. A gentleman earned a comfortable seat for me. My supper was sugarcane juice and four ripe bananas. My sleepless journey continued.

23 February (Sunday)

Reached Narsipatnam Road railway station by 5:45. Took an auto rickshaw and reached my home by 6:30. Spent all the day casually at home. Evening Chandrasekharan called me up from Jammu and Kashmir. Presently he is working as an English lecturer there. I met him at Pallikonda in Tamil Nadu when I attended an interview there for the position of English lecturer in Jammu and Kashmir. He was selected for this position in that interview. He is about 55. He has been teaching for the last 20 years. He told me that he can join me his present college as an English lecturer if I am interested in it. I replied in the negative. I thanked him for his goodness toward me in this regard. The name of Lord Gopal follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 10:30.

24 February (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning went to Adduroad and spent some time with my friend Appalaraju at their hotel. Returned home by 10:00 and rested on cot. Recently cracks developed on my tongue due to vitamin deficiency. By 3:30 went to the junior college and discussed English grammar with the first year Intermediate students. I continued this class for two and a half hours which they bore very patiently. Night called up my teacher uncle Venkata Rama Raju in Jaggampeta to discuss the issue of my being sent to England for a job. He is the person my father believes in readily when larger monetary issues such as this are involved. After his convincing words, my father turned in favor of sending me abroad. Night I seriously talked with my father regarding my journey to England for employment. The amount of money, which I have to bear to go to England, is about four lakh rupees, which appears to be quite unaffordable for us in the present state of domestic financial crisis. I took a serious class to my father to motivate him the best. Listened to songs on tape recorder. Went to sleep by 11:00.

25 February (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Went to Adduroad by 8:00 to scan the dailies. Then went to Gopala Krishna Photo Studio to give my negative for the development of 12 passport size color photos. They are required to apply for visa for my travel to England. They asked for 16 photos at the consultancy in Secunderabad. Returned home by 9:30 and rested till 11:30. Had my lunch and went to Adduroad by 12:00. Sat at the tent house for two hours going through an English dictionary for some time. Bought two pomegranates for five rupees and tried to have them carefully. Yet they stained my clothes. Earlier I did not have them. I liked the fruit. Saw the Telugu film “Idiot” for the second time in cinema Venkatapathi Raju Mahal from 2:00 to 5:00. My uncle Chanti also accompanied me to see this film. From 5:00 to 6:30 spent at the tent house. Sold the shirt (one of the two I recently bought at a China Bazar store in Hyderabad) of small size to one of my friends and bought a “Kumar Shirt” in Vasavi Srilakshmi Cloth Store opposite our tent house with that money. Night listened to songs on tape recorder. Went to sleep by 10:30.

26 February (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Pulled water from the well. Went to Adduroad by 8:00 to scan the dailies. Returned home and had my breakfast by 9:00. Went to post office to collect my copy of India Today. It did not arrive yet. Went to the junior college by 10:30 to scan The Hindu. Carefully checked its “Opportunities” section to see if there was any suitable vacancy for me. They don’t want a layman like me. Experience is the mantra of today’s employment world. My colleague asked me to write some catchy quotations on friendship for him. I wrote ten and gave him. They are all classic pieces highlighting the theme of friendship. These folks mostly use them to give to their students in this college before the coming summer holidays. I regretted that eventuality. From 3:00 to 5:00 spent with the first year Intermediate students discussing English grammar. The annual exams are around the corner. So, they are hardly listening to me. Today my father met a moneylender to ask him for money for my job purpose. He responded positively. Night listened to songs on tape recorder. Went to sleep by 10:30. 

27 February (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Went to Adduroad by 8:00 to scan the dailies. Returned home by 9:30 to witness a complex conflict between my mother and my sister-in-law Kranti. At a stage, my sister-in-law burst into tears. I did not find any other way than to seriously rebuke my mother against the suffering of the other person. Spent rest of the day casually. Afternoon went to the house of Venkata Rao, a noted cashew merchant in Koruprolu, to enquire about the availability of money, we asked him recently for, to pay to my consultancy, to allow them to apply for my visa. He did not move this issue even a bit further. Night a serious discussion took place among ourselves over the issue of frequent conflicts between my mother and my sister-in-law Kranti. It hurt the two people. We can’t find fault with either of the two, when we discuss an issue from an analytical and objective perspective, based on rationality and impartiality. The generation gap seems to be the motivating factor to the misunderstanding between my sister-in-law and my mother. The present generation girls don’t like being bossed by others, particularly by their mothers-in-law. Went to sleep by 10:30.

28 February (Friday)

Woke up by 6:00. The water in our well turned muddy reaching the bottom of it. Despite my frequent appeals to our washerwoman to come home and collect the worn-out clothes for washing, she did not turn up. Perhaps her unwillingness may be due to lack of water resources to carry out the duties of their profession. To avoid this menace, I washed my clothes this morning. I am good at washing my clothes. I started it in Gollalagunta when I was a student there. Went to the junior college and discussed “Precise Writing” with the second year Intermediate students from 9:50 to 10:40. Rested on bed till 12:00 and then had my lunch. Went to the house of my aunt Subhadra to watch their color television for some time. Toward the end, watched the classic comedy Telugu feature film “Ladies’ Tailor” of Rajendra Prasad, directed by Vamsy. Much of the credit goes to this distinguished director. Nasty power cut occurred by 4:00 and disconnected me from this entertainment. Spent in the junior college from 4:15 to 5:00. Started a walk along with my friends by 6:00. Night listened to Telugu cine songs on tape recorder. Went to sleep by 10:30.

1 March (Saturday)

Woke up by 6:00. Pulled water from the well. Went to Adduroad by 7:30 to scan the dailies. It is a very important day today for Indians in two respects. Devotees worship Lord Shiva as it is Maha Shivaraatri today. Then there is prestigious fight between India and Pakistan as part of the World Cup at Centurion Stadium in South Africa. Spent with the second year Intermediate students in the junior college from 9:50 to 10:40. Told them to write a personal letter in view of their coming public exams. The first year Intermediate students deliberately told me not to come to their class today. Afternoon spent watching television in the house of my aunt Subhadra. The classic Telugu feature film “Rudraveena” was telecast on Gemini television channel. It portrays clash between orthodoxy and idealism. From 7:00 to 9:00 again watched the same television channel. Then moved to Ramayyapatnam to watch a Telugu stage play called “O Neethee Nee Sthaanamekkada”. It is a social drama discussing the filth in the present corrupt Indian society. Watched it attentively from 12:00 to 4:00.

2 March (Sunday)

Spent most of my time at home. The name of Lord Shiva follows. Shiva Shiva Shankara Shambo Sankara. Shiva Shiva Shankara Shambo Sankara. Shiva Shiva Shankara Shambo Sankara. Shiva Shiva Shankara Shambo Sankara. Shiva Shiva Shankara Shambo Sankara. Shiva Shiva Shankara Shambo Sankara. Shiva Shiva Shankara Shambo Sankara. Shiva Shiva Shankara Shambo Sankara. Shiva Shiva Shankara Shambo Sankara. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Maha Shiva. Went to sleep by 10:30.
3 March (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning fetched a few buckets of water from a nearby well. Yesterday afternoon we got the bottom of our well cleaned. Went to Adduroad by 8:00 to scan the dailies. Sat in the second year Intermediate class, in their second period, supervising their study hours. Their annual exams are around the corner. Still the college management is asking them to attend the classes. I don’t like this mechanical system of private educational institutions. They seldom hear the voice of their students. They know what to study and how to prepare for the coming exams. They must be left free to decide their ways of intensive preparation. Went to the class of first year Intermediate students, in their fourth period, to supervise their study hours. Had my lunch by 1:00. Rested from 1:30 to 3:30. Summer in India demands afternoon relaxation. Went to Adduroad by 4:00 to spend my time. Went to the government high school in Thimmapuram (also called Narayanapeta and Adduroad) to meet my friend Appalaraju (he is presently working as a “Voluntary Teacher” in this school). Night wrote a letter to the Maa television channel in Hyderabad asking them for the postal address of the parents of a cute boy called Deepak Swaraj. I saw him recently on this television channel in a dance program. He is so cute that I wanted to get his photo from his parents. Night listened to songs. Went to sleep by 10:30.

4 March (Tuesday)

Woke up by 6:30. Went to Adduroad by 8:00 to scan the dailies. Today the ceremony of the worship of Lord Anjaneya Swamy was held in Adduroad in His small temple. The vysyas (community of shopkeepers) (the Hindu society is divided into four segments by the religious heads of the past: Brahmana, Kshatriya, Vysya and Soodra. The fifth segment added later was “Panchama Varnam”) in this locality have been celebrating it for the last four years. They treat Him as their presiding deity in this region. Free food was served to the poor on a large scale marking this holy occasion. Went to the class of second year Intermediate students to supervise their study hours from 9:50 to 10:40. Spent with the first year Intermediate students from 11:40 to 12:30. Had my lunch by 1:00 and left for Elamanchili by a bus. My intention was to check the authenticity of the website of M.S.R. International, the private consultancy through which I am due to leave for England for my job. I did not find that website at all. Returned home by 4:00. Called up my friend Veeranjaneyulu in Hyderabad, to his cellular phone, and informed him to ask the folks at this consultancy some questions. He enquired them fast and clarified my questions. Evening walked through the nearby groves along with my uncle Srinu to collect margosa tooth sticks for our domestic consumption. It was dusky. I enjoyed that spell of sky. Night listened to Telugu cine songs. Went to sleep by 10:30.

5 March (Wednesday)

Woke up by 6:30. Freshened up myself, dressed up myself and then left for our mango grove on my bicycle. I had to bring our sun-baked soapnuts from there. Returned home by 8:00 with the load of the bag of soapnuts. Had my breakfast and went to Adduroad by 9:00 to sit at the tent house. The managing partner (Narasimhamurthy Raju) had some other job to attend. I spent there for five hours in the morning and afternoon. He relieved me by 3:30. Returned home and started soon to our mango grove to bring soapnuts. Started back by 4:00 and returned home by 6:00. Evening we received a letter from my brother Srinivas. He commented positively on my going to England for the job. Evening my father consulted some of his acquaintances to know about the trustworthiness of some consultancies that promise sending job seekers to foreign countries. Their feedback was negative. He was thoroughly discouraged from sending me abroad through this channel after listening to their cautionary words. I regretted it. My Lord Gopal has to guide me toward this achievement. Went to sleep by 10:30.

6 March (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. It has been my habit for long to drink a glass of water into my empty stomach. It cleans the dirty bag of food every morning. After this, started to our mango grove to bring soapnuts. Reached there by 6:45, instantly tied the bag of soapnuts at the back of my short bicycle and returned home by 7:30. Went to my favorite salon in Adduroad and had my haircut. When the barber was cutting my hair, a fisherman came and demanded immediate shaving of his beard. To resolve this issue, I told the barber to attend him first. I sat idly. Returned home and Had a head bath. Went to open the tent house by 9:30. By 10:00 left for Etikoppaka in an auto rickshaw to encash the DD of 2100 rupees at the State Bank of India. My brother Srinivas sent it from Ambala Cantonment to clear his monthly chit payment dues here. From 12:00 to 3:00 spent at the tent house supervising the business. By 5:00 left for our mango grove to bring the remaining load of soapnuts on my bicycle. By this time the sky was partly cloudy. Breezes teased me. Night listened to Telugu cine songs. Went to sleep by 10:30.

7 March (Friday)

Woke up by 6:00. Had my breakfast by 7:30 and went to Adduroad to scan the headlines in today’s dailies. A debate took place by 9:00 with the tent house partner (he is very familiar to us) regarding his lending money to us. He said that he would give the money to us only after my father gives him the filled in promissory note. I was hurt to hear such words from him. Because I am not earning money now, I looked like a worthless bloke to him. He could not trust me. I would pay miserly creatures like him in the same coin one day. Only my Lord Gopal has to bless me with enough money to deal with this selfish world. Spent some time with my uncle Srinu under the shade of mango tree at his house. He was trying to cut the end of the tail of their puppy thinking that it would transform it into a ferocious dog in future. Afternoon watched television in the house of my aunt Subhadra. Went to Narsipatnam Road railway station by 4:00 to book a sleeper class berth for my father to Hyderabad. Went to sleep by 9:30.

8 March (Saturday)

Woke up by 6:00. Pulled water from the well. Started to Narsipatnam Road railway station by 7:45 on my bicycle. Got the previously booked reservation ticket for Hyderabad to Godavari Express for my father for this evening cancelled due to the postponement of our journey to tomorrow evening. He charged 65 rupees for the cancellation of ticket. My father loses two days’ salary from his sugar factory if he starts today. Returned home by 8:30. By 10:30 went to the house of Narasimha Murthy Raju (the tent house business partner of my brother Sambha) and collected 20,000 rupees after giving our filled in promissory note to him. He is a mean materialist. Watched television from 12:00 to 4:00 at home. A Telugu film, highlighting the social and moral issues, arising out of artificial insemination to a married woman, was telecast. I watched it interestingly. Soundarya played the main role. From 4:30 to 6:00 spent in the company of my uncle Srinu. By 8:30 my brother Sambha returned from Jaggampeta with the borrowed money from my teacher uncle Venkata Rama Raju. Night spent talking with my uncle Srinu at our house. Went to sleep by 10:30.

9 March (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Had my breakfast and left for Payakaraopeta by 8:00 by a bus. By 8:30 went to Lakshmi Computer Center in Tuni. From 9:00 to 11:30 attended my work there. Now I am engaged in the task of leaving for London for a job. A private consultancy in Secunderabad guides me in this regard. They are asking for 3, 50,000 rupees for it. When I am getting ready to pay them that much money, I should know many things about them. I have to ask them many questions to check their trustworthiness in this regard. Otherwise I would be considered a fool by my parents and relatives if anything goes wrong in the middle. I prepared 15 questions for this purpose. The managing director of that consultancy has to answer them to make me believe that he is a reliable person. I got some other related forms also prepared on computer. I spent 80 rupees for the typing and printouts of these forms. Returned home by 1:00 by bus. Had my lunch and rested on cot for two hours. Started getting ready for our journey by 3:00. Had my supper by 5:00. Started to Narsipatnam Road railway station by 5:30 along with my father. We got into a general compartment in Godavari Express by 6:15. We are going to Hyderabad. We could get seats by the time the train reached Rajahmundry railway station. We felt relieved. Many remained standing throughout the journey. We were lucky to get a little room to sit among those sufferers. We were waiting to reach Hyderabad.

10 March (Monday)

We got off Godavari Express at Secunderabad railway station by 6:00 and came out to take a city bus for our destination. We reached the rented abode of my friend Veeranjaneyulu by 7:30 and freshened up ourselves. I took my father to Kanyaka Bank at Kukatpally to allow him to meet our distant relative working in it. Thence I returned to the HCU campus to get some things done. Got my educational certificates photocopied at Shopping Complex. Went to English department by 11:30. Meanwhile my friend Colin Kelman came there. Got the photocopies of my educational certificates attested by English Professor K Narayana Chandran, the present Head of Department of English. Being dropped at the university main gate by Colin on his Enfield bike, returned to the abode of Veeru by 1:30. Had my lunch and rested till 3:30. By 4:00 left for Kachiguda by bus from the HCU Bus Depot. After a short walk from Barkatpura, met my cousin Kiran in Manjeera Boys’ Hostel and gave him the money and homemade sweets his parents sent for him from Jaggampeta. We bought a bag in the market at Kothi. Then I returned to Doyen’s Colony. Went to sleep by 11:30 in the abode of Veeranjaneyulu.

11 March (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Got ready soon and left for Kukatpally by 7:45. Taking two auto rickshaws from the starting point, I reached Kanyaka Bank by 9:15. There was traffic jam for 20 minutes. On the advice of my father, for safety sake, deposited 80,000 rupees in Kanyaka Bank, into the account of Varma, our distant relative working in that bank. Went to Madhura Nagar at Yousufguda to find the residential address of one of our relatives. He is supposed to be an honorary guide in our deal with the consultancy, which is sending me abroad. His postal address my uncle gave in Tangedu was found to be outdated. Returned to the abode of Veeru by 12:30. Had my lunch and left for Serilingampally along with Veeru on an errand. We returned by 4:00. Rested for one hour. Left for Ravindra Bharati by 5:15 along with our friend Sudhakar. From 7:45 to 9:30 we watched the Telugu play “Guna Nidhi”. Our friend Trinath (he is from Theater Arts Department of University of Hyderabad. He is a disciple of Bikshu) played a role in it. The techniques and the management of stage property were praiseworthy. Trinath too played his role well. By 10:00 had my supper at Ruchi Hotel in Gulmohar Park area. Went to sleep by 11:30 in the abode of Veeru.

12 March (Wednesday)

Woke up by 4:00 in the rented apartment of my friend Veeranjaneyulu and got ready soon. Dressed up myself and left his abode by 8:00 taking leave of the friendly hosts in this place. Taking two auto rickshaws, reached Kanyaka Bank at Kukatpally by 9:00. Met my father there. He was waiting for me. Called up the receptionist at MSR International in Secunderabad and told her about our intended meeting with the Managing Director of this consultancy by 1:30 this afternoon. As scheduled, my father, our relative Varma and I went to the office of this consultancy and interacted with him for more than one hour. We have to spend four lakh rupees to go to England for an ordinary job. Being scared of this heavy burden of money, I instantly moved to the option of going to Alaska on one year work permit for a fish packaging job. The expenditure is two lakh rupees. Monthly salary is one lakh rupees at least. We paid him 70,000 rupees retaining 10,000 rupees with us for my related expenses. I can go to Alaska within four months by God’s grace. By 5:00 we took Visakha Express at Secunderabad railway station and started back to home.

13 March (Thursday)

We got off Visakha Express at Tuni by 6:00, came out of the station and walked to bus stand in Payakaraopeta. My father does not like taking a rickshaw fearing the charge. We took a taxi bound to Visakhapatnam. We paid the ordinary bus fare of the route to him and reached Adduroad by 7:30. We reached home in a rickshaw. My father bargained with the rickshaw puller for three rupees whereas that poor man honestly asked for five rupees. I hate the stupidity, miserliness and cursed lives of people like my father. These are all rich beggars in the Indian society. Feeling very tired and sleepless, due to the hard journey in the third class compartment, slept on bed till 5:00. Then started writing letters to Reader Pingali Sailaja in Hyderabad and my teacher uncle Venkata Rama Raju in Jaggampeta. Wrote an eight-page letter to Sailaja explaining the philosophy of my life and the guiding factors behind it. I discussed three issues in the present India in the letter to my uncle. Went to sleep by 9:30.

14 March (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Went to post office by 9:00 to post the two letters. Found it closed due to national holiday of Muharram. Rested at home from 10:00 to 12:30. Then had my lunch and went to Adduroad. Kept my bicycle at a repairer’s shop for its minor repair and fitting of new tyre and tube to its rear wheel. It cost me 140 rupees. When my bicycle was at the repairer, I went to cinema Venkatapathi Raju Mahal and saw the recently released Telugu film “Yuvaratna”. It is one of the worst films I have ever seen. It represents the fall of the present Telugu film industry. When entertainment deteriorates to these levels, one can’t dare go to a cinema for seeing a film. This is why good films also fail at cinemas now and then. Returned home by 5:00 with my repaired bicycle. It is oiled well and is looking like a shy bride. I like it. Night engaged myself in filling in the application form of “Thai Sikh International School” sent from Thailand in response to my previous reply to them to their ad in a newspaper. Enclosed a three-page covering letter explaining my mission of teaching to them. Went to sleep by 10:00.

15 March (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:00. I turned furious with my mother when pulling water from our well. So, poured two buckets of drawn water down, which is rare in these scorching summer days. She was complaining something against her daughter-in-law Kranti to me. Went to Adduroad by 8:00 and had my breakfast of two purees at my friend’s hotel. Then went to the house of our washerwoman to request her to come and collect the dirty laundry from our house. Ensured that her dues were cleared completely. Went to post office by 9:00 to stamp and post three letters. Went to State Bank of India in Etikoppaka by 10:30. Deposited 600 rupees into my savings account. I returned them the six soiled 100 rupee notes, which they gave me earlier. Returned home by 11:30. Had my lunch by 12:00. Then went to the house of my aunt Subhadra. Spent there watching television till 5:00. Then went to the house of my uncle Srinu chewing the sugarcane sticks he brought from Etikoppaka sugar factory. Night it was cloudy and cool due to depression over the Bay of Bengal. Listened to Telugu cine songs. Went to sleep by 10:00.

16 March (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent most of the day at home. By 3:30 went to the weekly market in Adduroad and bought vegetables. Night listened to Telugu cine songs on tape recorder. The name of Lord Gopal follows. Rama Krishna Govinda Narayana, Krishna Rama Govinda Narayana. Rama Krishna Govinda Narayana, Krishna Rama Govinda Narayana. Rama Krishna Govinda Narayana, Krishna Rama Govinda Narayana. Rama Krishna Govinda Narayana, Krishna Rama Govinda Narayana. Rama Krishna Govinda Narayana, Krishna Rama Govinda Narayana. Rama Krishna Govinda Narayana, Krishna Rama Govinda Narayana. Rama Krishna Govinda Narayana, Krishna Rama Govinda Narayana. Rama Krishna Govinda Narayana, Krishna Rama Govinda Narayana. Rama Krishna Govinda Narayana, Krishna Rama Govinda Narayana. Rama Krishna Govinda Narayana, Krishna Rama Govinda Narayana. Rama Krishna Govinda Narayana, Krishna Rama Govinda Narayana. Rama Krishna Govinda Narayana, Krishna Rama Govinda Narayana. Rama Krishna Govinda Narayana, Krishna Rama Govinda Narayana. Rama Krishna Govinda Narayana, Krishna Rama Govinda Narayana. Went to sleep by 10:30.

17 March (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Pulled water from the well. Went to Adduroad by 7:30 to scan today’s dailies. Had my breakfast by 8:30 at home. From 9:00 to 11:00 spent reading the latest copy of India Today. This issue of the weekly carries the visionary notions of famous personalities in the world on the theme “India: A Giant or a Pigmy in Future”. The title of this annual event is “India Today Conclave”. The views of foreign speakers are constructed well. Went to government high school in Thimmapuram by 11:30 to spend teaching English to the eighth standard students there till 12:30. Returned home and had my lunch by 1:00. It started raining by 2:00. It is a great relief for many in this summer. It is due to a depression over the Bay of Bengal. Recently I have become very slim due to the journey and fatigue underwent by me during the recent tour to Hyderabad. Despite good habits, I am not growing adequate flesh on my cursed bones. May God bless me with sufficient weight. Night listened to Telugu cine songs on tape recorder. Went to sleep by 9:30 for my dreams.

18 March (Tuesday)

Woke up by 1:00 in the earliest morning of today and the late night of yesterday. My uncle Rama Raju came from Raja Venkata Nagaram on his way to Annavaram to attend a marriage there. I also accompanied him for the sake of pleasure involved in attending a marriage ceremony. We reached Annavaram railway station by 2:00 in a taxi. We were assigned the duty of receiving the guests of bridegroom party coming from Hyderabad by Godavari Express. The train arrived by 5:00. We guided the guests into the arranged vehicles for them. From 6:30 to 7:30 I spent very happily on the temple hill Ratna Giri of Lord Veera Venkata Satyanarayana Swamy. I always find it a great thrill to spend among the animated participants of a wedding ceremony. People were moving here and there with the responsibility of some kind. The accommodation facilities are good on this hill. We had our breakfast by 8:30. I placed myself in a room to rest for a while. A party of gamblers awoke us saying that it was their territory. I ended up sleeping among the barbers that came to beat drums for the marriage occasion. Cold was thrilling on the hill.

19 March (Wednesday)

Woke up by 1:30 (late night of yesterday) along with the barbers. They blew their pipes and beat their drums to drive away evil spirits around the marriage venue. However, their rhythmic sounds matter to those with musical bent of mind. The bridegroom tied the holy yellow thread around the neck of the bride at 3:20, authorizing himself to guide rest of her married life with him. This ceremony was over by 5:00. Guests were busy having their breakfast. I left this setting by 8:00. Started back to home in the same taxi of bride party. Reached home by 9:30. The fatigue of last night’s sleeplessness was dancing on my face. Freshened up myself and turned to bed for rest. In the meantime, my mother and her two sisters came, after attending the wedding ceremony of their relative Devi’s daughter in Visakhapatnam. Afternoon rested for two hours. Evening engaged myself in the task of clearing the worn-out shelter of palmyra leaves (in Telugu it is called “Pandhiri”) in the front yard of our house. Night listened to songs. Went to sleep by 10:00.

20 March (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Went to Elamanchili by 9:30 by bus. I had two important things in my mind to attend. Had my breakfast at Ganga Hotel (general thing). Bought a pair of synthetic thongs of Rotomac Company at a roadside stall for 110 rupees. These are of black color. I liked the design. Then went a little ahead along the main road and bought Old Spice shaving cream, Close Up toothpaste, Lifebuoy Plus soaps and a pack of Swish blades at a shop (general thing). Thence walked to State Bank of India. In a recent transaction at the State Bank of India in Etikoppaka, I took a soiled 100-rupee note. I was made responsible for it by my folks at home to exchange it for a new one. I pasted a neatly cut white piece of paper over the torn part of the currency note and exchanged it for a new one. Every Thursday this bank facilitates exchange of soiled currency notes. When the two scheduled works, the purchase of flip-flops and the exchange of soiled currency note were over, returned home by 11:00 by bus. Had my lunch and went to the house of my aunt Subhadra. My cousins Hari, Ravindra and I took the wedding party bus to Srikakulam district by 2:45. The marriage is of the eldest son of Rama Raju, the owner of an electrical store in Adduroad. It was a four-hour journey. We reached the marriage venue by 7:00.

21 March (Friday)

The bridegroom knotted the holy yellow thread around the neck of the bride by 5:45. Thus the wedding came to an end. The bride is short and not considerably beautiful. The bridegroom is also short. So, there is nothing to worry comparatively. Our two buses started back by 7:30. It is village Devuni Paalavalasa in Ranasthala Mandal in Srikakulam District (this is my first touch with the soil of this district). There are about 50 households in this hamlet. There are five Kshatriya families. There are no even basic amenities like electricity, road and bus for this village. However, the fact is that the essence of real India can be found in these thatched huts of Indian villages. We reached Peda Gummuluru by 11:00. Came home, freshened up myself and turned to cot to clear the fatigue of the last night’s sleeplessness. Got up by 1:30 and had my lunch. Again rested for one hour. Then took out a recent copy of English weekly The Week and read it for a while on the issue of “America’s Threat to Iraq”. Then read India Today for a while. By 4:00 went to the house of my uncle Srinu and spent there for half an hour. Night listened to songs. Went to sleep by 11:00.

22 March (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:00. Today I had a pre-planned visit to the temple of Lord Venkateswara along with my maternal aunts Satyavati, Raja Kumari and sister-in-law Kranti. We met at Adduroad junction by 8:30. We took an auto rickshaw there and reached village Upamaka (via Nakkapalli) by 9:00. We bought Darshan tickets at the temple and embarked ourselves on the task of walking up the steep steps to reach God on the hill among black boulders. It would be a threat if one fails to be cautious while stepping up this hill. I saw the holy footprint of Lord Venkateswara on a boulder on this hill. The other footprint of this God can be found on the hill appearing from here in some distance on the other side. This God decided to stay on the seven hills of Tirupati after finding out that this hill trembled when He put His foot on it. A native worshipper told me about it. I plucked a stone (weighing about 50 grams) from a black boulder here to keep it with me as a representation of this God. For mainstream Hindus, God is omnipresent and omnipotent. This stone is sanctified being in the presence of this God for long. After the casual purchases in the annual fair down the hill opposite the main temple complex, we returned home by 12:00. Evening went to Adduroad and got two of my pants loosened at waist at a tailor. Night listened to Telugu cine songs. Went to sleep by 10:30.

23 March (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent most of the day at home. Watched World Cup on television for some time. The name of Lord Gopal follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 10:00.

24 March (Monday)

Woke up by 5:00. Took my aunt Satyavati and maternal grandmother to Adduroad by 7:00. Got them into a Rajahmundry bound Express bus. They get off it at Jaggampeta. My maternal grandmother has been staying here for the last two months. She lost her memory and is looking weak and pitiable. She led a very burdensome life. Resultantly she became mentally weak during the dusky moments of her life. She looked after all her children (two sons and four daughters, my mother being the eldest one) well. Now they don’t care her much. Went to the house of my uncle Srinu (his house can be reached by a two-minute walk from ours) by 9:00 and chewed two sugarcane sticks. Returned home by 11:00 and had my lunch. Again went to the same house by 12:00 with our tape recorder to play songs on it once the electricity was back. I played melodious Telugu cine songs on it from 1:00 to 3:15. It was very hot outside. So, resting in a cool place and listening to sweet songs matters a lot. My cousin Hari and I went searching for margosa sticks for my father. He brushes his teeth with them. We walked through the nearby groves from 3:30 to 4:00. Went to Adduroad and spent there till 5:30. Went to sleep by 10:30.

25 March (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Pulled water from the well, washed a pair of clothes and then went to Adduroad for scanning today’s dailies. The defense forces of the USA are moving ahead to occupy important regions in Iraq. Returned home by 9:30 and rested on bed. By 12:30 my friend (my colleague in Sri Prajna Junior College, teaching mathematics to students) came and asked me to write a complaint letter for him. Both of us sat in the junior college and finalized the two complaint letters. The issue is that, Vasudeva Rao, my friend (this one), of PNR Peta (Padma Naabha Raju Peta), was targeted by one of his villagers and was drawn into police station on fabricated charges. The sons of an old man in that village killed their father and put his dead body on the nearby railway track. They presented it as a suicide to outsiders. They did it to claim the insurance money of their father. They presented my colleague as the killer. I prepared two letters addressing the two offices (the head office and the branch office of Life Insurance Corporation of India) of the insurance company explaining them that it was a suicide (resorted to due to the frustration of the old man because of the abuse of his sons toward him) and not a murder. We appealed them not to pay the insurance money to the wicked sons of that old man. Later we got those letters typed up and laser printed in Tuni and posted them there. Returned home by 5:30. Night listened to Telugu cine songs. Went to sleep by 10:00.

26 March (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:00. Pulled water from the well. My uncle Chanti came to our house and asked me to send the photo of his daughter to my teacher uncle Venkata Rama Raju in Jaggampeta. He is mediating a marriage alliance on behalf of this party. I wrote a covering letter and enveloped the photo. Went to post office by 9:00 and posted it. Received my subscription copy of India Today. Spent reading it from 10:00 to 12:00. Then had my lunch and started to the house of my uncle Sagiraju Rama Raju at Raja Venkata Nagaram on my bicycle. Spent there from 1:00 to 4:00. My aunt Raja Kumari offered me some homemade eatables. My cousin Vasu is doing his first year Intermediate exams. Now he is preparing for his last paper (chemistry). It takes place on the 28th of this month. He is hopeful of getting not less than 65 pecentage of marks. My aunt prepared sweet milk porridge adding sago to it. I liked it. Reached public library in Koruprolu by 4:30. Spent there for half an hour. Returned home by 5:30. Called up my friend Veeranjaneyulu in Hyderabad. He is busy with his paintings. Night listened to my favorite Telugu cine songs on tape recorder. Went to sleep by 10:00.

27 March (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Pulled much water from our well for domestic use. Went to the house of my uncle Srinu by 7:30 and spent there till 9:00. Then went to Adduroad to scan today’s dailies. Had my lunch by 12:30 and decided to go to matinee. My cousin Hari and I reached cinema Venkatapathi Raju Mahal in Adduroad by 2:00. From 2:30 to 5:30 we saw the recently released Telugu film “Nuvve Nuvve”. It is one of the good films I have seen. It is a love story of youth presented in an exciting manner. An ordinary boy falls in love with a very rich and beautiful girl. The two lovers get closer in course of time. The boy can’t earn enough to foster the beauty of his beloved. The rich father of the girl hates the aimless and careless life of the boy. He brought up his daughter with love and money. He does not approve her love for such a worthless guy. He compels his daughter to marry a rich boy he chose. The desperate lover enters the scene during the marriage of his beloved with that rich boy and delivers powerful dialogues. Night slept in the thatched hut of my uncle Srinu (guarding it from thieves) along with my cousin Hari by 9:00.

28 March (Friday)

Woke up by 5:00. Pulled water from the well, washed a pair of clothes and then took a bath. Went to Adduroad by 8:00 to scan today’s dailies. Returned home by 9:30 and spent rest of my daytime with my uncle Srinu. I am 28 now. It is really testing time to bear the demands of age internally. My desire is to marry a very beautiful and educated girl. Even if I get a job in India, they don’t pay me much to look after my wife satisfactorily. That’s why I decided to go to Alaska to earn much. In my opinion, one should get married by 21 to enjoy one’s married life better. The present society and trends are moving it to beyond 30. I am one of those victims. I am wasting my age. Adults must marry early, beget children, bring them up and enjoy life in that order when they are vibrant and passionate in body and spirit. I don’t know why Lord Gopal is delaying my marriage. Night listened to songs. Went to sleep by 10:00. 

29 March (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Pulled water from the well. From 7:00 to 8:00 copied down some Telugu poems of the famous Telugu mythological drama “Satya Harishchandra” for my father from the original book into a notebook. By 10:00 took a bus from Adduroad to Narsipatnam. My aunt Raja Kumari was going to Peda Boddepalli to bring back their younger son Narendra Varma from the Andhra Pradesh Residential School (A P R School for Boys). He has been studying there for the last three years. I guided him in this respect. I am happy for it. His tenth standard annual exams end today. He is expecting distinction marks (above 75%). I advised him to try hard to get through the coming Polytechnic entrance test. He is an intelligent and disciplined student. I am proud of possessing such a brilliant cousin. We reached there by 12:00. His last exam ended by 2:00. He was happy to see us. We took our luggage and started to Peda Boddepalli Junction by 4:30. It rained a little before we had started. I saw a very beautiful girl there in a poor family. She is a perfect match for me. Orthodox Indian society condemns it because our communities are different. We returned home by 6:00. Went to sleep by 10:00.

30 March (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning spent reading newspapers. Afternoon spent at home casually. By 4:30 reached Zilla Parishad High School in Koruprolu on bicycle. Evening “Mandal Level Telugu Song Singing Competitions” are taking place here. All the participants are school children. They sang Telugu cine songs and the Keerthanas of the noted Telugu poet Annamacharya. Some girls are beautiful. They sang melodious Telugu cine songs. I cursed God. Why does not He give me a chance to love one of these girls and marry? I was not there till the end of this program. Returned home by 6:30. I pray Lord Gopal to guide me in a brilliant path. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Night listened to Telugu cine songs. Went to sleep by 10:00.

31 March (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Washed a pair of clothes. Got ready and left for Raja Venkata Nagaram by 8:30. Reached there by 9:00. I spent there from 9:00 to 3:30. Today I discussed with my uncle the plan I am going to follow to admit their son Naren into a coaching center at Visakhapatnam. He wants to get coaching for taking the entrance test into Polytechnic. I hope he gets a good job after completing his diploma. We decided to admit him into “Kumar Coaching Center” at N.A.D. Kotha Road. They have to pay 3000 rupees for his food and accommodation at this coaching center. The coaching goes on for about one month. For it, this morning my uncle brought money from the State Bank of India in village Gudivada, withdrawing it from his light savings account. They have been leading hard lives for long shouldering the responsibilities of educating their two children. Returned home by 4:30. Evening had a walk through Thimmapuram along with my friend Appalaraju. Night listened to Telugu cine songs. Went to sleep by 10:30.

1 April (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:00. From today I am subscribing to The Hindu. So, the paperboy delivered my copy this morning. Today is the last day of the present Telugu year. I am happy to enter the large world receiving this daily every morning. I take this newspaper as a classic piece. It is April Fools’ Day today. I fooled nobody and none acted so toward me on this occasion. There are many tasks to be attended by me. They don’t need the backing of observation of these superficial days. Morning spent much of my time reading the newspaper and lying myself on cot. Had my lunch by 12:00. Then went to the house of my aunt Subhadra. Spent watching their color television till 4:00. I watched parts of two telecasts. The Telugu feature film was “Talambralu” and the show was “Swara Sangamam” by Little Musicians’ Academy in Hyderabad. Night listened to songs on tape recorder for some time. Then went to Adduroad to listen to the Telugu cine songs sung by “Aamani Orchestra” of Kakinada. They organized it on a festive occasion. Went to sleep by 12:00.

2 April (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:00. Morning washed a pair of clothes. It’s joy to wash our clothes. Today is the first day of Telugu New Year “Swabhanu”. So, I had auspicious festive pickle (Ugadi Pachchadi) made of six items at home. My cousin Narendra Varma and I took a taxi at Adduroad by 8:00 and moved toward N.A.D. Kotha Road. Got down from it and walked toward Kumar Polytechnic Coaching Center where he had to be admitted for the intensive one-month coaching. It is said to be a good institute providing coaching for the CEEP (Common Entrance Examination into Polytechnic). I paid them 3000 rupees for his coaching, food and accommodation in this institute.  Gave him 300 rupees for his pocket money. I hope God blesses him with a good rank in the coming entrance test. Withdrew myself from that scene, took an Express bus bound to Kakinada and reached home by 2:00. Had my lunch and then scanned The Hindu. Then took a siesta till 4:00. Summer is torturing many. Went to Adduroad and spent there till 6:00. Night my sister-in-law Sandhya Rani called us up from Ambala Cantonment. Listened to songs. Went to sleep by 10:30.

3 April (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning scanned the English daily. Went to Adduroad by 8:30 to spend some time talking with my friend Dara Konda. We decided to go to see a film. We went to cinema Lakshmipati Raju Mahal and found that our expected film was not on. We wanted to see an English film of stunts. Returned home by 12:00 and had my lunch. Took a siesta for 90 minutes. Went to Prajna Junior College to meet my friend Dara Konda. We went to cinema Venkatapathi Raju Mahal and saw the Telugu film “Eeswar” of Prabhash. Returned home by 5:30 and knew from my father that the folks of M.S.R. International in Secunderabad called up. They informed him to tell me to contact them immediately. I rushed to Adduroad and called them up. They informed me to meet them tomorrow morning in their office. Took a bus from Adduroad to Payakaraopeta. Thence walked to the APSRTC Bus Depot in Tuni. There I waited for my expected bus for more than 90 minutes. Took Visakhapatnam-Hyderabad Hi-tech bus of APSRTC by 9:00. It is a long journey. I enjoyed it.

4 April (Friday)

Got off the bus at Mahatma Gandhi Bus Complex. Thence took a city bus up to Secunderabad. Ate my breakfast in a hotel, had two glasses of sugarcane juice and then rushed to the office of M.S.R. International. I waited there for three hours. Then its managing director M S Raju came. They collected 3150 rupees from me toward charges for the medical test needed for my visa processing to the U.S.A. Took leave of him and went to the abode of Veeranjaneyulu by 6:00. He was alone and busy with his paintings. He is a great artist. He is not being promoted by sponsors to go abroad. Ordinary artists are earning a lot of money and fame through their exhibitions in the European countries due to their publicity and mobility supported by their well-wishers. He is modest and conservative. Now he is trying hard to marry a beautiful girl. Present materialists never recognize great men like him. He prepared delicious supper. We had it by 9:30. Night we slept on the terrace enjoying the spell of breezes. Went to sleep by 11:30.

5 April (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:00. Got ready soon and left the abode of Veeru by 7:00 for Secunderabad. Took an auto rickshaw to Serilingampally and thence a city bus to Secunderabad. They (folks of M.S.R. International) told us to come there with an empty stomach for medical tests. Entered C.D.R. Hospital opposite Manju Theatre by 9:00. We were 14 candidates in total meant to be sent to Alaska for the job of fish packaging. We must undergo these medical tests for visa purpose. They collected samples of our blood and urine. Other tests we underwent were electrocardiography, ultrasound scan of abdomen, X-ray and tuberculosis. It was all over by 11:00. I went to the office of M.S.R. International by 1:00 after having a plate of vegetable biryani at Hotel Padmaja opposite Secunderabad railway station. Left that office by 4:00 and then moved to the abode of Veeranjaneyulu at Doyen’s Colony. Evening we went to cinema Sridevi in Serilingampally and saw the Telugu film “Run”. I liked the heroine in this film a lot. She is an angel of beauty. Only lucky boys get such a wife. May God bless me with such an angel. Went to sleep by 11:30.

6 April (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:00. Spent most of my time within the rented house portion of Veeranjaneyulu. Afternoon went to Serilingampally and bought vegetables for him. I wanted to see a Telugu film. It turned cloudy. Meanwhile strong winds joined the climate. It started raining soon. Returned to the abode of Veeru by 2:30. The name of Lord Gopal follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 11:00.

7 April (Monday)

Woke up by 5:00. Got ready soon and took leave of my friend Veeranjaneyulu to go to Secunderabad. Took an auto rickshaw and a bus and reached Patny Center by 8:00. Had my breakfast in a roadside hotel there. I wondered to find that the hotelier served me five purees for six rupees. The quality of the items was extraordinary. It is a very affordable price for many. May God bless that hotel and its people. Went into C.D.R. Hospital and got my hand checked (they marked with a pen on my hand yesterday and told me to keep that part of my hand beyond touch of water until it is tested by them this morning) for the identity of tuberculosis. I knew that all the tests conducted upon me showed normalcy along with my other associates. Then I went out in search of a cinema to see some film for spending my time. I ended up at cinema Anjani. There I saw the Telugu film “Oka Raatri”. Then walked to Hotel Padmaja opposite Secunderabad railway station. Had my lunch (a plate of vegetable biryani) there for 14 rupees. Then walked to the office of M.S.R. International to talk with Anuradha (the receptionist) about the details regarding my fish packing job in Alaska. Then took Visakha Express at Secunderabad railway station for Tuni. I got a comfortable seat. Enjoyed a happy journey.

8 April (Tuesday)

Got up from the window seat in the general compartment of Visakha Express by 5:30 to get down on to the platform at Tuni railway station. Washed my dim face at a tap with a little piece of soap (I carried it in my pocket) and then walked toward the bus complex in Payakaraopeta. Thence took a taxi for Adduroad. Reached home by 7:30 in a rickshaw from Adduroad. Took a bath, dressed up myself and then scanned the five copies of The Hindu of the last five days. Had my breakfast by 8:30 and rested for two hours. Had my lunch by 12:30 and spent watching television. Watched parts of some Telugu serials and a bit of Telugu feature film “Bottu Kaatuka”. The scheduled power cut occurred by 4:00. Went to Adduroad by 4:30 to spend observing the movements of people. Thence moved to Koruprolu to meet the cashew merchant Sudharshanam (the business partner of cashew merchant Venkata Rao in this village) and ask him about his ability to lend us. He said he can’t. Now I have to pay 1, 45,000 rupees to M S Raju of the consultancy. After this payment, I may fly to Alaska in the second week of next month. Evening called up my uncle Narasimha Murthy in Tetagunta to enquire him about the availability of money from his acquaintances in that village. Night listened to songs. Went to sleep by 10:30.

9 April (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:00. This morning I had to go to the house of my younger paternal grandfather Narayana Murthy Raju (father of my uncle Srinu) in the coconut garden at village Lakshmi Puram and bring (borrowing) 10000 rupees from him. My father did not approve my trip today. So, I did not attend this work. Scanned the English daily and then went to post office. Received my copy of India Today and the envelope from my brother Srinivas with a DD worth 1800 rupees meant for the clearance of his monthly chit payment due here. Went to State Bank of India in Etikoppaka by 10:00 and encashed that DD. Returned home by 11:30. Spent watching television from 12:00 to 4:00. It looks good staying indoors when it is very hot outside. Went to Adduroad by 4:30 to get my recently purchased flip-flops mended by a cobbler. He charged 15 rupees for it. This is the quality of footwear some companies manufacture now. One has to go to a cobbler soon after buying the stuff from a store. Night contacted some people that promised to lend us money. Listened to Telugu cine songs. Went to sleep by 10:00.

10 April (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned the English daily. Left for the house of my paternal grandfather Narayana Murthy Raju in an auto rickshaw from Adduroad. Reached their thatched hut in Lakshmi Puram by 8:30. They talked affectionately with me for one hour. Borrowed 10000 rupees from him as a short-term loan at a monthly interest rate of two rupees per 100 rupees. Returned home by 10:30. My uncle Narasimha Murthy came here by 11:00 from Tetagunta. Earlier he assured us of arranging a loan of 50,000 rupees. So, we are utilizing his contribution to pay the consultancy. I already paid 70,000 rupees to them. The total amount of money to be paid by me is 2, 10,000 rupees. This is the money I am spending to go to Alaska for the job of fish packaging. Both of us left for Raja Venkata Nagaram by 12:30 on two bicycles. He went away with one of his acquaintances in between. I resumed my journey to the house of my uncle Rama Raju. Spent there till 4:00. Came back to Adduroad by 4:30 and rang up my sister-in-law Sandhya Rani in Ambala Cantonment to inform her about my journey to Alaska soon. By 5:30 had my haircut at my favorite salon in Adduroad. My brother Srinivas called us up from Ambala Cantonment by 8:30. Went to sleep by 10:30.

11 April (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Took my cousin Hari to Adduroad by 7:00 to get him into a bus for his summer holiday trip to his home in village Tank Bead. It arrived by 7:30. Returned home by 8:30 and scanned The Hindu. I could find out the name of the heroine in the recently released Telugu film “Run”. It is Meera Jasmine. What a lovely name to such a beautiful girl? I like to marry a girl like her. All these pretty girls revolve around the film industry which is largely filled with dishonesty and immorality these days. Admiration of beauty is part of human life. Beauty activates the spirit of man to live longer in the shadows of oblivion. I want to be related with such female beauty which is inspiring and sensitive. Beauty does not enjoy its due recognition and appreciation unless it falls in the premises of admiration of admirers like me. Meera Jasmine is a distant dream for me. Time and poverty are killing my age and its obsessions. May Lord Gopal direct my life as He wishes. Went to sleep by 10:30.

12 April (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Pulled water from the well. Scanned the English daily for some time. Went to our village Panchayat office by 8:30 to pay our monthly electricity bill. Went to the house of my uncle Srinu to take their electricity bill and pay it because he was busy in another activity now. Went to Adduroad by 9:00 to scan today’s Telugu dailies. Returned home by 10:00 and rested for a while. Then went to Prajna Junior College to spend talking with my colleagues there. Concluded this discussion by 12:00 and returned home to have my lunch. Spent watching television till 4:00. During these sultry days, it is nice to stay indoors and be entertained watching the attractive weekend programs on the idiot box. Went to Adduroad by 4:15 and spent there till 6:00. For the last one year, I have been enjoying the holidays blest by my Lord Krishna. Thank you very much dear Gopal for giving me that many holidays. Night listened to Telugu cine songs. Went to sleep by 10:30.

13 April (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent most of my time at home. This morning and evening two creatures died at our house. I am disturbed about it. I pray my Lord Gopal asking Him to bless their souls. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 9:00 with sad thoughts.

14 April (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. The deaths of two creatures at our house yesterday, heavily hit my soul today. So, I spent all the day at home without going out. Yesterday morning an eagle carried our pet chick away. It was very friendly with me. It used to climb up my shoulders without fear. Such brilliant friend of mine traveled far away from me with the inescapable call of God. Once a highly befriended creature is lost, nobody can solace one’s distressed heart. Nobody can bring it back. The suffering of fellow living creatures is irrelevant to a hungry eagle. The male calf of our buffalo, six months old, died yesterday evening by 6:30. I tried hard at the eleventh hour to save it bringing a veterinary assistant from Koruprolu to get it treated. It died by the time we arrived. The untimely death of this little creature is due to the attack of tetanus, a frequenter to innocent animals. Its mother is crying in vain. I was deeply touched empathizing with the suffering of that innocent creature. Nobody can assess the depth of pain of a bereaved animal. Went to sleep by 10:00 with a heavy heart.

15 April (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned the English daily. Went to Adduroad by 8:30 to scan the Telugu dailies. Went to Prajna Junior College by 10:30 to spend talking with my colleagues there. Returned home by 12:00 and had my lunch. Watched two English feature films on Axion television channel from 12:30 to 4:00. The second one was “Blazing”. Went to Adduroad by 4:30 to spend talking with my friends at the hotel of our friend Appalaraju. By 5:30 my uncle Srinu came there. Both of us walked to the nearby Lorry Supply Office to spend there for some time. Returned home by 6:30. Today’s miracle is that our recently lost chick was brought back home by a girl in our vicinity. She chased the villainous eagle and liberated the poor creature from its claws. This chick was colored red. It is an orphan. My cousin Hari brought it to our house some days ago. I pray God to bless it with a long life. Last night my friend Lahari visited me in my dream. Went to sleep by 10:00.

16 April (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:00. Got ready soon and left for Narsipatnam Road railway station by 6:15. As planned earlier, my friend Dara Konda too reached the station by 6:45. We took Kakinada-Visakhapatnam passenger and reached Visakhapatnam by 9:15. We took an auto rickshaw and reached the Non-technical District Employment Exchange. I had my employment card renewed without getting my B.A. and M.A. qualifications added to it knowing that I don’t get a job through it. We collected our renewed employment cards in one hour’s time. Thence we went to B III Section in Andhra University to do work of my friend. Thence we took a bus to Bheemunipatnam (also called Bheemili). My friend submitted his DIET (District Institute for Education and Training) application form there by 1:00. Then we had our lunch in Kalinga Garden Hotel. We returned to the bus complex in Visakhapatnam by 4:00. We walked toward railway station. On the way, we had a glass of grape juice at an unbelievable price of five rupees (compared to its quantity and quality). We took Visakhapatnam-Rajahmundry passenger train. Reached home by 8:30. Went to sleep by 10:00.

17 April (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Today my concentration was focused on a single issue. Sekhar (Sagi Naga Raju), the son of my uncle Chanti, was recently beaten by one of our Kshatriya folks in Raja Venkata Nagaram. This innocent boy (aged about 18) was beaten with a stick by the villain of the episode. The villain was collecting cashew nuts from under the trees of this innocent hero. When the hero questioned the villain’s unethical act, the latter beat the prior. This dispute took place on a single day. We, the team of hero party, 12 in all, gathered at the house of my uncle Rama Raju in Raja Venkata Nagaram by 6:30 in the evening. We discussed our strategy of passive resistance and then moved to the house of Soori Raju (Datla Surya Narayana Raju), the cunning director of Kshatriya community in this nasty village. The assembled men of both the parties amount to about 20. The heated up debate and the minor exchange of abusive words took place between 8:00 and 10:30. The villain party apologized to the hero party toward the end. We could easily smell the pre-planned strategy of the villain party. They exhibited hypocrisy in their words. Went to sleep by 12:30.

18 April (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned the English daily. Left for our mango grove by 8:00 on my bicycle. Gave vegetables to the supervisor of our mango garden. Walked through mango and cashew trees. I noticed that only one cashew tree in the grove bore crop in this season. En route visited my paternal grandparents and found them pitiable. Reached home by 11:30. Getting ready with my luggage, preparation of Rasna water to be had during the bus journey and having my lunch were over by 1:00. Rested on bed from 1:30 to 3:30. Got ready by 4:30 for our journey to Hyderabad. I was affected with low fever this afternoon due to cycling fast in the sun. My brother Sambha and I reached Adduroad by 5:30. Thence we took a taxi and reached the bus complex in Tuni by 6:15. Visakhapatnam-Hyderabad Hi-tech bus arrived by 7:15. Both of us got comfortable seats in it. They put on Telugu feature film “Muraari” on television in it. I felt cold due to low fever in me. I hardly slept during this journey.

19 April (Saturday)

Got up by 9:00 from the seat of the bus at Mahatma Gandhi Bus Complex in Hyderabad. Thence we took a city bus up to Bala Nagar. From there we took an auto rickshaw and reached Serilingampally by 10:30. We reached the abode of my friend Veeranjaneyulu by 12:00. We freshened up ourselves by 12:30. I took a tablet after having bread dipped in hot milk. Rested on a mat from 1:00 to 3:00. Then we refreshed ourselves and started to Secunderabad. We took an auto rickshaw to Serilingampally, a city bus from there and reached the office of M.S.R. International by 5:00. M S Raju, the managing director of this consultancy, came by 5:30. He called us into his room. We interacted with him for ten minutes. Then we paid him the balance amount of money that is 1, 30,000 rupees. With this, we paid him 2, 00,000 rupees for his service to get me a fish packing job in Alaska. We returned to the abode of Veeru by 8:00. We had our supper by 9:00. Went to sleep by 10:00 on the terrace.

20 April (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. My brother Sambha and I spent within the abode of Veeru till 1:00. By 1:30 we left for Kothi by a bus from the HCU Bus Depot. There my brother bought a fancy handbag for his wife Kranti. Thence we moved to Mahatma Gandhi Bus Complex in an auto rickshaw. I filled cool water into a bottle for him in this bus complex. I got him into Hyderabad-Visakhapatnam Hitech bus. I bought the ticket for him. Took leave of him by 3:30 and reached the abode of Veeru by 5:30 by a Veera bus. It was very hot outside. I am frequently drinking water to save myself from this summer. We had our supper and went to Serilingampally by 10:00 in an auto rickshaw. Our other friends joined us there. We saw the Telugu film “Amma Naanna O Tamila Ammaayi” in cinema Sridevi in the second show. It is very good. We returned to Veeru’s abode by 1:30. The name of Lord Gopal follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 2:00.

21 April (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Had my breakfast by 8:30 prepared by domestic (a small girl). Went to HCU campus by 10:00 to meet my friend Colin. We spent talking for a while at Student Center Canteen. Then he went away to attend his girlfriend. I went to Department of English and met Sudhakar Marathe, Syed Mujeebuddin, Mohan Ramanan, Narayana Chandran and Pingali Sailaja. Spent talking with my friend Samanta Sahu in his hostel room till 1:30. Then talked with my M.A. classmate Manohar Babu for some time. Then Colin and I went to the small canteen at Shopping Complex and had our lunch (a plate of vegetable biryani). Then we went to the abode of Veeranjaneyulu and had a soft drink. Thence we moved to Chanda Nagar and posed for a photograph in the studio of Sai Preet Color Lab. This photo remains as a token of our friendship. He dropped me at Doyen’s Colony and left for his rented abode by 6:00. I went to Sai Preet Color Lab by 8:30 and collected the photo. It came well. Had my supper by 9:30. It was beautiful outside with moonlight. Went to sleep by 10:00.

22 April (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Had my breakfast by 8:30 prepared by my friend Veeru. Moved to State Bank of India, Hyderabad University Campus branch, by 10:30 and talked with its branch manager about money transfer from the United States. Came back to my friend’s abode. Went to HCU campus by 12:00. My M.A. hostel mate Degala Ravi Kumar joined me by 1:00. Both of us went to Men’s Hostel “F” on his bike to meet Bhayya. By 2:00 we left for the city by bus. We got down from it at some place and took an auto rickshaw up to Big Bazar in Abids. We bought a black trolley bag (AUK) for air travel, two Turkish towels, a photo album and a Sony Walkman there. In its adjacent small shop down there we bought a BRUT deodorant and a Citizen calculator (meant for counting my large amounts of money going to be earned through my fish packaging job in Alaska). We hired two auto rickshaws to bring my luggage to HCU campus. We spent 150 rupees for these two vehicles and reached the campus by 5:00. Ravi Kumar dropped me at my friend’s abode on his bike. Went to Serilingampally by 6:30 and bought four shirts and three pants at a Kumar Showroom. I spent 1200 rupees for it. I also bought an Eveready battery charger, two empty audio cassettes of Sony Company and two small locks. Had my supper by 9:30. Went to sleep by 11:30.

23 April (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Had my breakfast by 8:00 and rested for some time. Stepped out by 10:00 and reached the State Bank of India near HCU main gate by 10:30. Got the record of my recent transactions printed on my passbook. Thence my friend Colin and I went into the HCU campus on his Enfield bike. We had ice cream and sugarcane juice at Shopping Complex. He dropped me at Veeru’s abode by 12:30. I went to Gulmohar Park area to get my passport size photos developed and buy vegetables. Returned to Veeru’s abode by 1:30. We had our lunch by 2:00. I went to Serilingampally by 2:30 to get my favorite Telugu cine songs recorded into four one-hour long audio cassettes at an audio shop. This recording went on for three hours. I bought a black Aristocrat briefcase in a store there. I had four glasses of sugarcane juice. Sultry weather hit me hard. Came back to Veeru’s abode by 9:30. We did not have the mood to cook food for us. We had afternoon’s rice with curd. Listened to my newly recorded Telugu cine songs for some time. Went to sleep by 12:30.

24 April (Thursday)

Woke up by 6:00. Had my breakfast by 8:30. Freshened up myself by 10:00. My friend Veeranjaneyulu asked me to think about titles for six of his creative paintings which he wants to send for a scholarship. I took one hour to suggest titles for them and describe them briefly. These paintings are related to the artist’s imagination of the portrait coming to life to live with him learning that art and consoling him in his old age (his painting of a beautiful woman transforming itself into a beautiful woman pitying his solitary life as an artist and coexisting with him till his death consoling him as his lifelong admirer). Took leave of him by 11:30. Hired an auto rickshaw for me for 100 rupees up to Mahatma Gandhi Bus Complex. We started by 12:00. He dropped me at my destination by 12:40 only. This auto rickshaw driver is a very active and experienced guy. I feared the eventualities on the road observing his challenging spirit among chasing vehicles. I prayed God. Put my luggage in the cloakroom at the bus complex and walked a little to have my lunch in Hotel Nandini (Lahari’s name in Telugu film “Indra”). Visakhapatnam bound Hitech bus started off by 3:30. A very beautiful girl of 12 (I guessed her age. She slaps me if I ask her for it) adorned my front seat. My journey was sanctified. They put on Telugu feature film “Samara Simha Reddy” on television. Our bus reached Vijayawada by 10:30.

25 April (Friday)

The beautiful girl moved to the other side of her mother before sleeping. Indian parents never leave their daughters to be admired by unfamiliar dreamers like me. I turned conscious by the time the bus entered the long bridge above the river Godavari. I doubted the controlling power of the bus driver to withstand temptation of sleep during those late night hours. About 60 confident passengers were happily sleeping in their comfortable seats. The beautiful girl and her parents got off our bus at Annavaram. Thereby an episode of platonic relationship ended between us. All these journeys symbolize the temporary pleasures of human beings in the magic land set and managed by God. Got off the bus at Adduroad by 7:15. Hired a rickshaw and reached home by 7:30. Freshened up myself and scanned the recent copies of The Hindu. Then rested for two hours. Listened to the recently recorded Telugu cine songs on our tape recorder from 12:00 to 4:00. Night too did the same for some time. Went to sleep by 10:00.

26 April (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned the English daily. Went to Adduroad by 9:00 and sat at my friend’s hotel for some time talking with him. Went to Prajna Junior College by 10:30 to spend talking with my colleagues for some time. They asked me to treat them on the occasion of my eventual journey to Alaska for the job. I agreed for it. Returned home by 12:30 and had my lunch. Watched television for some time. Went to Adduroad by 1:30. A customer brought back the tent house material. I saw that it was put inside before moving to cinema Venkatapathiraju Mahal. My brother Sambha and I saw the Telugu film “Khadgam” directed by Krishna Vamsy. This film portrays clashes between Muslims and Hindus in India. Nationality and patriotism are expected from Muslims in India when they come across the Pakistan-sponsored terrorists in their places. I liked the melody, essence and the picturization of the song “Nuvvu Nuvvu” in this film. It is one of my most favorite Telugu cine songs. Evening took our tape recorder to Sridhar Electronics in Adduroad to get its recording facility repaired. It failed recently. I was with this mechanic till 9:30. Had my supper by 10:30. Went to sleep by 11:30.

27 April (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. In today’s Telugu daily Vaartha, I saw the photo of Lahari along with a kid. It’s an ad. It was printed on the front cover of its Sunday supplement. She looked beautiful in this ad. I wanted to do something for her. Returned home from Adduroad and wrote a piece of poetry in Telugu appreciating her. By 1:00 took a bus from Adduroad and left for Payakaraopeta. From 2:00 to 8:00 attended the work of preparing a memento for Lahari. I spent 400 rupees for it. Returned home by 10:00 by bus. Had my supper by 11:00. The name of Lord Gopal follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 12:00.

28 April (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. This early morning my brother Sambha left for West Bengal in the lorry with the load of mangoes. This year he bought the seasonal crop of our mango grove. I had a little sweet and went to Adduroad by 9:00. Scanned today’s Eenadu at my familiar shop. Then went to my friend’s hotel and spent talking with him for some time. Thence moved to Prajna Junior College to meet my colleagues. Today is the last working day for school children in this college. So, my colleagues were relieved of that facet of their daily college work burden. We spent talking a lot about various funny things related to this college. Then I took them to Hotel Sowjanya to treat them as decided earlier. Chicken biryani was served to those three. Then took them for grape juice. I spent 100 rupees for this little party. I felt happy. From 1:30 to 4:30 spent at the tent house listening to the recently recorded Telugu cine songs on our tape recorder. Came back to home by 6:30. My cousin Narendra Varma too spent with me this afternoon. Night listened to songs on tape recorder. Went to sleep by 10:00.

29 April (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned the English daily. Reading newspaper took place in Adduroad as I found it inconvenient at home due to the aggressive talking nature of my father. Went to post office by 8:30 to talk with the postman about the non-delivery of my recent copies of India Today. This idiot did not come by then. Went to our mango grove by 9:20 on my bicycle. Went to some mango trees to check under them for the ripe fruit they dropped. They dropped none. My uncle Narayana Murthy offered me one mango fruit at his abode. I inaugurated eating mangoes in this season. My aunt Kumari offered me lunch. Went back to our mango grove by 2:30. My paternal grandfather Thammi Raju and I spent talking for one hour. He narrated his experiences. I found them very interesting. I collected raw mangoes for preparing pickle by 4:00 and started back to home. Went to Adduroad by 5:30 to get the memento to Lahari (her real name is Lakshmi) packed decoratively at Bhavani Fancy Shop. After that I packed it well and made it fit for postal dispatch. Night listened to Telugu cine songs on tape recorder. Went to sleep by 10:00.

30 April (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned The Hindu. Went to Adduroad by 8:30 to scan Eenadu. Went to post office by 9:30 to get my copies of India Today. The latest copy was sent to some other post office. After the redirection from there, it came to this one. I took the charge of tent house today. My duty hours were from 9:30 to 12:00 and again from 12:30 to 6:30. Afternoon spent talking with my friend Dara Konda for some time. We decided to go to Visakhapatnam soon to clear our pending works there. He has to obtain his M.A. certificate from the Andhra University. I have to buy some company recorded audio cassettes of classic Telugu cine songs. We finalized our date of journey. Afternoon listened to Telugu cine songs on our tape recorder. Today it was very hot. Evening wrote a letter of enquiry for one of my colleagues at Prajna Junior College. Returned home by 6:30. My uncle Srinu spent talking with us for some time. Night listened to Telugu cine songs. Went to sleep by 10:30.

1 May (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning ironed a pair of clothes. From today my subscription was moved to the Telugu daily Eenadu from the English daily The Hindu. Went to Adduroad by 8:30 and had a plate of puree at my friend’s hotel. Sat there for some time talking with my friend, enjoying the air blowing toward us from the open. Today it is May Day. So, they closed their retail stores in Adduroad fearing the inspector’s visit. My cousin Narendra Varma came here by 10:30 on my invitation. Today the Andhra Pradesh government released the results of the tenth standard examinations to the media. So, he had to check his fate. We tried to find his marks on the Internet but in vain. His A P R School authorities too failed to reach him his marks over telephone when he enquired in that direction. We spent watching television from 12:30 to 4:00. I watched part of Telugu feature film “Eenadu” during this time. Evening we checked the special edition of a local daily and found that Naren passed in first class. I went to Koruprolu by 5:00 along with my friends to visit a temple there. Night listened to the recently recorded Telugu cine songs. Went to sleep by 10:30.

2 May (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned Eenadu. Felt weak due to last night’s sleeplessness. So, rested on bed till 9:00. Then went to Adduroad to breathe polluted air by others. Spent some time at the tent house. Came back to home by 12:00 and had my lunch. Watched the Axion television channel from 1:00 to 2:00. Went to Adduroad by 2:15 to see a Telugu film. As scheduled earlier, my friend Ramesh joined me later in the cinema before the show began. We saw “Shiva Rama Raju”. This film highlights the sensitivity and depth of familial bonds among two brothers and their sister. I liked it. We crave for watching films based on great human relationships when we can’t find them in the society around us. People are living mechanical and automated lives now. Films entertain them and relieve them from their daily burdens of life and profession. I am a victim of this materialistic society. Bachelorhood is a curse to disciplined and refined youth. Came back to home by 6:00. My brother Sambha returned from his tour to West Bengal in the lorry of load of mangoes. He is not happy with the prices of mangoes traders paid him there. Night listened to songs. Went to sleep by 10:00.

3 May (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned Eenadu. Spent all the day at home. From 12:00 to 4:00 kept on listening to Telugu cine songs on tape recorder and at the same time wrote two letters. One is to my friend Colin Leslie Kelman and the other one is to Reader Pingali Sailaja. Each letter has four pages. My letter to Colin explains my assessment of his individual qualities and a wish for his bright future. I warned him to be careful with manipulative girls before getting locked in the fetters of marriage. Values last longer than the showy beauty of women. The trend of today’s modern women is to look attractive to everybody. Many of them don’t know how to use their liberty achieved after centuries of slavery and gloom in the male dominated society. My letter to Reader Sailaja presents my experiences on the HCU campus and my desire to be the follower of her ideals. This is my first formal letter to her seeking her blessings as her student. From 5:00 to 6:30 engaged myself in digging holes in the front yard of our house to put poles in them for the arrangement of shade sheets on them soon. I worked hard. Night listened to songs. Went to sleep by 10:00.

4 May (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. By 8:00 left for Payakaraopeta by a bus from Adduroad. Spent there from 9:00 to 5:00. First got two letters and 50 letterheads typed up and printed at Manikanta Computer Center. From 2:00 to 5:00 did a little shopping. Returned home by 6:00. Night listened to Telugu cine songs on tape recorder. The name of Lord Gopal follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 10:00.

5 May (Monday)

Woke up by 5:00. Got ready soon. Left for NRPM railway station by 6:15 on my bicycle. Took Kakinada-Visakhapatnam passenger and reached Visakhapatnam by 9:30. Posted the two letters to my friend Colin and Reader Sailaja at the post office in railway station. Hired an auto rickshaw and went to Jagadamba Junction. Booked the memento of Telugu poetry to Lahari at “Speed and Safe Courier Center” for its dispatch to their home in Vijayawada. Then went to Music World store and bought 14 company recorded audio cassettes of Telugu cine songs for 600 rupees. Thence rushed to cinema Ramadevi and saw the English feature film “Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets-Part II” in the morning show. It is a marvel. Had my lunch at Hotel Sree Aruna. Left Jagadamba Junction by 2:30 for the railway station. Waited for my expected train for three hours on the platform. I liked an old man who talked with me for some time. He was poor and pitiable. I gave him 25 rupees. Took Visakhapatnam-Rajahmundry passenger train. Reached home by 7:45. Listened to songs. Went to sleep by 10:30.

6 May (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned Eenadu. Went to Nakkapalli by 9:00 to get my educational certificates photocopied. Got it done at the Xerox Center opposite the bus complex. Came back to home by 10:30. Had my lunch by 12:00. Started to Adduroad by 12:30. Took a bus for Tuni by 1:00 along with my cousin Narendra Varma. We started to the house of our maternal grandparents in Gollalagunta. We took an ordinary bus to Jaggampeta by 2:30. Got off it there by 4:30. We went to the house of my teacher uncle Venkata Rama Raju from there keeping our luggage of two bags in the hotel at bus complex. We spent talking with him till 6:00. In this conversation, I talked about my journey to Alaska soon, the redirection of my India Today subscription copies to his address from the 20th of this month, the point of Naren’s admission into a good polytechnic college and other domestic issues. We took leave of him and left for Gollalagunta in an auto rickshaw by 6:30. We reached the house of my uncle Varma by 7:00. My cousin Anantha Lakshmi prepared hot food for us. We spent talking for some time. Went to sleep by 9:30.

7 May (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. The house of my uncle is beautiful with mango trees around. The guava and papaya trees are also an addition of beauty. There is no scarcity of drinking water for people or cattle. The only demerit of this family is that recently a rift took place between my uncle Krishnam Raju and my cousin Anantha Lakshmi. Eventually he started cooking on his own. Our relatives began to find fault with her blaming her disobedience toward her helpless brother-in-law. I spent lazily till 9:30. Meanwhile my cousin Murali came. Then I freshened up myself to go to the houses of familiar ones in this village. After visiting other houses, I went to the house of my eldest maternal grandfather Appala Raju (the eldest brother of my grandfather Subba Raju) and spent there till 12:30. He narrated us his experiences of poverty and difficulties in the past. I was very interested in his precious talk. Had my lunch by 1:00. Rested for some time in the shade of a mango tree. Went to our mango grove by 4:30. We had cool palmyra nut juice there. Night the mother of my cousin Murali prepared and served supper for Naren and me. We spent talking for some time after supper. Went to sleep by 10:00.

8 May (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent much of my time at home. I am eating many mango fruit. My cousin Murali came by 9:30. We spent talking for one hour. Recently he joined a spiritual organization and acquired a lot of spirituality. I am happy to observe his knowledge of man’s relation with God and the system of purification of soul attainable through meditation and self-regulation. Had my lunch by 12:30. Started to Jaggampeta by 2:00. Took an auto rickshaw by 2:15 and reached the bus complex in Jaggampeta by 3:00. Bought one kilo of sweets and took the ordinary bus for Molleru Mallavaram. It is a new bus and looked attractive. I was happy to sit in the bus going to the village of my sister-in-law Sandhya Rani. Reached their home by 4:00. My sister-in-law Sowjanya’s husband Datla Ramesh is also here. She is expecting her baby in a month’s time. This place is very near to Bhoopatipalem where I studied from my eighth standard to tenth standard. I heard that it lost its standards and reputation as a great school now. Spent talking with folks here for some time. Went to sleep by 9:30 in the moonlight.

9 May (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Freshened up myself and started listening to Telugu cine songs on tape recorder. I bought this tape recorder in Hyderabad once and presented it to Sowjanya on the occasion of her marriage. It is not from a good company. Some local nuts made it. It is not functioning well. I regretted it. Played it for the sake of it. By 10:30 a parrot-wizard (a fortune-teller) came with his parrot. I too asked him to examine my future. He said that everything goes on well in my future. I felt happy with the prediction of the parrot. Played Astaa Chemma with Sowjanya for two hours at a bet of one rupee or two rupees per game. She won four rupees from me by end. Spent talking with my uncle Uppalapati Krishnam Raju from 2:00 to 4:00. He is also interested in sending his son Raja to Alaska on my advice after going there and experiencing that work environment. My brother-in-law Raja reached me to Ramula Devapuram (Tank Bead) on scooter by 6:00. The road was bumpy and dusty. My last visit is to the house of my uncle Rama Krishnam Raju in this village in this tour. My maternal grandmother is staying here now. Went to sleep by 9:30.

10 May (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Freshened up myself by 8:30. My aunt Satyavati prepared Milk Kova for me. Two of her relatives in this village gave her cow milk for it. This aunt is famous for preparing all kinds of dishes in our circle of relatives. Went to the house of my aunt Venu by 9:00 to spend talking with her and watching their television for some time. She told me about the burning issue (the ugliness of road to their village from village Molleru) in this village due to the ignorance and negligence of the villagers. She asked me to complain on behalf of the villagers to the concerning authorities and try to resolve it as early as possible. I promised her that I would deal with the issue through correspondence soon. Took leave of her and went to the house of the parents of my aunt Kumari by 11:00. They were engaged in the seasonal activity of preparing mango pickles for their domestic consumption. They did not pay much attention to my casual visit. I too did not expect courtesy from them finding them busy in that work. Thence went to the house of my aunt Raja Kumari (the sister of my uncle Rama Krishnam Raju in this village). Had my lunch by 1:00. Afternoon spent all my time in the house of my uncle. My maternal grandmother is doing well due to the devoted care of this aunt. Went to sleep by 9:00 in the moonlight.

11 May (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Took leave of all and left for Molleru by 9:30 along with my cousins Hari and Kavita in a bullock cart. I enjoyed this journey. I pitied the strain of bullocks pulling the cart. For ages, man has been torturing them for his pleasures and agriculture. Only God has to help them in facing their difficulties. We took a bus in Molleru by 10:30 for Jaggampeta. We reached Jaggampeta by 11:20. We waited for my uncle Varma to come from Gollalagunta. Meanwhile I made my cousins Hari and Kavita sit in the bus complex and went to a nearby shop by the road. Bought a half kilo Horlicks bottle for 106 rupees to send for my eldest maternal grandfather Appala Raju in Gollalagunta. Returned soon to the bus complex. My uncle Varma came in the meantime. He brought some luggage to be taken to my home by me. I gave him 500 rupees asking him to give it to my maternal grandmother Buchchiyyamma. Gave 100 rupees to my cousin Hari as a gesture of my affection for him. Took an ordinary bus for Tuni. Reached there by 2:00. Thence took a Visakhapatnam bound express bus and reached Adduroad by 3:30. Carried out a small work till the evening. Night a clash took place between my father and me. I was upset. Listened to Telugu cine songs on tape recorder for some time. Went to sleep by 11:00.

12 May (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned Eenadu. Went to Adduroad by 8:00 to feel the air of my acquaintances there. Spent at home from 10:30 to 11:30 reading the daily. Then called up my friend Veeranjaneyulu in Hyderabad and asked him to enquire about the arrival of visa for my journey to Alaska at M.S.R. International in Secunderabad. After some time, he reached me the information provided by Anuradha that M S Raju, the managing director of consultancy, went to Chennai for the stamping of our visas at U.S. Consulate. According to her, the probability is that we may leave for Alaska by the 20th of this month. I felt satisfied with this piece of news. From 12:00 to 4:00 listened to my favorite Telugu cine songs on tape recorder at high volume. It is a great entertainment reforming my life. Went to Adduroad by 4:00 and bought some items at Vasavi Sri Lakshmi Cloth Store spending 621 rupees. Thence went to a fancy store and bought some items worth 244 rupees. Night listened to Telugu cine songs. Went to sleep by 11:00.

13 May (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:00. Got ready by 7:00 and left for Narsipatnam Road railway station. Took Simhadri Express for Samalkot. Though it is an express train, it was often stopped at stations giving way to other fast trains and reached me to my destination by 10:30. Went out and had a plate of onion dosa in a hotel. Then had a glass of grape juice to withstand the attack of summer. Then bought an empty water bottle and got it filled with cool almond juice for my dear ones coming by train this afternoon. Hazrat Nizamuddin-Visakhapatnam Express arrived in Samalkot by 12:45. I too got into its sleeper class reservation compartment. My brother Srinivas, sister-in-law Sandhya Rani and nephews Sujan and Suhas are coming home on a 20-day casual leave. We got off it at Tuni railway station by 2:30. My brother Sambha also came there to receive them. We hired an auto rickshaw for the heavy luggage and started to our house. We reached home by 3:30. Today it was cloudy and cool due to cyclone situated by Chennai. Sujan and Suhas are good at conversation in Hindi. Night listened to Telugu cine songs. Went to sleep by 10:30.

14 May (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned Eenadu. Went to Adduroad by 9:30 to spend observing the rush of busy people. Principal Mohan Rao of Prajna Junior College called me and talked about a job offer of teaching English to the students of Government Social Welfare Junior College at Nakkapalli. I expressed my inability to utilize this opportunity as I am bound to leave for Alaska very soon. There is a salary of 5000 rupees for this one month long intensive exam oriented preparatory coaching program. Afternoon spent at home listening to Telugu cine songs on tape recorder. Evening went to the rented house portion of my paternal grandparents in Ramayyapatnam along with my uncle Narasimha Murthy on bicycle. They exchanged angry words over the financial issues of their previous undivided family and the consequences. Came back to home by 5:30. Went to Adduroad to buy some items at a shop. Night fetched drinking water from a nearby hand pump. We have been facing water scarcity for the last two weeks. My sisters-in-law Sandhya Rani and Kranti helped me in this domestic chore. Around 8:30, exchange of angry words took place between my father and me. Went to sleep by 9:00. Lakshmi visited me in my dream that followed.

15 May (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned Eenadu. Went to Adduroad by 8:30 and spent talking with my friend Appalaraju for some time. By 10:30 exchanged my previously purchased sweater at Vasavi Sri Lakshmi Cloth Shop. Earlier I bought a ladies’ sweater here because it looked beautiful. My sister-in-law Sandhya Rani told me that it is meant for women and advised me to exchange it. I bought a men’s sweater paying more money. It looked fine. Afternoon I felt giddy for two hours. Listened to Telugu cine songs on Visakha FM radio and simultaneously recorded some of them into my personal collection of audio cassettes. Evening wrote a complaint letter addressing the Mandal Development Officer of Gangavaram in East Godavari district explaining him the burning issues related to village Ramula Devapuram as told by my aunt Venu recently. After that I put my belongings in three cardboard boxes for my Records Section and kept them in a corner of our house. By 4:00 consulted the folks at M.S.R. International in Secunderabad over telephone. They told me that I may leave for Alaska by the end of this month. Night fetched water from a nearby hand pump. Went to sleep by 9:30.

16 May (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned Eenadu. My brother Srinivas left for Molleru Mallavaram by 9:30 from Adduroad by a bus. I brought a rickshaw home to reach my sister-in-law and nephews to the journey spot. We waited for our expected bus for more than one hour. It is Buddha Pournami today. So, the post office was closed. From 12:00 to 4:00 stayed at home and involved myself in recording select Telugu cine songs into an audio cassette from the radio. Went to Adduroad by 4:00 and spent there till 6:00. I have been drinking grape juice for the last 20 days at a familiar stall in Adduroad. During summer in India to have fruit juice frequently means to swim in a river while the surroundings are burning. Night listened to Telugu cine songs on Visakha FM. Fetched water from the nearby hand pump from 8:30 to 9:30. From 10:00 to 3:00 kept listening to and simultaneously recording my favorite Telugu cine songs from Visakha FM into audio cassettes. This private FM radio channel was recently started and became popular fast. Went to sleep by 3:30, hardly leaving space for my dreams.

17 May (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned Eenadu. Stayed at home and spent most of my time listening to songs on tape recorder and watching television. For a bachelor like me, watching English films only helps appease the inevitable basic instincts. Age starts torturing from the stage of thirteen. Deadly attraction develops between a boy and a girl. Tendencies of inhibition and social taboos block the free flow of friendship between the two. Innate pressures influence little creatures. They suffer silently. I think uncivilized humans lead a satisfactory life in this respect. I am practicing virginity. Nobody considers me an achiever of something. Human beauty is spread throughout world. The inner vice compels me to go and savor the attractions of material life. My conscience teaches me that my bodily desires must be satisfied in the company of my wife only. It is Indian culture. As an Indian, I must understand and practice it. I am away from marriage. God must save me. I am a disciplined youth. Spending my life like this without a wife is a result of my fate. Time is growing my age. Went to sleep by 9:30.

18 May (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. It was very hot outside. I utilized this time resting at home. Spent most of my time listening to Telugu cine songs on tape recorder and watching television. The name of Lord Gopal follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 11:00.

19 May (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned Eenadu. Freshened up myself, dressed up myself by 8:30 and went to Adduroad to sit at my friend’s hotel for some time. Came back and set a cot in a good ventilation corner of our house and rested from 9:30 to 11:30. Had my lunch by 12:00 and left for a small trip to a mango grove near village Gudivada along with my uncle Srinu. His maternal uncles were collecting their reserved share of mangoes from their garden (they sold the crop of the season to a buyer). They came in a van for this from Visakhapatnam. We spent in this mango garden from 2:00 to 6:00. I ate many fruit collecting them from under the trees (the trees dropped them). Came back to home by 6:30. My father, the curse of my life, transformed home into a hell for me. I pray God to relieve me from this hell of unrest at home or kill me to bless me with eternal peace. I can’t withstand his uncivilized and highly selfish attitude toward me. Night kept on listening to songs. Slipped into sleep around 2:00.

20 May (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned Eenadu. Went to Adduroad by 8:30 to spend talking with my friend Appalaraju at their hotel for some time. He told me about the village goddess centered fair going on today at Revu Polavaram and proposed my joining him to that fair. I readily agreed for it. His younger brother also joined us. We took an auto rickshaw and reached the venue by 9:30. I could not see the village goddess Bangaramma due to the crowd of worshippers at the temple. My two associates made their way with special effort because they came here to worship this goddess. The horrible scene in this fair is massive killing of birds and animals as an offering to this goddess. About 80% of the devotees bring some innocent creature to this spot to cut its throat and offer its life and consequent agony to the goddess. The motivating factor behind this cruel practice is their belief that the goddess blesses them with prosperity after receiving their offering this way. Hinduism turned very profane due to these inhuman practices. Spent rest of my day casually. Went to sleep by 12:00.

21 May (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned Eenadu. The temperature is on rise taking the vulnerable lives to the sky. Went to our mango grove by 7:30 on my bicycle along with my cousin Ravindra. We sat at the house of my uncle Narayana Murthy for some time and talked about domestic affairs. Collected mango fruit from our grove and came back to home by 10:30. Rested for some time. My cousin Naren came in the meantime. Had my lunch by 11:30. My plan of enjoyment for today is to take my cousins Naren and Ravindra to Elamanchili and see a film in a cinema. We waited for long in Adduroad for a bus. We found that they are on a strike. We took a private vehicle and reached there by 1:30. We saw the Telugu film “Okkadu” in cinema Venkateswara. It was exciting. I called up the folks at the consultancy in Secunderabad and knew that we may fly to Alaska in a fortnight’s time. We returned home by 6:30. Night listened to Telugu cine songs on tape recorder. Went to sleep by 10:30.

22 May (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned Eenadu. Took a bath and wore a new pair of clothes by 8:30. Went to Adduroad by 9:00 and spent there at my friend’s hotel for some time. Went to the house of my uncle Srinu by 10:00 and spent there till 11:00. Came back to home by 11:30 and rested for a while keeping a cot in a good ventilation corner in the front of our house. Had my lunch by 12:30 and then attached myself to television for watching the Axion television channel. This is the best channel available for me presenting endless flow of entertainment through a number of English feature films. For the last one week, this channel has been keeping me engaged during afternoons. Skin show of characters in films and other programs is the fascinating feature of this channel. The open culture of English women in the maintenance of their bodies explains their carefree lives.  I appreciate it. Evening went to Adduroad and bought a T-shirt at Lakshmi Cloth Shop. Night it turned heavily sultry. Helpless bodies resorted to defensive perspiration. Listened to Telugu cine songs on Visakha FM and went to sleep some time between 3:00 and 5:00.

23 May (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned Eenadu. Started to our mango grove by 8:00 on my bicycle along with my uncle Narayana Murthy. Sat at their thatched hut for half an hour. Then went to our mango grove and rested there for some time. Told the boy (garden keeper) to collect the mango fruit from under the trees and put them in bag. Came back to home by 12:30 with that small load of mango fruit. Had my lunch and attached myself to television. Went to Adduroad by 3:30 and bought some vegetables for our garden keeper. Went to Revu Polavaram by 4:30 along with my friend Appalaraju, to meet his friend, who is presently doing a job in the Indian Air Force, to know some details from him. The younger brother of my friend is in the pursuit of that job now. The sky was cloudy. Breezes cooled us down. We talked with that boy for more than one hour at his house. Came back to home by 6:30. Evening it was terribly sultry. Nature seems to be furious with humanity. Evil human thoughts and pollution are threats to environment. May God bless me with refreshing showers of rain. Went to sleep by 12:00.

24 May (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Last night I had a fantastic dream in which I married Sonali Bendre. She devoted very little time for me. It bothered me much. For a committed bachelor like me, to have such a heavenly dream in my account is a matter of joy. I am eagerly waiting for the entry of a girl into my life. I am a dedicated lover of fulfillment and bliss associated with married life. May God bless me with a good wife who deserves my admiration for her. Today also it was very hot and terribly sultry. Morning I wore my new pair of ‘Kumar’ clothes. Constant perspiration is the show of the day due to the orders of angry sun in the distant sky. Set my cot in tune to the movement of air in front of our house. From 10:30 to 3:30 attached myself to television and watched Axion television channel for much time. Went to our mango grove by 4:30 on my bicycle and brought the fruit dropped by trees. This season proved commercially very bad for the mango merchants. They have to commit suicides to escape from the chasing debt burdens on their backs. Night it turned cloudy. Listened to Telugu cine songs. Went to sleep by 10:30 for my dreams.

25 May (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning spent at home. Afternoon my brother Srinivas and sister-in-law Sandhya Rani went to Molleru Mallavaram. Evening went to our mango garden by hills and brought mango fruit on my bicycle. The name of Lord Gopal follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 12:00.

26 May (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned Eenadu. Went to Adduroad by 8:30 and gave two pairs of my clothes to a washerman for washing and ironing. There is no adequate water in ponds and canals for the washermen to wash clothes. Still they are trying their best to serve their clients in this difficulty. Domestic wells and community water resources already got dried up. Poor people are suffering to meet their inevitable water requirements. Spent my time at home from 10:00 to 4:00 simply lying down myself on a cot and listening to cine songs on Visakha FM. At the same time, recorded some songs into an audio cassette. Went to Adduroad by 4:30 and spent there till 6:00 talking with my friend Appalaraju and his family members. Came back to home and took a bath. Now there is no use in taking bath because it sweats as soon as we do it. People and cattle are desperately waiting for water. Crops failed. Farmers are tense. Night too listened to songs. Went to sleep by 12:00 to swim across the stream of my heavenly dreams.

27 May (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned Eenadu. Went to Adduroad by 8:30 to give some mango fruit to the family of my friend Appalaraju. This season there is abundance of mangoes throughout the state. The only way for getting rid of these little poor things is either selling them at low prices or giving them to our familiar ones for goodness sake. I have been doing the latter for the last few days whereas my brother Sambha is doing the prior. Spent at home from 9:00 to 4:00 listening to Telugu cine songs on our tape recorder and simultaneously recording some of them into an audio cassette. Morning my brother Sambha returned from his mango lorry trip. He is not happy with the returns. Went to Adduroad by 4:00 and spent talking with my friends for some time. Had three bottles of buttermilk at a shop to quench my raging thirst. Consumption of cool buttermilk helps the humanity during these hot days. Night listened to songs. Went to sleep by 10:30.

28 May (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Went to our mango grove by 8:30 on my bicycle to bring mangoes from there. My brother Srinivas is leaving for Ambala Cantonment this evening. I have to take a parcel of mango fruit for them. Came back to home soon and packed the items fast. I asked my cousin Vasu to accompany me to Samalkot where my brother and his family take their train for Hazrat Nizamuddin. We hired an auto rickshaw from Adduroad to Narsipatnam Road railway station. We took Bokaro-Alleppey Express by 12:00. We were happy because there was room to stand comfortably. We reached Samalkot Junction by 1:30. I rushed outside and had two glasses of fruit juice to quench my thirst. My brother Srinivas, sister-in-law Sandhya Rani, nephews Sujan and Suhas, and brother Datla Ramesh reached the station by 3:00. We bade them farewell by 4:00. A ticket examiner fined Remesh for 100 rupees. He did not buy platform ticket in the hurry of the occasion. I cursed Indian Railways and pitied Ramesh. We took East Coast Express to Tuni. Again I had adequate amount of juice and took a bus by 8:00. Reached home by 9:00. I felt very tired. Went to sleep by 10:30.

29 May (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned Eenadu. Went to Adduroad by 8:00 and gave some mango fruit to my friend Appalaraju. On the way, went to the house of the washerman and collected the washed and ironed pairs of my clothes. I thought this one would give a clean wash with good water and iron them well but his work was not that qualitative as I expected. He is charging five rupees to wash and iron a pair of clothes which is unjustifiable as per my calculations. There is a devastating scarcity of water. I can’t blame the poor fellow for his faulty work. Came back to home and spent my time listening to songs on tape recorder from 10:00 to 4:00 with a lunch break at 1:30. Went to Adduroad by 4:30 and spent talking with my friend Appalaraju for some time. Came back to home by 6:00 and took my regular evening bath before supper. My brother Sambha left for Berhampur (a town in the state of Orissa) with the lorry of load of mangoes by 8:30. My uncle Srinu is driving this lorry. Finished fetching water from a nearby hand pump by 8:45. Saw the Telugu film “Manmadhudu” of Nagarjuna in cinema Venkatapathi Raju Mahal in the second show. Went to sleep by 12:30.

30 May (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned Eenadu. Went to our washerwoman’s (an old woman) ghat by 8:00 to give her my clothes for washing. I was disturbed looking at the water they were using for their profession. The water was little, muddy and the clothes they should wash in it were plenty. This is why some say that it is better if some things are never seen or heard by us. Spent listening to Telugu cine songs from 10:00 to 1:00 on our tape recorder. Meanwhile my cousin Narendra Varma came from Raja Venkata Nagaram. He has to join polytechnic soon and so in that preparation. I gave some guidelines to him in this regard. Both of us left for his home by 2:00 on two bicycles. I rested there till 400 until power cut occurred. Then went out and breathed fresh air in the coconut grove. Discussed with my uncle Rama Raju the preparatory work to be carried out by him for the coming counseling session of the Polytechnic Admissions for his son Naren. Came back to home by 6:30. Evening it was cloudy and cool. A little rain kissed the dry surface of soil. Night listened to songs. Went to sleep by 10:30 for my heavenly dreams.

31 May (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned Eenadu. Went to Adduroad by 8:00 to collect my ironed clothes from the washerman. They were not readied yet. From 10:00 to 12:00 rested at home. From 12:00 to 1:00 recorded Telugu cine songs into an audio cassette on our tape recorder from the Visakha FM. Watched television from 2:00 to 4:00. Went to Adduroad by 4:30 to spend some time with my friend and collect my clothes from the washerman. There are two mango fruit stains on a white shirt. I am disgusted with it. Came back to home by 6:30. Took a bath and had my supper by 7:00. Night fetched six buckets of water from a nearby hand pump for our domestic use. We have been facing severe water scarcity for the last 20 days. Night wanted to record music from the Delhi radio station (national broadcast) but the presented one was not good. Throughout the night I remained awake to record good Telugu cine songs from the Visakha FM into an audio cassette. It was very sultry. I could not sleep. I am spending my time helplessly. I spent a sweaty night without the sweetness of sleep.

1 June (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent most of my time at home listening to Telugu cine songs on tape recorder, resting on cot and watching television. Night fetched water from the hand pump for our domestic consumption. The name of Lord Gopal follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 10:00.

2 June (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Freshened up myself soon and went to Adduroad by 8:00. Today it is the first working day of Prajna Junior College after summer vacation. I too wanted to participate in the function of that special occasion. Sat in the class of second year Intermediate for 40 minutes. Sridevi, my favorite and intelligent student in this class also came to the class of the inaugural day. I felt happy to know that she passed her first year Intermediate in first class. May God bless her with a long and successful life. I saw my B.A. classmate Swati Lakshmi this morning in Adduroad. My cousin Narendra Varma and I left for Narsipatnam by 11:00. We went to A P R School and collected the certificate of marks of his tenth standard. The peon demanded 50 rupees for this work. Bought a few airmail envelopes at a stall by Sri Kanya Cine Complex. We had grape juice at the stall in the bus complex. We wanted to see a film but the sultry weather discouraged us. Came back to home by 5:30. I felt exhausted. Evening there was a little power cut. Night fetched water from the nearby hand pump. This afternoon I walked in the sunshine. So, went to sleep by 8:30.

3 June (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Freshened up myself soon and started to the mango grove of my uncle Narayana Murthy in village Gurrajupeta along with him on my bicycle. We reached there by 8:00. We spent walking through it for half an hour. Then we took a few mangoes to the house of my younger paternal grandmother (wife of Datla Dharma Raju). Came back to home by 9:30. Went to Sri Prajna Junior College by 9:40 to spend talking with the students of second year Intermediate for some time. They were interested in having their own study hours. I left them free. Went to Gurrajupeta to talk with the village secretary about the issuance of Residence Certificate to my cousin Narendra Varma. That nasty scoundrel talked too much about rules and regulations. I instantly decided to deal with that bug in my style. Came back to home and prepared a postcard for him. Afternoon spent talking with my friend Dara Konda for some time. Then went to cinema Lakshmipati Raju Mahal and saw the Telugu film “Crime Story”. This cinema was bad but the film was good. Took some mango fruit to the house of the mother of my uncle Ramu (of Bhoopalapatnam) in Gurrajupeta by 6:00. Went to sleep by 9:30 for my dreams.

4 June (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent my time casually talking with my friends, listening to Telugu cine songs on tape recorder and fetching some water from the hand pump in the evening for our domestic consumption. My thought follows, “Today the state of affairs is very bad in India for people with values. Commercialization is prevalent in all corners of the country. Hinduism is under threat by foreign waves of attraction and invasion. Farmers are committing suicides being unable to escape from the vicious net of moneylenders and corrupt government policies. Private education is unbearably commercialized. Government school is a helpless choice for the poor. Premarital and extramarital sexual enjoyment is the order of the day for rich people with much fat and lots of leisure. Democracy is no more for common people. Everything is salable if there are buyers. Comfort means thinking that the world is ours and so to exploit everybody and kill anybody. This is time for people with hypocrisy and unlimited selfishness. Charity can’t be practiced well because middlemen exploit beneficiaries in between”. Went to sleep by 10:00.

5 June (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Got ready soon and went to the house of my aunt Subhadra looking for their son Ravindra Varma. I wanted to rebuke him heavily for his nasty behavior. He did not appear to me out of plan. Went to Adduroad by 8:00 and spent talking with my friend Appalaraju for some time. My cousin Narendra Varma came by 9:00. I told him to rest for a while and then to go to take his seventh standard study certificate from Viswa Shanthi Convent School in Adduroad. That fellow (the head of this school) went on canvassing for begging students to join his school and thus provide him with livelihood. Rested from 10:30 to 12:00. Listened to songs for 45 minutes. Started to Elamanchili by 1:30 by bus along with my cousin Naren. We went there for downloading the rank card of his Polytechnic Entrance Examination from Internet. We could not find the original rank card provided by the board on Internet. We found the website address of the board in an old copy of Telugu daily Eenadu in a public library by 4:00. Meanwhile power cut occurred. We could complete this work by 6:00. We returned home by 7:00. Night it was very cold. It rained. Went to sleep by 10:00.

6 June (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning bought a copy of Eenadu in Adduroad and brought it home to read it and spend my time meaningfully. Rested from 9:30 to 3:30 with a lunch break at 1:30. Went to Adduroad by 4:30 and spent talking with my friend Appalaraju for some time. Carried water from the nearby hand pump from 7:30 to 8:30. Evening my uncle Rama Raju and his son Narendra Varma came here from Raja Venkata Nagaram to stay here this night and start to Visakhapatnam tomorrow early morning for attending the counseling session of Polytechnic Admissions there. My thought follows, “Infatuation is a treasure of human life. Human beings like many people many times in their lifetime for unknown reasons. I don’t believe in the psychological purity of life partners in the orthodox marriage systems. Basic instincts work more powerfully than the prevailing social and religious customs on the mind of a sensible person. The western culture influences the people of the East and so they turn very liberal in their thoughts. Majority Indians are incomparable hypocrites when they talk about character. They discuss their cultural values but seldom practice them in their real lives”. Went to sleep by 9:00.

7 June (Saturday)

Woke up by 3:30. Got ready soon and left for Narsipatnam Road railway station by 4:00. My uncle Rama Raju, his son Narendra Varma and I are going to Visakhapatnam to attend the Counseling of Polytechnic Admissions. We took Godavari Express by 5:30 and reached Visakhapatnam by 7:00. Thence we took an auto rickshaw and reached Kanchara Palem by 7:30. We entered the Government Polytechnic by 7:45. The head of Kumar Polytechnic Coaching Center brought the original rank card of Naren at the eleventh hour. The counseling was started by 9:00. Naren got place in Automobile Engineering at Andhra Polytechnic in Kakinada in East Godavari district, based on the status of the remaining vacancies and on my advice. His rank in the CEEP is 2507. We participated in the counseling session from 10:30 to 2:30. We were happy at his luck. We had our lunch at a nearby hotel. We were very tired due to hot weather. We took an express bus and reached Adduroad by 5:15. I called up the folks at M.S.R. International in Secunderabad and was informed that I may be sent to Alaska in ten days’ time. Went to sleep by 9:00 to recover from the day’s threat of heat.

8 June (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent reading Eenadu from 9:00 to 10:30 at the tent house in Adduroad. My brother Sambha and his business partner Narasimha Murthy Raju are out of station. They put me in charge of their tent house. Came back to home by 11:00. Rested on cot till 12:15. Had my lunch by 12:45. Spent watching the Telugu feature film “Sogasu Chooda Tharamaa” on television till 3:00. Power cut occured. Started to our mango garden on bicycle and reached there by 3:30. I became very tired because I rode the bicycle fast in the hot sun. The entire world looked hot. Started back by 4:00 with a small load of mango fruit on my bicycle. Talked with a few familiar ones in Ramayyapatnam for some time on the way. Reached home by 5:00. Went to Adduroad and bought two plastic containers for 75 rupees to carry water from the hand pump to our house. Earlier I struggled much to carry water in buckets. These plastic containers are a great relief for me in this regard. Evening fetched water in these containers from the hand pump tying them at the back of my bicycle. I found it comfortable. From 7:00 to 9:00 listened to Telugu cine songs on tape recorder. Went to sleep by 9:30 for my dreams.

9 June (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Got ready soon and went to the hand pump to bring two containers of water on my bicycle for our domestic consumption. Started to our mango grove by 5:50 on my bicycle along with my cousin Vasu. We went there to bring the collected mango fruit from under the trees this morning. We reached there by 6:30 and returned home by 7:30. I told Vasu to take a good number of mango fruit to their house for their consumption. I turned very sweaty and so cleansed myself taking a bath. Went to the nearby washerman ghat and gave them a pair of my clothes for washing and ironing. They are charging one rupee for one item. This is the cheapest service charge in this region. May God bless these innocent and poor creatures of India. Went to Adduroad by 9:30. Spent some time at the tent house talking with my brother Sambha and an acquaintance. Took the class of first year Intermediate from 11:40 to 12:30 and introduced them their coursebook of English. Discussed Tenses and Voice with them for some time. Had my lunch by 12:40. Rested for half an hour. Went to cinema Venkatapathi Raju Mahal and saw the Telugu feature film “Pellaam Oorelithe” in the matinee show. Went to sleep by 10:00.

10 June (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:00. Freshened up myself soon and fetched four cans of water from the hand pump near the village water tank. There were polished clouds and bright sun in the sky playing their games and discussing the advent of northwest monsoon. Rested from 8:00 to 10:00. From 10:00 to 11:30 listened to my select Telugu cine songs on our tape recorder. Took the class of first year Intermediate from 11:40 to 12:30 in Prajna Junior College. Discussed the topics of Modal Verbs, Correction of Sentences and Spelling. Had a joyful talk with my friend Dara Konda and returned home by 1:00. Had my lunch by 1:15 and attached myself to television. Watched a Telugu feature film for some time. By 2:30 it turned cloudy. I liked it. Fetched six cans of water from the hand pump. My uncle Ramakrishnam Raju and his son Hari came by 12:00. This academic year this fellow enters his tenth standard. He has little hope of success. Recently cold caught me. It is seriously working on me. It is a decent player among bearable disorders. Went to sleep by 9:30 for my invaluable dreams.

11 June (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:00. Freshened up myself soon and attended the chore of fetching water from the hand pump on bicycle. Went to Adduroad by 8:00 and bought a copy of Eenadu. Came back to home and spent reading it from 9:00 to 11:00. Went to Prajna Junior College by 11:40 to take my class. They said some madam had already taken their class and so to take leave for today. Spent talking with my friend Dara Konda for one hour. Came back to home by 1:30 and had my lunch. Rested from 2:00 to 3:30. Met my uncle Srinu by 4:00 and spent with him till 5:00. Carried water from the hand pump from 5:30 to 6:00. My sister-in-law Kranti came from her village Tangedu by 7:00. My uncle Ramakrishnam Raju, my uncle Rama Raju and my cousin Vasu came from Raja Venkata Nagaram by 7:30. My father, my brother Sambha and my cousin Hari were setting our mangos right in our house during this time. Some got rotten. They must be thrown out immediately. The problem is mango fruit are very cheap in the market now. Evening my brother Srinivas and my sister-in-law Sandhya Rani called us up from Ambala Cantonment. Went to sleep by 9:30.

12 June (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Freshened up myself soon and carried water from 7:00 to 8:00. I never carried water for our domestic consumption in my past (when we lived in the mango grove by hills and in Kothuru). My parents and my brother Sambha took that daily chore on to their shoulders. They wanted to bring me up as a sensitive fellow in our house. This time I am doing this duty to help them a little. On the way, paid our monthly electricity bill of 219 rupees at our Panchayat office. My paternal grandfather Thammi Raju came here from Kothuru (also called Ramayyapatnam) by 8:30. We discussed the serious issues of human life and the commercialization of family relationships in the present days. I took him to Adduroad by 10:30 and helped him deposit 10000 rupees into his savings account with Visakha Grameena Bank for his future use. I pity his life with three hypocritical and unreliable sons. The problem with him is that he does not like to stay in the houses of his sons as long as he is able to manage on his own. He looks after his wife affectionately. I want to look after my wife like him. Took my class of first year Intermediate in Prajna Junior College from 11:40 to 12:30 and discussed Articles. Went to Raja Venkata Nagaram by 2:30 along with my cousin Hari. We discussed the matters of our familiar ones till 5:30. Returned home and carried water from the hand pump till 6:30. Called up my friend Veeranjaneyulu in Hyderabad by 6:30. Listened to Telugu cine songs from 7:00 to 9:00. Went to sleep by 10:00 for my dreams.

13 June (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Freshened up myself soon and attended the work of fetching water from the hand pump. Went to Adduroad by 8:30 and bought some tablets at a medical store for my mother for a minor illness. From 9:30 to 10:30 helped my cousin Vasu fill in the application form of Kshatriya Seva Samithi to apply for a scholarship. Rested from 10:30 to 11:30. Took the class of first year Intermediate in Prajna Junior College from 11:40 to 12:30. In today’s class, I introduced them the first lesson in the prose of their main textbook “Visionary Teachers and Scientists”, an extract from the Wings of Fire by A P J Abdul Kalam, a prominent scientist and president of India. By 1:00 had the juice of eight mango fruit at home. It was my lunch for today. Rested from 2:00 to 3:00. Today it was very cloudy and cool facilitating the living beings to comfort and sleep. I liked the setting. Spent with my uncle Srinu for two hours helping him in sending a parcel of mangoes to his relatives in Rajahmundry through Navata Road Transport at Adduroad and in talking with the headmaster of Viswa Shanthi Convent School about admitting his son into this school. Went to sleep by 9:30.

14 June (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning it rained a bit. Finished fetching water from the hand pump by 8:30. When I was resting on a cot, my friend Suresh Balu of my Intermediate days came on a scooter from Elamanchili. We spent talking for one hour. He took me to Elamanchili by 10:30 and introduced me to the students in Gitanjali Junior College by main road. His brother and he started this college one year ago. Within a short time, he could earn a good name for this college. Presently he is seriously involved in developing it to further heights of achievement. However, the guiding factor behind this work is wisely and comfortably earning money. He asked me to teach English to the first year Intermediate students for some days until I start to Alaska. Taught the introductory part of the first prose lesson to them from 11:30 to 12:30. He ordered chicken biryani to me for 30 rupees at Dhana Lakshmi Hotel as a friendly gesture. Saw the Telugu film “Dhil” in cinema Sita Chitramandir from 2:30 to 5:00. Returned home by 6:00 by bus. Night too it was cool. Went to sleep by 9:30.

15 June (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent most of my time with my uncle Srinu attending the timber cutting work of my uncle Narayana Murthy. It was cloudy and cool. The name of Lord Gopal follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare.  Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare.  Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare.  Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Night listened to Telugu cine songs on tape recorder. Went to sleep by 11:00.

16 June (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Finished carrying water from the hand pump by 8:30. Went to Adduroad by 9:00 and spent talking with my friend Appalaraju for some time. Today it was cool. Pleasant wind was blowing toward his small hotel by the road. Rested at home from 10:00 to 11:30. Went to Prajna Junior College by 11:40 and taught them the first half of the essay of A P J Abdul Kalam. I think the position of a teacher is worse than that of a student. There is nothing such as “The Best Teacher” because the student capacity has to decide it. Had my lunch by 1:30 and rested till 3:00. Went to Adduroad and spent talking with my friend for some time. Came back to home and ate a good number of mango fruit. Then went to Adduroad. Left for Nakkapalli in an auto rickshaw. Met my friend there and took him to Achari Photo Studio to borrow a small camera for a function coverage by me. The photographer lent me a Canon piece. Came back to home by 6:00. Night there was power cut from 6:30 to 9:00. Went to sleep by 9:00.

17 June (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Freshened up myself soon and left for the house of my uncle Narayana Murthy in the mango grove near hills by 6:00. My bicycle is the best servant to me. It is always successful in reaching me to our mango grove within half an hour from Peda Gummuluru. My cousin Ashwini reached her puberty. So, they are conducting this traditional ceremony. Some ignorant and stupid people of India celebrate this biological occurrence in a girl. My uncle too belongs to this category of brainless villagers. A few invitees attended the function and blessed the girl. I was the honorary photographer of this small celebration. My uncle asked me for that favor. After capturing this occasion, came back to home by 12:30. Left for Payakaraopeta by 1:30 from Adduroad in an auto rickshaw. Reached there by 2:00. Went to cinema Surya Mahal and saw the Telugu feature film “Palanati Brahma Naidu” of Bala Krishna to observe the acting talent of my friend Lahari. She played a small role in it. After seeing this film, went to a nearby color lab for the development and print of the negatives of today’s coverage of photos. Returned home by 8:00. Went to sleep by 10:00.

18 June (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Freshened up myself soon and attended the work of fetching water from the hand pump. Went to Adduroad by 8:30 and spent talking with my friend Appalaraju at the hotel for some time. Returned home by 9:00 and rested till 11:00. Took the class of first year Intermediate in Prajna Junior College from 11:40 to 12:30 and completed the lesson involving the message of A P J Abdul Kalam to the youth of India. Had my lunch by 12:40 and started to the temple of Lord Venkateswara in village Upamaka by 2:00 in an auto rickshaw from Adduroad along with my friend Dara Konda. Recently the shooting of Telugu film “Sree Anjaneyam” was started at this temple in the direction of Krishna Vamsy. We went there today to see the environment of a film shooting. Related technicians were carrying out the task of painting the temple grey to give it an antique look. I think this temple would be presented as an old one featuring Nitin, Arjun and Aditi Agarwal (later Charmi was taken to play the heroine role). We returned to Adduroad by 2:30. Rested at home till 4:00. By the invitation of my uncle Srinu, left for Visakhapatnam by the arranged bus to attend the marriage of Naveen, the son of Achchibabu, a rich man in our village from the Kshatriya community. My cousin Hari too joined us. We enjoyed the bus journey throughout.

19 June (Thursday)

The wedding reception was arranged at Kshatriya Kalyana Mandapam in Seetamma Dhara in Visakhapatnam. It was commendable. Many attendees spent their time playing cards after dinner by 9:00 (yesterday night). I spent reading Telugu daily Eenadu for some time. We rested from 11:00 to 12:00. The marriage was conducted in the front yard of the bride’s house from 1:00 to 4:00 (today early morning). It was very cold and cloudy. We enjoyed the occasion. The bride was beautiful and a fitting match to the equally handsome bridegroom. I like being an invitee to such marriages where the bride and the bridegroom are compatible to each other in beauty and age. Otherwise marriage remains merely an exhibition of clowns and garbage. We started back by 5:30 from Seetamma Dhara and reached Peda Gummuluru by 7:30. It was cool. I enjoyed this bus journey. Rested at home from 8:30 to 11:00. Took the class of first year Intermediate in Prajna Junior College from 11:40 to 12:30 and discussed English grammar. Had my lunch by 1:00. Took a nap from 1:30 to 4:00. Finished fetching water by 6:30. Night listened to Telugu cine songs. Went to sleep by 10:00.

20 June (Friday)

Woke up by 5:15. Freshened up myself soon and attended the work of fetching water from the hand pump near the water tank on my bicycle. Went to washerman ghat and gave them one pair of my clothes for washing and ironing. There is severe scarcity of water despite the little rain recently due to the minor impact of northwest monsoon. Took the class of first year Intermediate in Prajna Junior College from 9:00 to 9:50. Came back to home by 10:30 and rested till 11:30. Took my second class of teaching at the college from 11:40 to 12:30. Owing to the large number of first year students, two sections were formed for convenience. Afternoon ate five sweet mango fruit in my lunch. Rested at home from 1:30 to 3:30. Carried water from the hand pump from 4:30 to 5:30. It is the first death anniversary of my maternal grandfather Subba Raju today. It is being conducted in Gollalagunta today. Many of my relatives attended it. Night listened to Telugu cine songs. Went to sleep by 9:30.

21 June (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Freshened up myself soon and attended the work of fetching water. Had my breakfast by 8:30. Took my class of first year Intermediate in Prajna Junior College from 9:00 to 9:50 and discussed the given gist of Shakespeare’s poem “All the World’s a Stage”. From 10:00 to 11:30 rested at home enjoying the cool weather outside. Clouds are plenty but rain is scanty. The postman delivered my subscription copy of the quarterly from the Kshatriya Seva Samithi in Hyderabad. Took my second class of teaching from 11:40 to 12:30. Had my lunch by 1:00. Got ready for my trip to the coconut garden of my uncle Narasimha Murthy along with him by 2:00 on bicycle. We reached his garden in one hour’s time via Gurrajupeta. He showed me his farm and then told me about the profitability of some crops he recently cultivated. He told his farmhand to pluck out two coconuts from a tree for me to have cool water from them. Returned home by 5:30. Carried water till 6:00. Listened to songs. Went to sleep by 9:30.

22 June (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning and evening fetched water from the hand pump on my bicycle. By 6:30 (in the evening) left for Elamanchili along with my friend Gangaraju. Night the marriage of our B.A. classmate Narasinga Rao took place there. We friends reached the venue of marriage by 7:30. We spent happily talking among ourselves for some time. They presented a water filter to him. It cost 700 rupees. We had our dinner by 9:00. We returned home by 10:00 by a lorry. The name of Lord Gopal follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 10:30.

23 June (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Freshened up myself soon and carried out the chore of fetching water from the hand pump. Took my class of first year Intermediate in Prajna Junior College from 9:00 to 9:50. Rested at home from 10:00 to 11:30. Took my second class of first year Intermediate from 11:40 to 12:30. Had my lunch by 1:00. Rested for one hour. Then went to cinema Venkatapathi Raju Mahal in Adduroad and saw the Telugu film “Thrinethram”. It is a devotional film highlighting the victory of a Hindu Goddess against the black magic of an evil man. The story is weak. The viewers are supposed to feel that they are watching a film for the sake of director’s satisfaction. Carried water from the hand pump from 6:00 to 6:30. The news of stamping of our visas is not yet received from the consultancy in Secunderabad. The managing director of the consultancy has to be treated as a scoundrel for his baseless promises to us earlier. May God speed up the process and send us soon to Alaska. Night observed the casual talk of my uncles at home. Went to sleep by 9:30.

24 June (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Last night it rained. Its cooling effect could be found this morning. The wetness of soil is pleasing peasant farmers. From 9:00 to 9:50 took my class of first year Intermediate in Prajna Junior College. Rested at home from 10:00 to 11:30. From 11:40 to 12:30 took my second class in the junior college. Had my lunch by 1:00 and rested till 2:30. Wanted to go to the matinee show but could not due to the unexpected extension of my siesta. Went to the house of my uncle Srinu by 3:00. He was involved in cooking food. It is an observation in traditional Hindu families to keep the woman away from attending her domestic chores during her days of period. Her husband, children or the available womenfolk have to prepare food at home during those days. In a way it should be considered a superstition and in another way as a relief to housewives for those three days at least. Night too it was cool. It is a positive sign of the arrival of northwest monsoon. Went to sleep by 9:30.

25 June (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Went to Adduroad by 7:30. Had my breakfast of four purees at my friend’s hotel. Today too I took my two classes in Sri Prajna Junior College. I felt disappointed to know that I don’t take their classes from tomorrow. I found my days happy in interaction with them. Teaching keeps one happy because it necessitates one to be in constant attachment with learners. It makes one feel that one belongs to this world in some sense in a good way. Had my lunch by 1:00. Started to the house of my uncle Rama Raju at Raja Venkata Nagaram by 2:00 by a bus from Adduroad. We discussed the common things of our familiar ones. We also discussed how my cousins Vasu and Naren should conduct themselves in their academic pursuits. Returned to Adduroad by 5:00. Spent talking with Raghu Babu at his house in Adduroad for one hour. We talked a lot about the present education of his three children. Thence proceeded to the house of Pusapati Subba Raju and spent talking with him for one hour. My brother Sambha bought mango fruit for me. I was touched by his affection. Went to sleep by 9:30 in the open in our front yard.

26 June (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Freshened up myself soon and attended the work of fetching water from the hand pump from 7:00 to 9:00. My folks at home have been suffering for water for the last one month. I helped them a little through this. Morning my mother washed my clothes to help me have a well-prepared journey to Hyderabad this evening. I took the mango jelly prepared by my mother as her invaluable gift to me to carry on my journey. Rested from 10:30 to 3:00. Went to Adduroad by 3:30 to hire a rickshaw for carrying my luggage. I left my home by 4:00 taking leave of my mother and sister-in-law Kranti. My cousin Hari accompanied us up to Adduroad to send me off. My brother Sambha and I reached the APSRTC Bus Complex in Tuni by 5:30 taking a lorry from Adduroad. Visakhapatnam-Hyderabad Hitech bus arrived in Tuni by 8:00. Took leave of my brother and set off to Hyderabad with the intention of flying to Alaska soon. We halted for 20 minutes at Annavaram Bus Station for having our supper in the hotel there. I had a plate of chapati. They put on Telugu feature film “Jeans” on television in the bus. I hardly slept during the journey.

27 June (Friday)

The bus brought us to Mahatma Gandhi Bus Station in Hyderabad by 9:30. An untidy girl vomited on my feet in the bus when I was getting ready to alight. I was much disturbed by this but softly rebuked the woman accompanying the girl. Looked for my friend in the bus stand. He did not turn up. Hired an auto rickshaw to the rented apartment of my friend Veeranjaneyulu for 150 rupees. Reached Doyen’s Colony by 12:10. The auto rickshaw driver asked me for ten more rupees. Refreshed myself, had my lunch and called up the receptionist at M.S.R. International in Secunderabad to enquire about the availability of M S Raju, the managing director of this consultancy. Rested from 1:30 to 3:00. Started to Secunderabad by 3:45. Reached the office of the consultancy by 5:30. Met the fellow and knew that I can’t leave for Alaska till the end of coming August. He presented me some unjustifiable reasons for this heavy delay. On the day when I paid him the full amount of money, he told me that I would leave for Alaska by the end of this May. It is an intolerable piece of news for me because I was already deeply disturbed counting my days to go to Alaska. I am unable to stay at home any more and so came to Hyderabad. May God be kind to me. Had my supper by 9:30. Went to sleep by 10:30.

28 June (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. All the day spent within the abode of Veeranjaneyulu. From 8:00 to 8:00 kept on listening to Telugu cine songs on his Walkman. It’s like celebrating the entire day in heaven. God suddenly rewrote my destiny. Since the 20th of this April, I have been counting each day and night to fly to Alaska depending on the dates given by the consultancy. The familiar people in our village and the moneylenders were asking me about the date of my journey to the U.S. I was suffering within myself. Being unable to stay there any more, I came to Hyderabad. I am lucky to get a friend like Veeranjaneyulu. He should have born two centuries ago. Commercialism and opportunism are the predominant values of present age in which such these gentlemen can’t shine despite their virtues and toil. He is providing me with shelter and food for these few days. Spending time idly is hell. If one has to withstand it, it must be considered leisure provided by God. Dreams may come true late. Went to sleep by 10:00.

29 June (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning spent within the abode of Veeranjaneyulu. By 2:00 left for Journalist Colony ‘A’ in Jubilee Hills along with Veeru. He is searching for a rented apartment. Rich people live in this area. Their houses are very beautiful. We liked a ground portion in a house. We talked with the owner of this house. We returned to his abode by 9:30. I felt very elevated spending for some time in that area. They live happily in their luxurious houses. Their lifestyles are admirable. I was disappointed looking at the beautiful girls and couples traveling in their attractive cars on those roads. When do I spend my time happily like them with my wife? There is not even a single girl to love me in this huge human world. My crazy age is melting like an ice cream left in a desert. I remained solitary and forsaken in this animated world. Time pities none. Everybody can’t run along with the changes of time. It is not that easy to achieve success at every stage of one’s life. God gave man a long life to allow him to experience it completely and feel its beauty of diversity in a true sense. Admiration of beauty is the duty of creatures like me. That sense of relationship and attachment lasts till the end of one’s life. One can be happy as long as one can love every creature and entity in this world. Went to sleep by 11:00.

30 June (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent within the abode of Veeru till 1:00. Then went to Journalist Colony ‘A’ in Jubilee Hills along with my friend Bhayya to pay the advance of the house rent to the owner of the house on behalf of our friend Veeranjaneyulu. Came back to Veeru’s abode by 4:00. Had my supper by 9:30 and left for Serilingampally along with Bhayya. We saw the Telugu feature film “Oka Raju Oka Rani” of Ravi Teja and Namita in cinema Sridevi in the second show. The story is weak. It is meant for loafers. We came back to Veeru’s abode by 1:00 hiring an auto rickshaw for 15 rupees. Half of the New Year comes to an end by today. When I look back, it seems like a bushfire. Time got burnt off within seconds. However, searching for a good job can’t be a crime. I ended up with the dream of going to Alaska for the lucrative job of fish packing where they pay me a salary of one lakh rupees per month at the minimum. I tried hard to motivate my father toward borrowing 2, 40,000 rupees for this venture. They already borrowed money adequately from others. I added my burden also to them. May Lord Krishna help me. Went to sleep by 1:30.

1 July (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Most of the day stayed within the abode of Veeru and spent listening to Telugu cine songs. Left for Serilingampally by 6:30 along with Veeranjaneyulu and other friends. We saw the Telugu film “Donga Ramudu & Party” directed by Vamsy. Many of our friends commented that it is a boring film. Veeru and I are the admirers of the films of this director. This film does not score much compared to his previous classics. We have to accept it. We saw the film from 7:30 to 10:30 enjoying every bit of it. I don’t understand why present viwers can’t savor the flavor of good films. They are accustomed to a high breed sort of films which portray characters as the symbols of bloodshed and unbelievable heroism. These days anybody can produce a film to make everybody go, see and forget it within days. Film-making is for money-making now. Heroines must be ready to sleep with film-makers to get fame and flesh in minutes and lose it in seconds. Hypocrites are aplenty in this industry. They are misguiding the society. Went to sleep by 11:50.

2 July (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. All the day stayed within the abode of Veeru. Most of the time spent listening to Telugu cine songs. My thought follows, “I observe three dangerous threats to the unity and prosperity of India now which I like to call ‘C3 Syndrome’. The three words representing this concept are: Coca Cola, Cricket and Christianity. This American company has penetrated so deeply into the Indian market that one can find this beverage even in highly remote areas where water may not be available. People became addicts. They imagine themselves as lords after gulping down this magic tonic, which contains nothing useful to health. Many Indians are mad after cricket and cricket players now. The government is spending crores of rupees for the development of this nasty game and players are also earning hugely. Mentally ill fans of this filthy game waste their valuable time always engaging themselves in the thoughts and pursuits centered on this game. The mission of Christians to serve the Indian poor may be appreciated but the corresponding massive religious conversions will be a big threat to mainstream Hinduism in India in future. These three characteristics of India lead her into a cemetery from a flower garden”. Went to sleep by 12:00.

3 July (Thursday)

Woke up by 6:30. All the day stayed within the abode of Veeru and kept on listening to Telugu cine songs on tape recorder. It was very attractive outside with the games of dark clouds in the bright sky. Such weather won’t be enjoyable for bachelors like me. Life looks terribly unbearable without a female associate. Age tortures heavily in youth when the nature entices one to come and enjoy it. Richness and tactics work to get a friend these days. I think that civilized society is a hell for disciplined fellows like me. There are exceptionally beautiful girls all around in our villages and cities but the familial customs and restrictions regulate all these creatures to stay segregated from one another. Basic instincts urge creatures to go and meet the opposite sex to spend time in a fruitful way. The conservative lifestyles practiced in conformist countries like India are, in a way, fetters to the spirit of human liberty. All human beings are not brutes to fear and so to keep away from them. Sociability and trust are necessary among males and females. Western people are good in this respect. They don’t act daily like Indians”. Went to sleep by 10:30.

4 July (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Most of the day stayed within Veeru’s abode and kept on listening to Telugu cine songs on tape recorder. Started to Serilingampally by 2:30 along with our common friend Trinath. He did Theatre Arts from the University of Hyderabad. Now he is trying for opportunities in Telugu films and television serials. We saw the Telugu film “Amma Naanna O Tamila Ammaayi” in cinema Geeth from 3:30 to 6:00. I saw this film for the second time to give company to my friend. Puri Jagannath directed this film. He is a famous figure in the present Telugu film industry. Ravi Teja, the hero of the film, lives with his highly affectionate mother who divorced her husband. They live like two helpless creatures of possessiveness and vulnerability. Her death reaches him to his father who is a famous kickboxing coach in Visakhapatnam. The hero keeps up the reputation of his father winning a national level competition. This film portrays the shallowness of modern lifestyles and the resultant suffering of the affected ones. Talked with Veeru for some time. Went to sleep by 12:00.

5 July (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning spent listening to songs on tape recorder and talking with our friends. Went to the HCU campus by 10:30 along with Veeranjaneyulu, Trinath and Sangam. We met an employee of the university who is also a correspondent of the Telugu daily Andhra Jyothi. He interacted with Veeranjaneyulu for half an hour to know about his entry into the art field and his growth as an artist. He came to Veeru’s abode by 12:00. We offered him biscuits and tea. He saw the drawings and paintings of Veeranjaneyulu and was impressed. Again he talked with the artist. He took some of his paintings and photos and said that he would write an article introducing him to readers. Evening went to Serilingampally along with my friend Bhayya to bring video compact discs of Telugu feature films to play and watch them on our friend’s computer. I took “Sitara” and “Vasantha Kokila”, two great films, out of many available, which I could not see previously. We started “Sitara”. By the time half of it was over, power cut occurred due to rain outside. I was much disturbed by this eventuality. Went to sleep by 12:30.

6 July (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent most of my time within the abode of Veeru. Evening went to Serilingampally in an auto rickshaw and returned the video CDs of Telugu feature films “Sitara” and “Vasantha Kokila” to the folks at Trinethra Video Center. Last night we could not watch them completely. We spent 50 rupees for it. Night watched the Telugu feature film “Ammaayilu Abbaayilu” on a computer along with Bhayya from 10:30 to 1:00. The name of Lord Gopal follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare.  Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 1:30.

7 July (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Listened to Telugu cine songs till 11:00 on tape recorder. We had our lunch by 12:30. Recently introduced and well familiarized (by Veeru) friend Shanmukh and I left for the HCU campus by 1:00. We went to the Administrative Block first. He checked the results of the recently held entrance test into Master of Fine Arts. He was a student of B.F.A. at Andhra University and a friend of Veeru. Thereafter we moved to Shopping Complex. By this time my constitution gave way to motions in my bowels for some unidentifiable reasons. Took tablets to face this attack after relieving myself at Men’s Hostel ‘C’.  I took this tablet with the “Sprite” soft drink of a multinational company in the bad phenomenon of created scarcity of public drinking water by the commercial outlets of modern Indian economy. We could not have a look at the girl to see whom we went there on the request of our friend Veeranjaneyulu. He is trying to marry a traditional Brahmin girl from the Telugu Department in this university. He sent us to observe her from distance to assess her physical beauty. She had already left the campus. She is living in the city. Went to sleep by 11:00.

8 July (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. All the day stayed within the abode of Veeru. My father called me up by 9:30 and enquired me about my being well. He is much worried about the delay in my journey to Alaska. He told me to come home as there is nearly two months’ time to go to Alaska. I told him that there is no problem for me to stay in the city. He borrowed money from his familiar ones on my strong resolution of going to Alaska. Every delayed month of my journey presses him in this direction. My crucial problem here in the city lies in finding a place for my temporary stay. I have been staying with my friend Veeranjaneyulu ever since I came to the city. There are no problems of food and accommodation. He looks after many friends at any given point of time. I am one of such friends of him. I don’t like to prolong it. I decided to go to the room of Bhayya in Men’s Hostel ‘F’ on the HCU campus this evening but the request of my friend was not readily accepted by the hostel warden there to accommodate me in his room. The university treats me as an outsider now because I am not studying there. There is no point of going back to home now. Many take me as a failure case. May God guide me. Went to sleep by 11:30.

9 July (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:00. Got ready soon and left for Journalist Colony ‘A’ in Jubilee Hills by 6:30 by bus along with Bhayya, Padhi and Trinath. We met K Rajya Lakshmi, the owner of the house, into which our friend Veeranjaneyulu is moving soon as a tenant. We discussed related things with her. She told us to bring the main person. We returned to Veeru’s abode by 9:30. Rested for some time. Watched the Telugu feature film “Gemini” of Venkatesh on the computer of our friend for some time. Had my lunch by 1:30 and spent talking with our friends for two hours. It was raining outside. Veeranjaneyulu, Yoganand, Trinath and I left for the House Number 97 A in Journalist Colony ‘A’, to talk with the owner of the house before moving into that portion. They finalized important things. Veeru told her that he would move into that portion at the earliest. We returned to Veeru’s abode by 9:00 getting wet in the rain on the journey. My M.A. classmate Viswa Prasad called me up from Visakhapatnam. He is doing well. Artist Ramesh also called me up from the city. We talked about various things. It was drizzling outside. Breezes were blowing inside. Went to sleep by 11:30.

10 July (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent most of my time within the abode of Veeru. Night we watched an untitled film on the computer of our friend. This film was shot by the lover of a girl. Her innocent looks are an attraction to the secret viewers of the show. The girl looked old with glasses on her eyes. Once she removes them, her facial beauty emerges. She goes to bed and lies naked. Her young and passionate lover approaches her to remove the bed sheet from her soft and beautiful body. She turns shy receiving and enjoying his amorous advances. Then he leads her into the domain of sensual pleasures slowly entering the act and playing his part. She enjoys it expressing her feelings and sounds as a novice in this practice. After the first episode, she moves to bathroom to take her bath and balance her burning spirit. Her boyfriend shoots her bathing scene which is enjoyable for men with suppressed basic instincts. Very few allow their boyfriends to do such things with a camera. After her bath, they again enter their domain of mutual exploration and enjoyment. I heard that it was shot in Mysore years ago. It was leaked and entered public domain. Youth with suppressed desires enjoy this visual wonder stolen from its owners (Mysore Mallige story). I became one of them today. Went to sleep by 12:30.

11 July (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Went to State Bank of India by the HCU campus and withdrew 3500 rupees from my savings account for lending to my friend Veeranjaneyulu and spending a little for me. I recently deposited some money to keep the balance at 5000 rupees. My friend has recently gone bankrupt due to his excessive spending and lack of vision. I pity these people who are very good by nature but vulnerable to the threats of their unregulated expenditure. Afternoon spent in the abode of Veeru reading Manorama yearbook and listening to my favourite Telugu cine songs on tape recorder. The friends of Veeranjaneyulu, who are supervising the renovation of his rented portion in Jubilee Hills, revealed some bitter facts about the cruel and cunning mentality of the owner of the house. Earlier she told us that the monthly rent of the portion is 2500 rupees. Now she is saying that it is 3000 rupees. She is badly talking with the hired workers of Veeru. She is a lawyer and looks like a decent woman at one’s first glance. My friend is very sensitive. So, he is very disturbed by the hypocrisy of this woman. He spent a day of frustration and disturbance due to it. Went to sleep by 11:30.

12 July (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Freshened up myself soon and left for the HCU campus by 7:00. I am going to welcome my friend Viswa Prasad to the campus. He is coming from Visakhapatnam. His brother is doing a course in the National Institute of Fashion Technology (NIFT) at Madhapur. He is coming here to search for a rented room for his brother. Met him at Men’s Hostel ‘A’. He has recently completed his M.Ed. course from the Regional Institute of Education, the southern regional center of the NCERT at Mysore in Karnataka. He wants to do his Ph.D. in Education from the same institute. I am happy at his constructive and visionary career planning. We had our breakfast at the small canteen in the Shopping Complex and proceeded to Room No. 310 in Men’s Hostel ‘F’ where Bhayya is staying as an M.Tech. student. We spent talking with him for some time. We went to Veeru’s abode by 12:30 and spent there talking with him till 4:00. We went back to Men’s Hostel ‘F’ by 5:00. Bhayya and I attended the Kuchipudi Dance Recital by the students of Jonnalagadda Anuradha, a faculty member from the University of Hyderabad, meant to be watched by the foreign students of the campus, as part of their “Study India Program”, in the Seminar Complex, from 6:30 to 8:00. Bhayya went to Veeru’s abode to do some work. I slept in Room No. 310 in Men’s Hostel ‘F’ by 9:30.

13 July (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning had my breakfast at the small hotel in Shopping Complex. Took the bicycle of Bhayya and proceeded to the abode of Veeru. Today he is going to his new rented portion in Journalist Colony ‘A’. I spent there from 10:00 to 4:00 helping him pack his belongings. By 4:15 he started to Journalist Colony ‘A’ in a van along with his friends. Bhayya and I returned to the HCU campus on bicycle. Had my supper by 8:30 in the canteen by Gopal Shop. The name of Lord Gopal follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare.  Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare.  Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 10:30 in the hostel room of Bhayya.

14 July (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30 in Room No. 310 in Men’s Hostel ‘F’ which belongs to my friend Bhayya. Prepared a request letter addressing the chief warden of this university asking him to charge 10 rupees per day for my guest stay with my friend Bhayya and also to allow me to stay here till the end of next month. These are my essential needs of the hour. They previously agreed to allow me to stay here for one month at the sharing room rent of 20 rupees a day. I told Bhayya to give this request letter to this hostel warden because he must consider our application first. Reached Abids by 11:30 along with my friend Viswa Prasad to buy some items. He bought a pair of thongs in a BATA showroom for 69 rupees. He got a ticket reserved for Godavari Express to Visakhapatnam. Then we had our lunch (a plate of vegetable biryani) for 14 rupees in a hotel by Nampally (Hyderabad) railway station. Went back to the HCU campus by 4:00 by bus. It started drizzling by 5:30. Around 8:30 Bhayya and I were going to New Research Scholars’ Hostel for having our supper there. The chief warden (sitting in his car) stopped us on the road by Shopping Complex. He talked aggressively with Bhayya about the tone of my request letter to them. Went to sleep by 10:00.

15 July (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. I was hurt by the words of Appa Rao, the present chief warden of the university, a professor from the Department of Animal Science, who informed me to submit an apology letter to the warden of the hostel immediately. I decided to leave the campus. So, wrote an apology letter addressing the hostel warden. My bosom friend Bhayya told me to reconsider my decision to leave the campus. My wounded psyche did not allow me to stay back any more. I stated in my apology letter that I was hurt and so leaving the campus. Inwardly I cried in my heart observing the cruel treatment of the university authorities toward alumni. Morning and afternoon my friend Viswa Prasad and I walked through Kothaguda, Sudarshan Nagar and Doyen’s Township for about six hours searching for a room at a monthly rent of 800 rupees for his brother. He is doing a course at the NIFT in Madhapur. We covered an area of about ten kilometers by walk. We could not find even one suitable room at his budget. Evening called up a clerk in the office of Kshatriya Seva Samithi in New Nallakunta and enquired him about the possibility of my paid stay in their hostel for some days. They replied in the positive. I reached Kshatriya Seva Samithi Hostel in DD Colony by Shivam Road in an auto rickshaw by 5:00 with the assistance of my friend Manohar Babu from the university campus. Went to sleep by 10:00.

16 July (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Kshatriya Seva Samithi Hostel (for boys) is located in Durgabai Deshmukh Colony by Shivam Road near the Institute of Maths and Statistics. Last night I bought a mat to sleep on for all these days and nights to come. An old man from our Kshatriya community is the supervisor of this hostel. They pay him a monthly salary of 1600 rupees. I filled in an application form and paid him 455 rupees with my forethought of staying here for 45 days only. The fixed room rent for one month per person is 200 rupees. According to the date given by the people at the consultancy in Secunderabad, I can fly to Alaska by the end of this August. I pray my Lord Gopal to relieve me at the earliest and save me from the increasing financial burden, month by month. In a way, I am happy to find a place to put my helpless body and luggage in a secure place like this. Today it was cloudy and rainy due to the effect of cyclone. I bought 30 meal tickets for 550 rupees from Shirdi Sai Baba Hotel down the Shivam Road on the left after the Shivam Temple on the right. May God bless me. Evening washed a pair of clothes. Had my supper by 9:00. Went to sleep by 10:30.

17 July (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Freshened up myself and went out for my breakfast by 8:30. Had a plate of purees and scanned the Telugu daily Eenadu for some time at the hotel. Bought a copy of it and returned to my hostel room by 9:00. Spent reading the newspaper till 1:00. Then went to Shirdi Sai Baba Hotel and had my lunch. Returned to my room by 2:00. Read the remaining part of the newspaper till 5:30. Then went down and sat talking with Kanumuri Lakshmi Narasimha Raju, the supervisor of this hostel. He is about 72. He was born in village Poduru in West Godavari district. He is a disciplined person with values and responsibilities in life. It is my joy to spend talking with him for some hours. He narrated me his past. I found it engaging. He is staying with his wife on the terrace of this hostel. He is provided with a small shelter of iron sheets. It started raining from 6:00. I finished the talk by 8:30 and went out to call up my friend Veeranjaneyulu. I felt heavy and so avoided my supper for this night. Went to sleep by 10:30.

18 July (Friday)

Woke up by 6:00. Freshened up myself soon. Went out to a hotel. Had my breakfast of four purees for five rupees. Bought a copy of Eenadu and returned to my room by 9:00. Spent reading it till 12:30. Took out my electric iron for getting it repaired. Walked down in the direction of my hotel. The mechanic said that its filament failed. It must be replaced with a new one. It all costs me 200 rupees. I am not in a position to bear this expenditure and make it hot again. So, withdrew myself from that assignment. Went to Shirdi Sai Baba Hotel and had my lunch by 1:30. Scanned some dailies lying there for some time and then returned to my room. Went through the general knowledge section of the Manorama yearbook (2003) for a while and then took a siesta for one hour. Spent observing the traffic on the road opposite our hostel till 5:30. Got one pair of my clothes ironed paying three rupees to a washerman there in the block of apartments. Went out and called up my folks at home by 7:00. My cousin Hari and my mother talked with me. My mother is affected with a skin allergy and intends to consult a specialist in Narsipatnam. Had my supper by 10:00 in the hotel. Went to sleep by 11:00.

19 July (Saturday)

Woke up by 6:00. Freshened up myself and went for my breakfast to Greenlands Hotel down Shivam Road. Bought a copy of Eenadu and returned to my room by 9:00. Spent reading the newspaper till 12:30. Went to Shirdi Sai Baba Hotel by 1:30 and had my lunch. Returned to my room by 2:30 and spent reading the general knowledge section of Manorama yearbook for some time. Went down by 5:00 and sat with Narasimha Raju discussing various things which emerge through our casual talk. The main topic of this evening was the existence of devils and ghosts. There is a lot of evidence world over showing that these supernatural creatures created a good amount of mess to many men and women in various circumstances. They are mostly believed to be the invisible evil souls of the dead people who die with their unfulfilled desires and revenges in connection with the attractions and mysteries of this material world. Mysterious events, deaths and accidents also contribute to this sphere of speculations, fears and beliefs. They make noise and keep walking with lamps in their hands at nights maintaining some distance from human beings. They have a long history. Went to sleep by 11:00 for my dreams.

20 July (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent all the day casually. The name of Lord Gopal follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare.  Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 11:00.

21 July (Monday)

Woke up by 6:00. Freshened up myself soon and went out for my breakfast. It was cloudy and a feast to my senses. Today I bought The Hindu because there were no interesting stories in today’s Eenadu. Returned to my room and scanned it till 9:00. Then started reading the Telugu novella Ooru Pommantondhi of Ponnada Satyanarayana. It is a supplement with the latest Telugu monthly Swati. I finished reading it by 1:00. It is a good work describing the short-sighted and self-centred mentalities and manners of modern man. There are many characters, each representing a vice or virtue of a middle-class man. Now people are in the direction of getting separated themselves from their dear ones also to earn and enjoy on their own. They miss the beauty and sweetness of human relationships in their native soil by the time they realize that they lost much running after money and fame in distant places. Evening sat with my hostel supervisor and spent talking with him for more than two hours. Had my supper by 8:30 in the hotel. On the way back, bought “Ariselu” (our regional sweet) and gave some of them to the hostel supervisor. Went to sleep by 11:00.

22 July (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Freshened up myself soon and went out for my breakfast by 7:30. On the way back, bought a copy of Eenadu. Returned to my room and spent reading it from 8:30 to 12:30. In its district edition, it was written that Pingali Sailaja, Reader of English in the University of Hyderabad, was selected for the award of Commonwealth Fellowship. She goes to the Edinburgh University in the United Kingdom soon. There she will do a research project on morphology for six months. She told me about it when I met her recently. Today it was officially declared by the university. I told her about my job related tour to Alaska soon. She told me about her academic tour to Britain. She is a linguist and an admirable human being. Had my lunch by 1:30 and scanned today’s dailies for some time at the hotel. Returned to my room and spent reading the remaining part of Eenadu. Rested from 3:30 to 5:30. Went down by 6:00 to sit and spend talking with the hostel supervisor. “Excessive freedom given to youth in the cities and the consequent degradation of ethics in India” was the topic of the discussion. Went to sleep by 10:30.

23 July (Wednesday)

Woke up by 6:00. Went out and had my breakfast by 8:30. Bought a copy of Eenadu and returned to my room by 9:00. Spent reading it from 9:30 to 12:30. Had my light lunch by 1:30. I eat a small amount of rice. It has been my habit for long. I got into this habit since the day I knew that Lakshmi, my center of admiration, during my Intermediate days, eats small amount of food. She was a goddess of beauty and inspired me deeply with her platonic love and helpless struggle for me. The period of my admiration for her might be short but its influences and memories live long and go deep into my heart. I regret that I was born and I pity the life that is bound to disappear one day. These sweet innermost memories are like chronic psychological disorders which disturb one’s balance of mind frequently. Somebody should erase those stains of pain from my psyche with her rain of love for me. Morning and afternoon spent reading Manorama yearbook for some time. From 6:00 to 8:30 discussed the topics of mutual interest with our hostel supervisor. When returning after my supper in the hotel, a shower of rain chased me. Thanks to God. Went to sleep by 12:00 after some reading and thinking.

24 July (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning low fever caught me. I did not like to take tablets. Spent all the day casually. By night the fever spread across my body and started showing its intentional impact upon me. It was cold outside. Showers of rain were tickling the earth. In my room, I struggled hard to enter the arena of sleep. My body felt very chilled. I remained sleepless throughout the night. Some force in my body kept me shivering and turning this side and that side all the night. This is my age when I have to lead a happy life with care from my dear ones and love from my sweetheart. The gales of my destiny are crushing me in the ashes of reasonable but unfulfilled desires. The spirit of solitude has been haunting me like a cruel eagle. How long does this segregation from human pleasures torment me in the dust of disgust? Human suffering is a question. There are no clear and reliable answers. Life cycle is a curse. One must ride it in the paths of fatal nights and chasing fears also.

25 July (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30 from the lap of frailty believing that life is meant to march toward death. My body that could fence my soul all these years turned out into a fragile entity during the attack of this minor health disorder. The entire world is looking weak and defective. Yet I put in something with the hope that it can restore my constitution. There are many doctors in the city. My worsening financial condition prevents me from consulting a doctor. Bought casual, optional and remedial tablets from a medical store. My rich fever does not surrender to their poor ingredients. My hostel mate prescribed some antibiotic and related tablets for me to drive the villains away. By evening a little cure was pragmatically felt through the belt of my living cells. I don’t know whether I have a healthy and sound body or not. I can stay a whole night sleepless if I think that I am going to lose a treasure of pleasure due to my sleep but the next morning I look like a ghost. Why these poisonous serpents around the infant of sensitive human life? I could sleep for some time after midnight.

26 July (Saturday)

Woke up by 6:00. Reading Eenadu is going on despite my weakened body and spirit. It has been the only real companion for me these days. There is a musical night at Ravindra Bharati in which the noted Telugu playback singer S P Sailaja sings select melodious songs on the occasion of her having completed 25 years of life as a singer. My heart desperately requested me to feast it over those invaluable moments. Two private agencies are sponsoring this event. I don’t know if there is a ticket or it is an “Entry by Invitation Only”. In both the cases, I am helpless. The responsible villains are my fever and rain. Stars are made by admirers in sports and films. Then the tragedy is that they turn inaccessible to these poor creatures like me. All can’t be rich but develop and run after their ambitions and dreams. This friction among human beings segregates them into different divisions. Universal fraternity is a virtue based on ideals. They are often unreal and impracticable. Weakness caused by sickness hastens to mask the mental balance. I struggled hard to control my currents of thoughts. Went to sleep by 3:00.

27 July (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent all the day suffering from fever. I did not like to eat anything or go outside. The world looks morbid and tragic when one is sick. The name of Lord Gopal follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare.
28 July (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. I sense that my visitor deserted me voluntarily leaving my active senses back in my hold. Today I tried to have my breakfast and lunch nominally. Today is one of the historical days in my life. Morning I started listening to an audio cassette playing it on my Walkman of Sony Corporation. From 8:30 to 10:00 listened to the mandolin recording of U Srinivas. It is a masterpiece forming part of the classical music of India. I am a devoted listener of music and songs. To own a 1200-rupee worth Walkman looks like a heaven for me. I played it using the batteries energized by my Eveready charger. I bought this Walkman a few days ago in Hyderabad and kept it hidden to use it in Alaska only for entertainment during my fish packaging work or after it. It is thus reserved for my formal inauguration and use in the U.S. only. Somehow I felt like opening it here only to see my time passing like breezes. For a solitary entity like me, attachments are necessary. Walkman relieves me from the blows of daily worries. Now I have about 50 recorded audio cassettes in my collection. This Walkman is equipped with FM and AM radio features also. Went to sleep by 10:30.

29 July (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. My body is still sensing symptoms of fever. Morning washed a pair of clothes. The sun was bright outside. I am a lover of sun god. As long as He brightly shines in the welkin, my spirit of thoughts and activities functions dynamically. I am scared of water sources like ponds, rivers and seas. This fear might be because of my failure to learn swimming. Air is a very close friend to me. I like to be marooned deep in forests to absolutely feel lonely. Night is my sweetheart. Its advent and presence turn my psyche ideal, vibrant, creative and compassionate. Innumerable thoughts of diversity intensely cross my mind never giving my needed peace. I have to engage myself in some soothing activity to get rid of this creativity. This world of beauty looks more tempting and consoling during night. Ask me to see a heaven in a rivulet in a moonlit night, my mind jumps with bliss. Homesickness and lovesickness are two associated chapters in my beautiful book of life at night. Life looks unbearable without relatives and centers of admiration. I have been a victim to all these. Went to sleep by 11:00 for my dreams.

30 July (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Freshened up myself soon and came out by 9:00. The F1 room was locked by the hostel supervisor. Held my bag of luggage and took an Express bus to Secunderabad railway station. Somebody attended my pocket and stole a 100-rupee note. In my present financial condition, this loss is very considerable. Reached the rented portion of my friend Veeranjaneyulu in Journalist Colony ‘A’ by 10:30. The spacious hall facing the entrance is bejewelled with the great paintings of this artist. Right now he is engaged in sketching the paintings of the Ramayana series. Six symbolic episodes of this great Hindu epic are being worked on for the head office of his client Raghu Rama Raju. All the six works are almost over. Each one is a marvel. There is that exquisite Indianness and attraction in the faces of Lord Rama, Goddess Sita, Lakshmana, Bharata, Viswamitra and others. I enjoyed watching their spectacular artistic beauty. This set of six paintings cost 30,000 rupees. It was cold outside today. By 8:30 our common friend Kuracha Srinivasa Rao (Bhayya) came here from the HCU campus. All of us spent talking among ourselves for more than two hours. He said that my M.A. classmate Vijaya Krishna is in the campus. He left for the campus by 11:00 on his friend’s bike. Went to sleep by 11:30.

31 July (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent reading Eenadu for some time. Ate a good amount of jaggery from the kitchen of my friend Veeru. Listened to Telugu cine songs for some time. Got ready with my luggage by 11:30. Had my lunch by 12:30 prepared by the room associates of Veeranjaneyulu. Before that, wrote a bit of comedy script for my friend Uttharaandhra Trinath (his name in films). I found it difficult to compose written track for film comedy. Above all, my tendency is not toward comedy. Human life is serious and tragic in my view. Took leave of them and stepped out of his abode by 12:45. Waited for my expected bus at the junction of Journalist Colony ‘A’. Took a city bus to Kothi by 1:30. Reached Mahatma Gandhi Bus Station by 2:30. All the seats in the Visakhapatnam bound Hitech bus were already reserved by others. So, I took a Vijayawada bound Express bus. It started off by 3:00. Reached Vijayawada by 9:00. Took an Express bus to Eluru from there. By 10:30 it was at its destination. Thence took an Express bus to Rajahmundry. Thence took an Express bus to Jaggampeta and reached there by 5:00 (tomorrow morning). I sat in the bus stand there waiting for one hour for the ordinary bus to go to Gollalagunta.

1 August (Friday)

When I was waiting to go to Gollalagunta at the bus stand in Jaggampeta, my uncle Varma, my cousin Anantha Lakshmi and some other relatives came from Gollalagunta. They were all on their way to Rajahmundry to take a holy dip in the River Godavari during this Godavari Pushkaram (an occasion that occurs once for every twelve years). I too joined them. We reached Rajahmundry by 8:00 by bus. It started pouring. We sheltered ourselves in a filling station by the main road for more than half an hour. It was still drizzling due to depression over the Bay of Bengal. We ventured out. We turned completely wet by the time we reached the holy waters of the Godavari. The visitors there were already wet. So, we did not feel detached from rest of the people. I liked the beauty of a girl in a Punjabi dress. She also got wet in the drizzle. All of us took three holy dips in the water at the three important Bath Ghats including the specially built up Shiva Linga structure. My first pushkaram bath took place in this river here in 1979 under the supervision of my parents, the second one in 1991 in the company of my brother Sambha and this third one in 2003 in association with my relatives. Fourth one may take place in 2015 along with my wife and children. We had our homemade lunch under the huge tent in the Arts College Ground. We returned to Gollalagunta by 3:00. Spent rest of the day casually. Went to sleep by 9:00.

2 August (Saturday)

Woke up by 6:30. It was cold and drizzly till afternoon. Then my uncle Varma and I started to Jaggampeta on a bicycle. We went to cinema Krishnaveni and saw the Telugu feature film “Hrudayanjali” in the matinee show. Girija is the heroine in this film. I have been one of the admirers of this actress ever since I saw her moving performance in the Telugu film “Gitanjali” of Nagarjuna. Her face looks innocent and attractive to viewers. Hrudayanjali portrayed her as a victim of child abuse and the consequent unrest in her married life. She wants to enjoy her conjugal life with her husband but fails due to her haunting psychic disorders imprinted on her mind in her childhood. There is a continuous internal struggle in the girl throughout the film. All this ends with her death in the climax. I was disturbed seeing the girl in such pathetic role throughout. I can’t witness a beautiful girl suffering like that. I pitied her throughout. Girija is a classic image in my world of admiration. I sadly watched this film. May Lord Krishna bless her with a long life. Went to sleep by 10:30.

3 August (Sunday)

Woke up by 6:00. Spent all the day casually. The name of Lord Krishna follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 9:30.

4 August (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Stayed at home till 12:30 listening to Telugu cine songs on my Walkman. Had my lunch by 1:00 and rested from 1:30 to 2:00. My teacher uncle Venkata Rama Raju came to the house of his friend Narasimha Murthy Raju and sent a word for me to meet him to talk about the issue of my journey to Alaska. I told him that my journey is postponed to the last week of this month due to an unspecified problem on part of the consultancy in Secunderabad. He told me to wait till the given date and then react properly. His tendency is to view the darker side of an issue and warn others. I felt worried after the discussion of this issue with him. Went to the house of my maternal grandfather Appala Raju by 2:30. Watched the Telugu feature film “Sarada” from 3:00 to 5:30 on their television. It is a great film directed by my favorite director Kasinadhuni Viswanath. I could not see the climax due to power cut. Evening my cousin Anantha Lakshmi prepared a bread of palmyra fruit juice. It is tasty and nutritious. Night listened to Telugu cine songs for one hour. Went to sleep by 10:30.

5 August (Tuesday)

Woke up by 6:00. My brother Sambha and sister-in-law Kranti came here last night from Rajahmundry. They took their holy dip in the River Godavari and came here to see my uncle and cousin. They were tired and sleepy. So, they freshened up themselves and rested till 12:00. It was cold and cloudy. I enjoyed it myself. Went to our recently bought rice farms by 1:30 along with my uncle Varma. My father bought three acres of farmland, my brother Srinivas bought two acres of farmland and my brother Sambha bought one acre of farmland here. It was drizzling. There is enough water in Gopala Raju Pond under which irrigation area these paddy fields fall. The farmers around our farms were ploughing their wet farms to sow young rice plants soon as part of the initial stage of the cultivation of paddy. Our rice farms would be ploughed soon when the water is allocated from this common pond when our turn comes. We saw seven deer grazing in the empty paddy fields there. They were very cute. They stared at us with awe from distance. When we moved to reach them, they ran away. We returned home by 6:00. Night talked with my folks for some time. Went to sleep by 9:30.

6 August (Wednesday)

Woke up by 6:00. My maternal uncle Krishnam Raju asked my brother Sambha and sister-in-law Kranti to stay here for two more days. My uncle Varma and I went to the agricultural land of the prior by 9:30. The fellow that gave him word to come to plough his wet land today did not turn up. We stayed there for two hours and carried out the work of uprooting unwanted green grass from the soil in the crop. There is the crop of high breed sago plants in this farm now. It is a profitable crop for farmers in this area. Sago is made from the white liquid essence of these tubers in mills. We returned home by 12:30 and had our lunch. Started to our rice farms near the Dora Pond and Gopala Raju Pond by 1:00. We went there to supervise the flow of water from the pond to our farms. The appointed supervisor of the pond did not release our share of water yet as said earlier and so we were disappointed. It was drizzling. Farm workers were engaged in planting the young rice plants into the wet and tilled soil. We met the supervisor of the pond and finalized the date of release of water to our farms. We carried out the work of uprooting weeds from on the bunds of our rice farms for one hour. We returned home by 6:00. Washed a pair of clothes at the hand pump and took a bath there by 7:30. Night spent talking with my folks for some time. Went to sleep by 9:30.

7 August (Thursday)

Woke up by 6:00. Went to the agricultural farm of my uncle Varma by 8:00. He employed a boy to plough his land and remove weeds from the crop. Incidentally that boy was one of my friends from the school in Gollalagunta. He is about 25 now. He is married, begot two children and his wife recently underwent tubectomy. He lived a satisfactory life of youth. I felt very happy to know about his lifestyle. He earns enough to look after his wife and two children. According to the Hindu system of community classification, he belongs to Uppara community. His father earned ten acres of farmland. This boy buys one acre of farmland every year with the savings of his hard work. As an educated creature, I wear pants and shirts in an impressive manner. He puts on ordinary clothes to save his body from sun and rain. In comparative analysis, he is a man of soil and toil and I am a man of knowledge and hypocritical society. Afternoon met my uncle Ramu of Bhoopalapatnam. He came here to meet my teacher uncle Venkata Rama Raju in Jaggampeta on some work. We went to Jaggampeta and met him. Returned home by 6:30. Did reading for some time. Went to sleep by 10:30.

8 August (Friday)

Woke up by 6:00. It started raining since this early morning. I washed two pairs of my clothes and put them out to dry. I found the bathroom and toilets somewhat dirty here. So, washed them with water until they wore a neat look. My uncle Varma left for the watering work of our rice farms by 8:30. I stayed back at home fearing the slippery paths to these paddy fields due to rain. Spent reading the recent copies of India Today for some time. Today it is “Sraavana Sukravaaram” (an auspicious day). Recently married Hindu girls observe this day with special attention and reverence. They worship Goddess Lakshmi today seeking Her blessings for the welfare of their husbands and relatives. They prepare special dishes for this formal occasion of worship. My cousin Anantha Lakshmi too performed worship in a traditional manner. The worshipper should not eat anything until this formal worship is over. I read out 108 mantras from a book and the related story of this holy occasion for this formal worship by my cousin. She prepared sweet dishes. I ate them with special interest. Night listened to Telugu cine songs on my Walkman. Went to sleep by 9:30. Night a symbolic dream of my past relationships played in the subconscious arena of my mind.

9 August (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Stayed at home till 12:00. Spent reading India Today and listening to songs on my Walkman. Had my lunch by 12:30 and went to our rice farms along with my uncle Varma. Today our three acres of farmland is being ploughed and young rice plants are being planted simultaneously. Twenty-one men were employed to deftly pull out young rice plants. Eight men were for levelling the bunds of the farm with their farm tools. Forty-two women were for planting young rice plants into the ploughed and softened soil of the farm. It was an interesting scene for me. These are the men and women of soil. They don’t sell their farmlands unless misfortunes befall them. Millions of rupees may be burnt within seconds but not these fertile farms. These workers and land owners have been associated with these farms for decades. These farmers are largely dependent on the proclivities of nature. Rainfall and sunshine must contribute in time for the success of these crops. The livelihoods of these people are thus at the mercy of Indian climate. Returned home by 6:30. My cousin Narendra Varma came from Kakinada and my uncle Chanti Babu came from Durgada. Had our supper and spent talking among ourselves about our domestic affairs. Went to sleep by 9:30.

10 August (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. By 10:00 reached Jaggampeta in an auto rickshaw. Today my cousin Raghupati celebrated his first wedding anniversary along with his wife. Many were invited to this function. His brother Kiran too came from Hyderabad. I spent there from 10:00 to 5:00. Returned home by 6:30. The name of Lord Krishna follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 10:30.

11 August (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning read a recent copy of India Today till 11:00. Rested for some time. My uncle Varma returned from Jaggampeta by 12:30 and told me about his disappointing experience at the State Bank of India. Bank staff is indifferent to their customers from villages. They behave like the lords of the bank and treat their customers as helpless dependents on their judgment, orders and mercy. My experiences too have been the same with this institution so far, in villages in particular. Now many depend on banks for their financial needs. The ironical fact is these comfortable idiots make profits doing business with the same customers whom they treat as untouchable creatures. An ordinary man seldom gets any favor from these commercial banks. The purpose of these banks is to help the rich become richer. Majority loans made by these exploitative banks signify this bitter reality. I wrote a complaint letter to the Regional Manager of State Bank of India on behalf of my uncle. Spent my time in the company of my teacher uncle Venkata Rama Raju from 2:30 to 4:30 at Zilla Parishad High School in Gollalagunta. Went to sleep by 9:30.

12 August (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Started to Jaggampeta by 9:30 on a bicycle. My uncle Varma already reached there on a scooter of his familiar one. I reached there by 10:00. Even today he faced inconvenience from the staff of State Bank of India in taking out an agriculture loan pledging his domestic gold ornaments. We went to a shop and gave a ceiling fan for the repair of its bearings. Then I gave the manuscript of the complaint letter (addressed to the bank idiots) to be typed up and printed on an inkjet printer at a computer center. Thence we went to cinema Sri Krishna and saw the Telugu feature film “Vasantham” of Venkatesh. It has a weak story but the presentation is attractive. After coming out from the cinema, we discovered that my cousin Anantha Lakshmi and my cousin Narendra Varma also saw the same film in the same cinema in the same show. Naren went back to Kakinada. Rest of us returned home by 4:00. Posted the complaint letter to the Regional Manager in Visakhapatnam on the careless work of the staff of State Bank of India in its Jaggampeta branch. From 5:00 to 6:00 my uncle Varma and I spent checking the health of growing rice plants in our farms. On our way back, I called up my folks in Peda Gummuluru and enquired about their well-being. Night listened to radio for some time. Went to sleep by 10:00.

13 August (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. My maternal uncle Krishnam Raju brought cow milk from somewhere for preparation of cheese. Morning it was drizzly. So, I preferred staying at home. Rain is wanted for dry crops but not for road users in villages. My trousers got muddy recently during my journey to Jaggampeta. Be it on a bicycle or in an auto rickshaw, this occurrence is inevitable. Went to the government high school in Gollalagunta by 11:00 and met my teacher uncle Venkata Rama Raju. He said that intelligence is a genetic factor, based on his bitter experiences with many students over the years as a schoolteacher. He did not agree with my personal view that external environment plays a great role in moulding the character of anybody. We have differences of opinion on this issue. I believe that family, environment, financial conditions and friends play an important role in influencing and shaping the personality of a young learner. One becomes a great person by one’s individual effort and also being influenced by the external factors around one. One need not be a born miracle to achieve heights of reputation or success. I think the values and commitments based on which one builds up one’s life decide the happiness, sorrow, success or failure of one. Returned home by 1:30 and had my lunch. Spent rest of the day casually at home. Went to sleep by 9:00.

14 August (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Got ready soon and went to the bus stop opposite Soorayya’s kirana shop by 8:30. My cousin Anantha Lakshmi, her son Vivekananda Varma and I are going to the house of my uncle Chanti Babu in Durgada. When we were waiting for the bus, two familiar ones came behind us and dropped us in Jaggampeta on their bikes for courtesy. We walked to bus stand and waited for our expected bus from 10:00 to 10:30. We took an Annavaram bound ordinary bus for Kathipudi. We got off it there and took an auto rickshaw up to the road junction that leads to Durgada. Thence we took another auto rickshaw. We reached the house of my uncle by 12:10. By that time my maternal aunt Surya Bhaskaramma and my cousin Sirisha were on their siesta in the thatched hut where their daily casual cooking takes place. They readily served us lunch which must have been kept for them. My uncle and his mother went to Visakhapatnam to deal with a theft case which occurred in the house of one of their relatives. Durgada developed into a big village now with many houses. The internal roads are good. There is dire water crisis in this village. Groundwater level is very low. So, their wells went dry. Night took a bath at the hand pump near the temple of Lord Shiva. Went to sleep by 10:30.

15 August (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Today it is the 56th Independence Day of India. These days celebration of these historical events became formal show events. Hypocrites act as if they are fighting for the cause of the nation but the fact is that very few are really committed to the ideals for which the freedom fighters struggled and died one day. Today I did not stir out of this village. Today it is the third “Sraavana Sukravaaram” and so my aunt performed her special worship to Goddess Lakshmi. She prepared special dishes for this occasion. In the name of all those gods and goddesses, we ate them with special interest. Morning spent watching television. Afternoon went to the nearby Durgada Railway Gate and spent there for some time. Took the Telugu novella Barrister Paarvatheesam along with me and read one of its chapters titled “Entry to England”. It is an engaging read describing his innocent and eventful trip to England. Afternoon watched the Telugu feature film “Vachchinavaadu Sooryudu” on television. My friend Lakshmi Lahari could be seen in this film. She is there in me. This film disturbed me reminding my admiration and madness for her once. Went to sleep by 9:30.

16 August (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Freshened up myself soon and went out to take an auto rickshaw up to the temple of Goddess Satthamma by the road to Kakinada. Reached there by 8:30. Bought five items of the holy sweet at this temple to take to the house of my uncle Narasimha Murthy. I met Bachchu Nanaji, one of my A P Residential School classmates, in the APSRTC bus, bound to Tuni, which I took at this temple. He told me that he is looking for a government job because he could not find stability and security in private jobs. I felt very happy to see him after a decade. We parted at Kathipudi. I got off it by the road near Tetagunta and walked to the house of my paternal uncle Narasimha Murthy. My aunt Vimala treated me affectionately throughout. My uncle and I went to a nearby coconut grove in which there is banana garden also. He told me about his seven years of life in this village, confronting difficulties, partly created by my teacher uncle Venkata Rama Raju. Had my lunch by 12:30 and took a nap for a while. Called up my friend Veeranjaneyulu in Hyderabad by 2:00 and knew about my probable journey to Alaska by the end of this month. My aunt Raja Kumari called me up from Raja Venkata Nagaram. My uncle and I came to the main road. He was going to Adduroad. I returned to Durgada by 6:30. Went to sleep by 10:30.

17 August (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. By 9:00 my cousin Hari (of Durgada) came from Kakinada. By 1:00 left for Gollalagunta along with my cousin Anantha Lakshmi. We reached there by 4:30. It was very hot. Went to our mango garden along with my uncle Varma. We returned home by 6:00. The name of Lord Krishna follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 9:30.

18 August (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning washed a pair of my clothes. Went to the government high school in Gollalagunta by 10:30 to talk with my teacher uncle Venkata Rama Raju about the recommendation letter to be collected by him from the M.L.A. of Jaggampeta for my cousin Narendra Varma, who wants to utilize a free food service from a voluntary organization in Kakinada, which is very near to Andhra Polytechnic, where he is doing his diploma in Mechanical Engineering now. Jyothula Nehru is supposed to give a recommendation letter addressing the M S N Charitable Organization. Afternoon I met my teacher uncle once again. Returned home by 1:30. I reached Jaggampeta by 4:30 on the Kinetic Luna of this uncle. He already went there in the car of his friend Fakir Raju. We met at the Mandal Development Office in Jaggampeta. We have to get the recommendation letter from the M.L.A. there. We waited there till 6:00 for this fellow. There was no news of his arrival this evening to this office. I returned home by 7:00 in the car of Fakir Raju. By then my cousin Hari came from Tank Bead. I knew from him that the domestic affairs at our home in Peda Gummuluru are bad as usual. They are unable to establish and sustain harmony among themselves. I pity their ignorance and eccentricity. Night listened to songs. Went to sleep by 10:00.

19 August (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Washed a pair of my clothes and took a bath. Got ready soon, walked to the bus stop opposite Soorayya’s kirana shop and took an auto rickshaw to Jaggampeta. Bought eight oranges for my sister-in-law Sowjanya and took Molleru bound ordinary bus by 9:20 from the bus stand. It took me via the temple of Goddess Singaramma (the presiding deity over the surrounding area) near Mallisala. Reached the house of my aunt Lakshmi by 10:30 in Molleru Mallavaram. My uncle Satya Narayana Raju was also there. Sowjanya is happy with her little creature. She gave birth to a baby girl on the 21st of this June. My aunt Lakshmi is busy taking care of her little granddaughter. Poverty has been reining their family for the last ten years. This uncle spends playing cards if there is some money on him and rarely minds earning something for his family. I spent talking with my uncle, my aunt and Sowjanya from 11:00 to 2:30. Had my lunch by 12:30 in between. Spent talking with my uncle Krishnam Raju from 2:30 to 3:30. Started back to Jaggampeta by 4:00 taking a bus from Mallavaram. It came via Bhoopatipalem. Reserved a seat in Visakhapatnam-Hyderabad Hitech bus from Jaggampeta for the evening on next Thursday. Reached Gollalagunta by 6:00. Went to sleep by 10:00.

20 August (Wednesday)

Woke up by 6:00. Went to Jaggampeta by 10:00 along with my uncle Varma on his bicycle. He has to take out a gold loan from the State Bank of India to meet his present agricultural expenses. They took three hours and gave him 9500 rupees. Fifty grams of gold ornaments of my cousin Ananta Lakshmi were pledged for this loan which value about 25,000 rupees. Peasant farmers like my uncle largely depend on these loans by banks during agricultural season. We had onion dosa in a hotel by the main road for our lunch. Then we went to cinema Venkata Ratnam and saw the Telugu feature film “Police Karthavyam” acted and directed by Arjun. This film advises parents to take special care of their young children, who may resort to terrorism out of frustration. After seeing this film, my uncle went back to Gollalagunta. I waited at Rajaveni Junction to meet my teacher uncle Venkata Rama Raju, who comes back to Jaggampeta from the school in Gollalagunta. Somebody told me that he had already gone. Returned home by 6:30 by bus. Night spent talking with my uncle Varma and my cousin Bala. Recently cold caught me. My nose is the victim. Went to sleep by 10:00.

21 August (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Got ready with my luggage by 11:30. My cousin Bala came by 12:00. Had my lunch by 12:30. Took leave of my cousin Anantha Lakshmi, my cousin Bala, my maternal grandmother and walked to the kirana shop of Soorayya along with my uncle Varma. He kept my bag on his bicycle. By 1:30 took an auto rickshaw to Jaggampeta and bade farewell to Gollalagunta, the main stay point of my 20-day long visit to this region. Put my bag in the office of ANL-APSRTC Parcel in the bus stand and went to the house of my teacher uncle Venkata Rama Raju in Teachers’ Colony by 2:30. This morning only his youngest son Kiran came from Hyderabad. He came here for a stay of about two months to prepare for his C.A. Inter exams due in the coming November. He is simultaneously doing his regular B.Com. course from Badruka College of Commerce in Kachiguda. Both of us spent talking about the oddities of common human relationships in the modern world. His father came from the school in Gollalagunta by 7:30. I had my supper in their house. Kiran dropped me at the bus stand by 8:00 on his father’s Kinetic Luna. Took Visakhapatnam-Hyderabad Hitech bus by 10:00 to Hyderabad.

22 August (Friday)

Got off the bus at Mahatma Gandhi Bus Complex in Hyderabad by 9:30. It was drizzling irregularly due to depression over the Bay of Bengal. Walked to a nearby bus halt point and took a city bus up to Six Number Road at Amberpet. From there took an auto rickshaw to DD Colony by Shivam Road. It started drizzling after I got into this auto rickshaw. I felt happy. I like to be drenched in rain when there is nobody around. Now there is no freedom for man to behave the way he likes. The creatures of modern society consider a man bathing in rain somewhat abnormal. I felt as if the drizzle was welcoming me back to Hyderabad. Entered my room in Kshatriya Seva Samithi Hostel by 11:00. Felt very tired due to the sleepless journey last night. Freshened up myself soon and drank water. Ate one round of homemade sesame sweet (called Chimmili in Telugu). Elders warned me against drinking water before or soon after eating this sweet. Motions developed in my bowels eventually. This made me adequately weak. Took tablets to counter this internal attack. Spent all the day within the hostel resting and listening to radio. Went to sleep by 9:30. 

23 August (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Today is the day I have been waiting for the last 60 days. Freshened up myself soon and started to Secunderabad by a city bus from Shivam Road. Reached my destination by 9:30. Walked a bit from Rethifile Bus Stand toward Hotel Rama Krishna and had my breakfast at an eatery by road there. It was drizzly. Entered Room No. 509 in the Fifth Floor of Archana Arcade in which the office of M.S.R. International Placements is housed. It was 10:00. The four girls at the reception counter by the entrance were busy responding to the inquisitive questions of candidates asking details about the overseas jobs from the other end. Sensing my presence in the office, M S Raju, the managing director of this consultancy, contacted me over telephone and informed me to come to this office some time toward the end of this month. I was taken aback to receive this news from him foreseeing my further delayed journey to Alaska. Receptionist Anuradha told me that the work permit would be received very soon from Alaska and it would be stamped soon at the American Consulate in Chennai after which we would be sent to Alaska by the 9th of next month. Went to the rented portion of my friend Veeranjaneyulu at Journalist Colony ‘A’ in Jubilee Hills and spent there for this night. Went to sleep by 10:00.

24 August (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent all the time within the abode of Veeru. By 11:00 my cousin Hari (of Durgada) came from Kakinada. The name of Lord Krishna follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 11:00.

25 August (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent reading Eenadu from 8:00 to 9:00. Went to Krishna Nagar and got a manuscript of application form (written by me for my friend) meant for matrimonial responses typed up and printed at a computer center for Veeranjaneyulu. Posted my reply letter (on behalf of Veeranjaneyulu) to a Visakhapatnam based Kshatriya family who advertised in Eenadu one month ago seeking a bridegroom for their daughter. My cousin Hari (son of my uncle Chanti Babu in Durgada) and I had our lunch in my friend’s abode and started there by 1:30. We took a city bus and reached Kothi by 4:00. There we had one glass of sugarcane juice. We took an auto rickshaw and reached Kshatriya Seva Samithi Hostel in DD Colony. The hostel supervisor did not allow my cousin inside. Both of us left for Ravindra Bharati by 5:00. From 6:30 to 9:15 we watched the Telugu stage play “Prajaa Naayakudu Prakaasham” presented by “Rasa Ranjani”, a noted cultural organization in Hyderabad. It is their 25th presentation of the same play with the same cast. This presentation was extraordinary. We waited for a Shivam Road bound city bus standing by the office of Hyderabad Radio Station. Soon we discovered that we were at a wrong spot of wait. So, we walked to the nearby Secretariat Bus Stop. We walked from Tilak Nagar Junction. We walked much. We did not have our supper. Went to sleep by 11:00.

26 August (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Went to Hotel Greenlands by Shivam Road and had a plate of purees. Came back to my hostel room and preferred staying inside listening to radio. This morning my cousin Hari left for Bowenpally to attend a Screening Test of the Indian Navy. He is looking for a good job. However, he does not look like a disciplined boy to me in pursuit of ‘search for a good job’. This afternoon I did not have my lunch with visionary outlook. My consultant delayed for more than three months in sending me to Alaska for my fish packing job. This heavy delay badly affected my financial conditions. Only God has to save me from this problem. By 2:30 a Kshatriya fellow called up our hostel supervisor and enquired him about the availability of any creature here with B Positive blood group. A poor patient needs that blood in the CARE Hospital at Banjara Hills. I readily agreed to donate my blood for her. I rushed to this hospital and met the mediator. I filled in a formal application form and donated 350 milliliters of my blood. The patient is I Rama Devi from West Godavari district. I did not see her. She is a Kshatriya woman. This hospital also belongs to Somalinga Raju, a fellow of our community. In Andhra Pradesh, caste system helps promote mutual cooperation during times of emergency like this. Took 10 rupees from the mediator as fee for my service to that patient. I should not feel that I gave something valuable to her freely. It is the common practice of a good fellow in India. Went to sleep by 10:30.

27 August (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent most of my time within the hostel room, sleeping for some time, listening to radio for some time and talking with our hostel supervisor for some time. Recently I ate excessive amount of mango jelly which was sent to me by my mother. I know how much hardship she underwent to prepare it during the last summer. She has been suffering from high blood pressure for the last five years. She has problems with her daughter-in-law Kranthi. She has been creating a hell for herself in these circumstances. My father has been a nut, who does not care for anything else except buying agricultural land at the cost of basic needs of our family. Thus my home became a hell for me to live in. I think it is my fate. A highly money-oriented father and an innocent mother being victimized in that environment became a preoccupation of pain and regret for me for the last 15 years. Low fever caught me this morning. The entire world is looking sorrowful and tragic. Night I could not see spectacular Mars in the sky due to undisciplined clouds. They often occupy the sky if an important astronomical occurrence is there to be seen by folks like me. Astronomers stated that it is a historical event in the sky. It was cold outside. Went to sleep by 10:00.  

28 August (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent all the day casually. My mind is very disturbed these days. I dedicate this page to my Lord Krishna to console myself. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 11:00 being pressed by depression.

29 August (Friday)

Woke up by 6:00. All the day stayed within the hostel premises. Evening contacted the M.D. of our consultancy and knew to my despair that I might leave for Alaska in a month’s time. It is intimidating news to my already disturbed mind. I never committed any sin hurting anybody in this life to date. I did not enjoy the pleasures of youth. Poverty and hardships led my life throughout. Money is the most decisive factor of modern human life. Relationships, values, commitments and sentiments seem to be the dull chatter of aimless bohemians. It is not wrong on my part to decide to go to Alaska for earning enough money and strengthen myself financially. Today I see my life as a failure centered on idealism and spirituality. Existence of God and His superiority to living beings seems to be a dreamland of theists that crave for guidance and solace from indistinct entities. The omnipotence and omnipresence of famous Hindu deities seems to be a blind belief created from the frenzy and fantasy of some lunatics like me. The invisible God is supposed to act in my favor now. Otherwise it should be thought that He is nowhere and can do nothing. Went to sleep by 11:00 with depression.

30 August (Saturday)

Woke up by 6:30. Freshened up myself soon and left for Secunderabad by 9:00. Reached the office of our consultancy by 9:30. Waited for the managing director to come till 1:00. Then went out and had my lunch (a plate meal for 12 rupees). Then bought ten small apples for ten rupees. Went back to the office and met M S Raju. He said that our batch of 17 candidates would be sent to Alaska by the last week of next month. I told him that I have been living a poor life in the city and that my financial condition is very bad. I requested him to help me out. He gave me a cheque for 2000 rupees to be encashed at Global Trust Bank in street number 6 in Hubsiguda in Sai Sampada Plaza. I rushed there and got the cash. It was a bundle of 100 new 20-rupee notes. Came back to the hostel by 4:30. Went to a nearby “Easy Movies” agency and asked for a ticket for the latest Telugu film “Boys”. They said that a single ticket won’t be sold. I thought I saved 40 rupees. Came back to the hostel and spent talking with inmates for some time. Had my supper by 9:00 in the hostel sharing a parcel of plate meal with an inmate. Read something for some time. Went to sleep by 11:00.

31 August (Sunday)

Woke up by 6:30. By 9:00 went to the temple of Shirdi Sai Baba at Amberpet along with my friend Anjaneya Raju. By 11:00 both of us reached Uppal. We saw the Telugu feature film “Seethayya” in cinema Sri Krishna in the morning show. We returned to the hostel by 4:00. I rested for some time. By 5:00 we started to Shilparamam at Madhapur. Today it is Vinayaka Chaturdi. On this occasion, they organized a cultural event called “Viswa Vinayaka”. It is a program of Indian classical dances. It was presented by the students of “Temple of Fine Arts”. They are from Malaysia, Australia and India. They are the disciples of Swami Sraddhaanandha. This presentation took place from 7:00 to 8:30. I could not find Indianness in this program. Their motion dominated their emotions. It was extraordinary. We returned to the hostel by 10:00. May Lord Krishna bless me and help me go abroad. May He clear the hurdles in this path. I believe He listens to my appeal. May He bless me with balance of mind. Went to sleep by 11:00.

1 September (Monday)

Woke up by 6:00. Went to a hotel and had my breakfast of two dosas. Came back to the hostel and spent rest of my time listening to radio, reading a Telugu monthly and resting. My thought follows, “The idea and practice of nonviolence looks absurd and abstract from an analytical perspective. Every minute millions of animals and birds are being butchered throughout the world for the meat needs of the peoples. Food for many animals and birds is essentially meat which has to be earned through hunting. Scientists proved that even plants and trees live like other creatures and they suffer when one exploits them for one’s selfish ends. Millions of little creatures are being killed in agricultural farms due to pesticide application. The same is the case with measures of hygiene. Ecosystems in the world are filled with mutual killings and survivals. Terrorism meets the needs of worldwide unrest and resultant nonviolence. Mental torture is prevalent everywhere due to the evil of humanity toward others. We can’t trace even a single minute of nonviolence in the history of the world. These practices are meant for seers and recluses. Ordinary people tend to be violent in their daily activities”. Went to sleep by 10:00.

2 September (Tuesday)

Woke up by 6:00. Spent all the day casually. Evening spent some time with the car driver of a Kshatriya fellow that came to our hostel as a guest from Khammam district. We saw the Telugu film “Simhadri” in cinema Sandhya at RTC Crossroads in the second show. My thought follows, “Death seems to be the destination of human life. The birth of these wise creatures does not occur according to their choices. The progression of life drags them through unexpected events and unforgettable memories. In every stage of human life, desires prevail and dissatisfaction follows. The pleasures of body thrill but the associated forethought of ensuing demise dampens the spirit. Old age is the worst threat to the living world. The beautiful world beckons one to come and enjoy it but the passive and fragile body of the fellow warns him to be cautious of every step ahead. The achievements of human life are mainly birth and death. The place of existence of soul before birth and after the death of a living creature remains a mystery. The materialistic thoughts and acts of a man are myopic and stereotypical. The invitation card of death removes the display board of ‘The Game of Delicate Human Life’ at the shop of the fellow. What a pity!” Went to sleep by 12:45.

3 September (Wednesday)

Woke up by 6:30. Spent all the day casually. My thought follows, “The ultimate beauty of living human world seems to be irresistible fascination between two creatures of opposite sex. The two hearts react calmly and passionately in a civilized society. Admiration between two living beings is extraordinary. Infatuation haunts humans as long as they are among the creatures of their race. Sexual pleasure derived from lust lasts for minutes but the beauty of life based on sensitive admiration and related thoughts and mermories follows till death. Many crave for the prior regularly but wish to witness the latter in others occasionally. Admiration of human beauty is the job of a lifetime. Beauty is a concept of bliss in thought, speech and deed. To live in a world of beauty is to live in a dreamland of bitter lies. Human eyes photograph every beauty that comes across and comment inwardly. Great personalities of art field can see the real body and spirit of great beauty. They admire beauty, serve it passionately and die desperately with those memories. Age between 12 and 52 should be spent chasing the crazy world to squeeze the essence of bliss from it in a sensible way. Lonely and active creatures are suitable for this pursuit. Others are victims of this inbuilt disorder”. Went to sleep by 11:00.

4 September (Thursday)

Woke up by 6:00. Spent all the day casually. This included listening to radio, resting and going out for eating. Night spent in the nearby Shirdi Sai Baba Temple watching Bhajan program from 8:15 to 10:30. I don’t consider Shirdi Sai Baba god. Yet I spent there to enjoy the good atmosphere. My thought follows, “Nature seems to be a bewitching organ of this world. Brooks, ponds, canals, rivers, boulders, peaks, icebergs, oceans and wildlife are attractions to everybody that has a little sense of beauty. This captivating phenomenon seems to be an honorary host for all living beings, arranged and managed by God to please His creatures. Modern man created imbalances in this natural beauty of the world. Uncivilized man treated nature as an admirable and reliable queen. Civilized man treats her as his concubine. When the beloved is young and beautiful, her mad lover squeezes her tenderness out of lust. Such craziness of her lover makes her lifeless and ugly soon. Nature is thus exploited a lot by her evil hunters in the modern age. Imbalance in relationships leads to hardships and pain only”. Went to sleep by 11:00.

5 September (Friday)

Woke up by 6:00. Morning washed a pair of clothes. Spent all the day casually. Today it is “Teachers Day” in India. My thought follows, “The profession of teaching is largely commercialized today. It is due to the present social trends. For 90% of the teachers today, their profession is a way of livelihood. There are hardly any values in this profession today. Students seldom greet their teachers with real respect or reverence for them. In the long run, a student considers his teacher very respectable due to the impact of passage of time only. There are some teachers today who have unethical relationships with their students. Basic instincts force young students into love trap with their teachers. The age factor largely decides the nature of bonds between a teacher and a student. Invasion of technology and profitability thinking in the modern world led to degradation of systems of education. Education is a commodity today. Sellers are professional businessmen. Buyers are their visionary customers. Teaching profession is thus disfigured by these unscrupulous merchants in the modern society. It is a business field now for many”. Went to sleep by 11:00.

6 September (Saturday)

Woke up by 6:00. Spent all the day casually. By this evening, my monthly mess card of Shirdi Sai Baba Hotel came to an end. I have been using it since the 16th of this July. Daily going to this hotel and having my food there has been a pleasure for me. This hotel resounds with Hindu devotional songs. The serving boys are affectionate toward me. The 30 tokens of plate meal cost 550 rupees. One should use them within a span of two months’ time. My thought follows, “Sensitive and sensible love relationships of today’s youth are the central attraction of the modern age. I can’t bear a traditional society that decides everything for their younger ones. I dislike love that develops on the grounds of lust. There are brothels for such people who consider sensual pleasures as the main attraction of human relationships. Real lovers are like children and old people. They can’t live happily for long in the absence of the other. They are two in number and may belong to any sex. Their commendable fascination blossoms when they are about ten and it dies around 50. Their tombs must be erected side by side”. Night listened to radio. Went to sleep by 10:30.

7 September (Sunday)

Woke up by 6:00. Spent all the day casually. Today is the last day in the 27th year of my life. When I look back, I observe one considerable thing; I could not find even a single girl to love me. Human heart can’t beat longer without the love of beloved. My youth resembles a desert. I enjoy films and songs describing love because I could not get it from girls. I don’t know how long I should lead this kind of life. I am an admirer of beauty. Then I am a spiritually oriented person. Beauty is spread in all the corners around me. God never appears to me. Beauty lives in my eyes until I die. May be beauty is the creation of God. I may not be physically that handsome but my heart is mad after beauty. I want a beautiful girl to admire. An ordinary girl can’t understand or inspire my sense of admiration. My life becomes worthwhile and enjoyable when I get such girl. Some girl must be there to love me in this world. Otherwise my life turns uglier than death. Night listened to Telugu cine songs. Went to sleep by 11:00.

8 September (Monday)

Woke up by 6:00. Today it is my birthday. I start the journey of 28th year of my life. My maternal grandfather Subba Raju recorded our dates of birth carefully. He was a bit expert with Telugu calendar. His soul recently left his present form of physical abode. I owe a lot to him. Eight seems to be the most dominating number in the process of my life. I hope the blessings of my parents stay with me. There is nothing to write about my life excluding my Lord Krishna. When I look back, it seems He guided me carefully and affectionately. Even today I consider myself an innocent and helpless kid dependent on His mercy and guidance. My body and mind are not competitive enough to withstand the evil forces of modern civilization and culture. God cares and guides helpless living beings. I am happy to be in His jurisdiction. I pray Lord Ganesh to guide me with kindness, Mother Saraswati to bless me with enlightenment and Lord Krishna to direct me with love. Night listened to Telugu cine songs. Went to sleep by 10:30.

9 September (Tuesday)

Woke up by 6:00. Spent my daytime listening to radio, reading newspaper, sleeping and talking with our hostel supervisor. Evening went to cinema Aaraadhana at Tarnaka to see a Telugu film. An inmate of our hostel, who is partly friend to me, encouraged me toward this pursuit. I told him to buy his ticket standing in the long queue. When I approached the counter at the eleventh hour, the tickets were over. I felt happy because my expected thing happened. This fellow went to see the Telugu film “Kalyana Ramudu” for the second time without me beside him. We actually planned to go to see the Telugu film “Boys” on show in cinema Mayuri at RTC Crossroads. This guy habitually delayed at the hostel and disturbed my plan. I treated him well with my plot.  Came back to the hostel by 7:00 with a parcel of supper. That fellow of the hotel gave me chicken biryani in the place of fried rice ordered by me. I liked his mistake. By 8:30 my friend Veeranjaneyulu called me up. He said that my father called him up to his cellular phone. He is tense over the delay of my journey to Alaska and the large amount of money at stake. Went to sleep by 10:30.

10 September (Wednesday)

Woke up by 6:00. Spent most of the daytime in the hostel only. By 4:30 left for Journalist Colony ‘A’ in Jubilee Hills by a city bus from Shivam Road. Alighted from it opposite Chermas’ Shop at Ameerpet and took another city bus up to Yousufguda Basti. Thence took an auto rickshaw and reached the rented portion of my friend Veeranjaneyulu. He had just then finished his class to a few students. Nearly five rich girls and women are learning the techniques of Tanjore Style of Painting from him. He does not like anybody entering his instruction hall when his students are practicing there. He has a soft corner for beautiful girls and women. They are valuable assets of India. They expect sensitive behavior toward them from fellow creatures. By 7:00 talked with my parents in Peda Gummuluru using the cellular phone of this friend. I reassured them regarding my eventual journey to Alaska. My brother Sambha and sister-in-law Kranti leave for Ambala Cantonment soon to see those places. Veeranjaneyulu and I saw the Telugu film “Oka Radha Iddaru Krishnula Pelli” in cinema Satyam at Ameerpet in the second show. Went to sleep by 1:00.

11 September (Thursday)

Woke up by 6:30. Freshened up myself by 7:00. My friend Yoganand came by 8:30. Presently he is working as an Art Teacher in Jubilee Hills Public School at a monthly salary of 4000 rupees. I don’t like these schools which target helpless and talented teachers. They pay small salaries and squeeze heavy work from their teachers. Went to cinema Gokul at Erragadda along with two of my friends and saw the Telugu film “Boys” from 11:45 to 2:45. Three heroes and the heroine came into this cinema to greet the viewers as part of the promotional campaign of their film. They stood near the screen. We were all pleased to partly see their figures from distance. They acted well in this film. It is a good film. It portrayed love related issues of modern boys. Boys like to die for their sweethearts. One can purely love a girl when one is dependent on one’s parents. They don’t like it. The consequent struggle by young and innocent lovers to succeed in their love is pitiable. Returned to our hostel by 4:00. Had my supper by 8:00. Went to sleep by 10:30.

12 September (Friday)

Woke up by 6:00. Spent my time casually listening to radio, reading newspaper, talking with our hostel supervisor, resting on mat in my hostel room and occasionally going out for food. Recently I knew from my mother over telephone that our pet dog had passed away some days ago in our cattle shed. I pray God to bless it with a good birth in the next stage of its cycle of births. My brother Sambha brought it from Adduroad to our house in 1993 when we were living in the rented house at Ramayyapatnam. It has been very affectionate and loyal toward us despite our nominal care for it. I know that death is inevitable to every living creature but the tragedy of the humanity is that one has to see many deaths before it occurs to oneself. Death is the most tragic issue for me in this world. A life leaving us forever is the biggest threat to my psyche. I want to see that dog and say that I can’t bear its physical disappearance from me forever but it is impossible. It can’t see how I am suffering for it. I am touched to know that it is no more in this world. Went to sleep by 11:00.

13 September (Saturday)

Woke up by 6:00. Spent all the day casually reading newspaper, talking with our hostel supervisor and resting on mat in my hostel room. Evening went to a nearby audio recording shop and selected about 90 Telugu cine songs for ordering their recording into seven one-hour audio cassettes. Listening to Telugu cine songs has been a matter of relief and bliss for me for the last eight years. It’s a soothing medicine to my turbulent psyche. One can’t be happy in the modern world where many are available but very few are affordable and enjoyable. There are thousands of beautiful girls in India but many boys are suffering in the slums of solitude and lovesickness. Heart knows well how to choose its sweetheart. It likes to speak for some time with its valued asset in this world. It seeks solace from the realization that there is one creature at least in this vast human world devoting some time for it exclusively. There are tons of sweets and fruits in the Indian market but only a few can afford and taste them. Is there fairness in these human affairs and efforts? The answer shall be ‘yes’ for fools. Night listened to a poetry reading by Hoshang Merchant on Hyderabad radio. Went to sleep by 10:30.

14 September (Sunday)

Woke up by 6:30. Stayed indoors till 9:00. These days I am not finding much difference between staying indoors and spending outdoors. Going to Alaska for fish packaging job seems to be an attractive way before me. Unrest rules human life when it lacks the element of money. India is unable to look after all her children. People like me can’t live happily in this knowledge and money driven society. These days one has to steal opportunities from the other inferior ones competing with them in tests and interviews. Living somehow is important for many but living exceptionally is important for a few. The prior enjoy every day and the latter always look for the next day. I know that Alaska is a very cold and dangerous region for an Indian like me to live in. To make one’s life rich, one can’t help facing difficulties in the beginning. The fellow supposed to send me abroad is delaying my journey repeatedly. If one desires to earn a lot of money in a short period of time, one can’t help going abroad. I have to get a beautiful girl to marry. I need a lot of money to foster the flower of life of my wife. I am a crazy guy with many dreams. Lord Krishna has to lead my life. Otherwise it turns passive and ugly. Morning met Yoganand. Night ate three apples. Went to sleep by 11:00 for my dreams.

15 September (Monday)

Woke up by 6:00. Morning washed a pair of clothes. Called up the girls at the reception counter twice between 10:30 and 11:30 to know about the presence of M S Raju in the office. They told me that he would come to the office by 2:00. Went down to Avinash Audio Recording Shop by Shivam Road and collected five recorded audio cassettes paying the remaining amount of money to him. Each 60-minute audio cassette held about 15 Telugu cine songs on its tape. He charged 43 rupees for each cassette. The price of an empty cassette is 25 rupees. Recording charge for each select cine song is 150 paise. Had my lunch in Hotel Shanti by 12:00. Returned to my hostel room by 12:30 and rested for some time. Took a city bus for Secunderabad by 1:00. Met M S Raju in his office by 3:00. He said that the work permit would be received in two days’ time and our journey to Alaska might be in ten days’ time. Took a cheque for 2000 rupees from him for my expenses. Went to the ICICI Bank in Navketan Complex by Clock Tower in Secunderabad and got it encashed. The woman at the Teller counter seems to be a splendid Bengali beauty. Had my supper by 8:00. Went to sleep by 10:30.

16 September (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. My journey to Alaska is scheduled to take place in 15 days’ time at the most. I already took 4000 rupees from M S Raju for my expenses in the city. I allocated 50 rupees per day for my inevitable expenses which include breakfast, lunch, supper, soaps, newspapers and my hostel room rent. The attraction of twin cities is their grand buildings and beautiful girls and women. Most of them pass by in their cars appearing like distant dreams which may melt by a breath touch of admirers like me. I want 100 poets to praise their tender beauty. I am proud to belong to India which has immense beauty in it. It’s our luck to be encircled by passing beauties when we step out. To see and enjoy beauty in any form is not wrong. It does not mean that we hate poor souls who lack enough flesh on their bones. We pity them and help them if possible. Serving the poor smelling a rose cannot be a problem. I feel suffocated with the abundance of female beauty around me. Many are busy fostering their personal assets of beauty. Some keep their bodies for daily sale. These are infectious weeds in the world of beauty. A gentleman can’t appreciate the beauty of an innocent girl before him when ten prostitutes are beckoning him from the other end. Went to sleep by 11:00.

17 September (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent all the day casually. Called up for the managing director of our consultancy thrice from 4:30 to 6:00. He said that the work permit is not yet received from Alaska. Recently I started consuming apples in place of my regular food items like rice. An average south Indian spends much of his money to buy rice. These fellows think that eating more rice means getting more strength. They neglect other essential and nutritional food items. Ours is one of such families. This is why all crave for fruits and other items imported from other regions. Sweet grapes and apples are such fruits for me. I readily show special interest to have them. I like to attend this psychic syndrome giving apples to my spirit of food desires. But, when I go to buy these fruit, I often hesitate to buy the big and red apples fearing their high prices. Apples are affordable for the rich only in many parts of India. The poverty of my genes seldom allows me to buy an apple of ten rupees which is rich in nutritional value. Two apples of this price are equal to a full meal (against a plate meal) at a hotel. Still many Indians are poor and pitiable like me in terms of buying and eating quality seasonal fruits. Went to sleep by 9:30.

18 September (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent all the day casually. Even today there was no positive response from the consultancy. My parents and brothers are very tense over this issue. There is no assuring answer from me for them. For this reason, I did not contact them during the last ten days. To console myself from this disorder, I observe the chant of name of Lord Krishna. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 9:30.

19 September (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Evening attended a function at Ravindra Bharati. It was funded by Subba Rami Reddy on the occasion of his 60th birthday celebrations. I am presently tense over the prevailing disorderly situation of my journey to Alaska. Lord Krishna, responsible for this dismay, is going to be invoked. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Night ate four apples for my supper. Went to sleep by 1:00.

20 September (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Freshened up myself soon and went down Shivam Road. Called up my brother Srinivas at Ambala Cantonment. Nobody picked up the telephone despite my repeated attempts. Called up my folks at home and informed them about the latest bad news of my further delayed journey to Alaska. They are tense over this situation and are planning to ask for the money back. Went to a computer center and typed out a long letter addressing Justice P Ramakrishnam Raju explaining my state of affairs and asking for a solution. When the printouts were given to me, that fellow charged me 100 rupees saying that I used five hours of Internet time. I was disturbed at my mistake. His silence was a sin on his part. Came out by 2:30 and had a plate of vegetable biryani in Shanti Deluxe Hotel. Returned to my hostel room and spent contemplating my tense condition. That filthy pig delayed heavily and created mess in my life. I never hurt anybody intentionally and seldom committed sins as far as I know. I don’t know why my youthful age is being ruined by my fate. Went to sleep by 10:30.

21 September (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent all the day casually. I am disturbed. The name of Lord Krishna follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 11:00.

22 September (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Got ready soon and stepped out by 7:30. Had my breakfast by 8:30 in Hotel Satya. Bought a copy of Eenadu and returned to the hostel. Spent reading this newspaper for a few minutes. Got guidelines from our hostel supervisor and started to the office of Kshatriya Seva Samithi at New Nallakunta by walk. Reached it walking via Shankar Math and Vegetable Market. Met the accountant there and collected the postal address of Justice P Ramakrishnam Raju to send to whom I wrote a letter seeking an expert advice on the issue of my delayed journey to Alaska. Came out and walked to a nearby bus stop to go to Secunderabad. Got down from the bus at Rethifile Bus Stand and posted the letter in the nearby postbox. Went to the office of our consultancy and informed the receptionist Anuradha that I wanted to speak to M S Raju this afternoon. Went out and took an auto rickshaw to a nearby cinema. Saw the Telugu film “Janaki Weds Sriram”. Had a plate of vegetable biryani in Hotel Padmaja opposite Secunderabad railway station by 2:00. Went to the office of our consultancy and met M S Raju. He firmly assured me that he would send me to Alaska in the next month. Went to sleep by 11:00 for my dreams.

23 September (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent most of my time reading newspaper, listening to radio and sleeping on mat in my hostel room. Dreams don’t leave me even in my day sleep. Evening I tried many times to make my father talk with M S Raju of our consultancy. He said that he would keep his cellular phone on between 6:00 and 6:30 this evening on my request to him over telephone this afternoon. When my father and I tried this evening to talk with him, he kept it switched off. This is how he has been torturing us for the last six months ever since we paid him two lakh rupees. When there is a burden of three lakh rupees on my shoulders, when the consultancy has been playing with me like this, I have to resort to my Lord Krishna for solace. If this consultancy cheats me, I have to sell my organs committing suicide. I think God likes it. If these are the tribulations slated to be withstood by me, I am ready to face them. A young life is thus going to be wasted by the grace of God. Night listened to radio. Went to sleep by 11:00.

24 September (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent all the day casually. Evening failed to see that the fellow of the consultancy talks to my father in our village over his cellular phone. Night wrote a four-page letter to my teacher uncle Venkata Rama Raju in Jaggampeta. I did not inform him about the delay of my journey to Alaska ever since I left that place one month ago. We have different views and perceptions about the issues of human life. Once he said that he would help me arranging a loan of one lakh rupees for my career if necessary. He arranged a loan of 60,000 rupees for my venture of fish packaging job in Alaska. When the delay is getting extended and the trustworthiness of the consultancy is looking questionable, he started blaming me for my foolish decision of choosing such consultancy. He said that my attitude and pursuits are always negative. He means that thinking differently leads to unexpected chaos in one’s life and so one should go in the way paved and followed by many. In the modern times, one needs to take on challenges, is what I believe in and act on. I argued my case in this letter. Night bought eight apples for eight rupees for my supper. Went to sleep by 10:30.

25 September (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent my time casually till 3:30. Freshened up myself, stepped out and took a city bus for Lakdi Ka Pool by 4:00. Thence took a city bus up to the small gate of University of Hyderabad. It was 5:30. It was drizzling. I walked to the Shopping Complex. The campus is very beautiful due to rain and clouds in the sky. I felt as if I were walking in a heaven. Reached the central library by 6:00. My friend Colin met me as scheduled earlier by us. He is currently engaged in friendship with Gudrun Seth, our junior in our M.A. English course. Both of us went to Student Center Canteen and spent talking for 20 minutes having sweets. He leaves for his hometown Bangalore on the 28th of this month. He spent in Hyderabad for three academic years doing his M.A. and M.Phil. courses in English literature. It was our farewell meeting in a way. He left the campus by 7:00. I went to Room No. 310 in Men’s Hostel ‘F’ and met Bhayya. Night listened to a religious discourse by Hari Kirtan Das of ISKCON in a hostel room there. Went to sleep by 1:00.

26 September (Friday)

Woke up by 6:00. Had my breakfast and lunch in Men’s Hostel ‘F’ and returned to Kshatriya Seva Samithi Hostel by 3:30. Last night I incidentally attended the discourse of Swami Hari Kirtan Das of ISKCON, a spiritual organization meant for the devotees of Lord Krishna. I was very impressed by the speech of this young saint. He is 27. His spiritual knowledge is extraordinary to his age. He explained the causes of suffering in this world and the remedy for it. I knew that the Vedic tradition of Hinduism is based on four schools, which include Brahma Sampradaya, Sree Sampradaya, Rudra Sampradaya and Kumara Sampradaya. Any philosophy of mainstream Hinduism has to base itself on any one school of these four or it must be considered a worthless branch of Hinduism. This saint belongs to Brahma Sampradaya. He has spiritual ‘Guru’. I found this saint as the real symbol of mainstream Hinduism. He is an authority on mainstream Hinduism. I am happy that I met a divine soul by chance. This organization is going to be my spiritual guide. Thanks to Lord Krishna. Night listened to radio. Went to sleep by 11:00.

27 September (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning washed a pair of clothes. Spent all the day casually. My thought follows, “Teenage seems to be the most misguiding age in terms of bodily impulses. The biological, familial, societal and traditional factors largely influence the psyche of an individual during this period. Birds, beasts and insects have no restrictions in this regard. Marriage is the only social system that allows two individuals to fulfill their mutual physical attractions in a right way. I consider the child marriages in the past right in this respect. When there is a way to fulfill one’s needs in a right way, one does not resort to wrong ways. Modernity is a curse for those that have committed moral values and thus struggling to prove themselves in their lives. Mind might be immersed in thought process but body tortures heavily when night approaches. It’s a persistent desire of the body for a life partner. There are many beautiful girls and handsome boys in the world. If they are good, they don’t think and behave like beasts. Yet, their basic instincts urge them to behave like a beast neglecting the orders of their conscience. This internal friction occurs in all the ages”. Went to sleep by 11:00.

28 September (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. By 9:00 reached the Rethifile Bus Stand in Secunderabad. Today auto rickshaw drivers are observing strike in twin cities. Yet I could get one auto rickshaw. By 9:30 reached Mehboob College by cinema Prashant. Today a marriage meet is taking place here. Brides and bridegrooms may interact with one another under the supervision of their parents. A city based marriage consultancy is organizing this program. There were very few girls. Their parents and relatives were there. I found one girl beautiful among those present. My friend Veeru did not find her considerably beautiful. I came here to help him choose a bride. He returned to his abode in Journalist Colony ‘A’. I came back to the hostel. There are a number of beautiful girls around us on roads. One can’t marry a girl out of them. Presently I am leading a life of frustration and chaos. My heart is in search of a beautiful girl. Only she can console my years of lovesick life. There would be sweetness in her words. There is happiness in walking along with her. There is joy in seeing her smiles. Living or dying for love is a divine concept. I would have been a sinner in my previous birth. No girl is beautifying my life with her proactive love for me. I don’t know whether I get one or not. Future remains indistinct to everybody. Love is an asset of human life. Only fate can make one get it. Went to sleep by 11:00.

29 September (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent all the day casually reading newspaper, listening to radio and going out for eating. My thought follows, “Getting lost in the wilderness of a deep forest seems to be a great joy and adventure to me. Man is a creature of nature. Much part of his life is inevitably dependent on trees, animals and birds. This world can’t be beautiful without these phenomena. Seasonal effects get effectively reflected in dense forests. There are various sounds all around. It looks thrilling if it starts drizzling. One needs to run in search of a shady place when lively twigs and flowers mock at the fellow. The heart craves for the lap of a beautiful girl who must have mistakenly entered human world from heaven. When it is getting dark, the body begins to shrink with fear. When the moon slowly appears in the welkin, gradually shedding his light, the lonely creature in the forest considers him the best friend available. Solitude has a different meaning when discovered in nature with special interest. It’s a heavenly mood. One has to find and venture on that road”. Went to sleep by 10:30.

30 September (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent most of the day listening to radio, reading newspaper and going out for the habitual stomach filling. Recently I stopped consuming rice to withstand the deficit in my budget and to see if a regular rice consumer can do with other food items. Vegetable noodles in the afternoon and some kind of snacks in the evening constitute my food. I don’t look weak but there is the effect of lack of rice on my body to some extent. Today is the last day in my favorite month. Evening it rained by 5:00. I enjoyed it a lot. Rain is one of the best natural products I like till the end of my life. To drench oneself in heavy rain with inbuilt passion for it looks strange and fantastic. This cool rain is reaching me October from September. I am sad to leave this month. It brought me into my 28th year of life. I specially thank Lord Krishna for blessing me with this spell of rain. I always remain grateful to Mother Saraswati for Her blessings to me in keeping me in the world of enlightenment. Spirituality is an essential element of my life. Night listened to a “Hari Katha” on Hyderabad radio. Went to sleep by 11:00.

1 October (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. It seems to be a special day today in many respects. The auspicious Brahmotsavam program is going on at Tirumala. Today it is Voluntary Blood Donation Day. Today it is International Music Day and also the eve of Mahatma Gandhi’s birth anniversary. Above all, I saw an interesting question in the “Vasundhara” section of Telugu daily Eenadu today. This question seems to have been asked by Lakshmi, whom I met for the first time on 13 July, 1993, at their house in Ramayyapatnam. I admired her and dreamed to marry her. Later she got married to the boy chosen by her parents. This question to the experts at this daily presents the perspective of issue of love from a girl. She asked the psychologist if she can divorce her present husband and marry her sincere lover. The psychologist advised her to be rational and careful. If she were Lakshmi that wrote this letter to the daily and if God approves it, I am ready to invite her into my life. I understood the essence of admiration falling in love with her. So, I welcome her as long as I am available. Went to sleep by 11:00.

2 October (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning I heard on radio that Chandrababu Naidu, the present Chief Minister of Andhra Pradesh, was attacked by Naxalites (a violent revolutionary group in India) through a bomb blast when he was on his roadway to Tirupati. It seems he narrowly escaped from his death. He is a diligent and intelligent fellow. God saved him. Started to the rented portion of my friend Veeranjaneyulu by 9:30. Took one bus and one auto rickshaw and reached the spot by 11:30. We had our lunch by 12:30. Talked with my brother Sambha, sister-in-law Kranti and cousin Hari using his cellular phone. Afternoon rested on a mat for some time. On the other side, my friend was imparting the techniques of Tanjore Painting to a lady student. He does not like others staying in that hall while the teaching of painting is going on, for the sake of privacy and freedom to his students. Thereafter we went to Madhapur to do a bit of shopping. It started raining by 6:30. It rained cats and dogs. I felt very thrilled. We returned to his abode by 8:00. We had our supper by 9:00. Trinath and I spent talking till 12:30. Night I had a dream in which I saw the positive signs of my journey to Alaska. Went to sleep by 1:00.

3 October (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning bought three newspapers and reached my hostel room by 8:30 taking an auto rickshaw and a bus from Journalist Colony ‘A’. Washed a pair of clothes and put them on the terrace of our hostel to get them dry up. Scanned the dailies for some time and then rested for two hours. Left for Secunderabad by 5:00. Rushed to Hotel Padmaja opposite the railway station and had a plate of vegetable biryani for 14 rupees. This item was delicious. I enjoyed eating it. It started raining when I was entering the hotel and it stopped by the time I stepped out. Bought a dozen bananas and four oranges for my brother and entered Secunderabad railway station. Bought a ticket and took Hyderabad-Kazipet passenger train. Reached Kazipet Junction by 10:30. Visakhapatnam-Hazrat Nizamuddin Express arrived by 12:00. My brother Sambha, my sister-in-law Kranti and my cousin Anantha Lakshmi are going to Ambala Cantonment to see those places along with my brother Srinivas and sister-in-law Sandhya Rani. They visit Hindu shrines in that region. I took leave of them by 1:00 (tomorrow early morning) when their train left the station. Held the bag of homemade sweets and sat in the railway station.

4 October (Saturday)

Got into a general compartment of Machilipatnam-Secunderabad Express by 2:30 (today early morning). There was no room to sit. I felt like a fish out of water and ended up sitting in a dirty corner. The poverty of India can be witnessed in the general compartments of trains all over India. Reached Secunderabad railway station by 5:00. Felt very sleepy. Took an ordinary bus at Rethifile Bus Stand after one hour’s waiting. Got off it near Syndicate Bank by Shivam Road. Bought three newspapers and walked up to the KSS hostel. Freshened up myself and scanned the dailies. Started to the Secretariat by city bus by 7:30. There is a chance of getting two tickets, free of cost, at Prasads Multiplex by NTR Gardens, on the submission of three newspaper cuttings of an ad, issued by the promoters of the film in a newspaper, for a recently released Hindi film (Baghban) of Amitabh Bachchan. There was a long queue. I gave up the idea and gave my three collected newspaper cuttings to a patient boy standing there with his own collection. I exhibited my poverty coming here to utilize this offer. There were rich folks also in the queue. I liked them. They are my class. Let them see that film after the interesting struggle. Youth should be like that. Walked via Mint Compound to take a bus at Secretariat from where I started walking to reach this multiplex. Spent rest of my time in the hostel casually. Went to sleep by 10:00.

5 October (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Today it is Vijaya Dasami. Spent all my time casually. From 3:00 to 4:00 listened to a Telugu play titled “Bhaagya Nagaram” on Hyderabad radio. It was excellent. It presented the history of Hyderabad. The name of Lord Krishna follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare.   Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 10:00.

6 October (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Washed a pair of clothes. Had my breakfast in Hotel Shanti Deluxe and bought two newspapers. Returned to the hostel by 8:30 and scanned these two dailies. Left for Secunderabad by 11:00 by a city bus. Got off the bus at Rethifile Bus Stand and walked to Hotel Padmaja opposite the railway station. Had a plate of vegetable biryani for 14 rupees. Went to the office of our consultancy by 1:30. Met M S Raju and took a cheque for 2000 rupees for my expenses. He told me to come to the office on 20th of this month to see the copy of my work permit. Thence moved to Sai Sampada Plaza at Street No. 6 in Hubsiguda and encashed the cheque at Global Trust Bank. Returned to the hostel by 3:30. Spent two hours listening to radio and reading a newspaper. Went to Hilton Café by 6:30 and had a plate of fried vegetable rice. It was oily. I pitied my arteries. Spent writing a long letter from 7:30 to 10:00 addressing M S Raju describing my present financial condition. It came to eight pages. I maintained the beauty of narration and the order of content organization. Went to sleep by 10:30 for my dreams.

7 October (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Had my breakfast by 8:00. Bought two newspapers and returned to the hostel. Today I changed the place of my breakfast. Sat by the entrance of our hostel and scanned these dailies for half an hour. Then stepped out and walked on searching for a computer center with Telugu typing and laser printer facility. Following the advice of our hostel mates, walked along the road via Shankar Math. Reached Quarantine Junction and searched for my expected spot. I spotted Venu Graphics and went in. They told me that they charge 20 rupees for typing and printout of one page in Telugu. I remembered this fact and walked ahead along Tilak Road looking for other computer centers with this facility. I found that they charge 30 rupees for one page for the same work. Walked back to Venu Graphics and waited for the Telugu typist. He came by 11:30 and gave me the printouts of the three pages by 1:00. The manuscript of this letter is to be sent to M S Raju and laser print copy of the letter is for my records section. Enveloped the letter and posted it at the post office in the Advanced Training Institute behind our hostel. Had my supper in Sri Satya Mess by Shivam Road. Went to sleep by 11:00.

8 October (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Today it is the day of “Job Opportunities” in the English dailies The Times of India and The Hindu. Though I am currently engaged in the task of leaving for Alaska, it is interesting to see the present trend of employment in the private sector, scanning these newspapers. In today’s city edition of The Times of India, there was an ad by an England based writers’ bureau. They invited enthusiasts to send in their details if they are interested in getting their writings published. I am interested in this field and so wrote a letter to them and posted it. Returned to the hostel and spent scanning the three dailies. The Telugu daily Eenadu is the other newspaper in the trio. Today I sent my application for the position of “Processing Associate” at the GE Software in Hyderabad. They asked to send in responses by email only. I want to see what they do if I send mine by post. Also sent a postcard to the office of The Times of India in Hyderabad, asking a question on the government’s action against the fraudulent recruiting agencies in the twin cities, to be answered by Chandrababu Naidu, the present Chief Minister of Andhra Pradesh, in his weekly column. Had my supper in Shanti Deluxe Hotel by Shivam Road. Went to sleep by 10:00.

9 October (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent much of my daytime listening to songs on my Walkman, reading a newspaper and going out for food. Evening went to a nearby Internet café and spent there for two hours. I am poor at using Internet and so took one of my hostel mates to help me. Recently I saw an ad in The Hindu which promised the provision of free details on the availability of jobs in Alaska. The address of this source is datainformation@indiatimes.com. I sent an email to this address. We found much written and pictorial information on Alaska in the related website. It all cost me 30 rupees for browsing Internet. Went to Shanti Deluxe Hotel and had a plate of vegetable biryani. Returned to the hostel by 8:00. Wrote letters to some embassies in New Delhi enquiring them about the availability of jobs in their respective countries. I chose Sweden, Switzerland, New Zealand and Trinidad and Tobago for it. I wrote one letter addressing each embassy. Enveloped them and posted. I felt that a world is there out to listen to my wild cry of despair and despondency. Felt emotionally tired. Went to sleep by 10:30 searching for peace.

10 October (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Had my breakfast by 8:30 at the familiar handcart near the gate of Osmania University. Bought a copy of Eenadu. Came back to my hostel room by 9:00 and spent reading it till 10:30. Went out and got my educational certificates photocopied at a nearby store. Thence proceeded to the post office in Advanced Training Institute and posted the envelopes to the four embassies in New Delhi. Returned to my hostel room and listened to Telugu cine songs on my Walkman for some time. Then went down and sat with our hostel supervisor talking with him for some time. He has many stories with him related to real life. We spent happily talking for one hour. One of my hostel mates offered to share his parcel of lunch with me. I readily agreed for it. It was 3:00. I regretted crossing my schedule of timings. Listened to songs on my Walkman till 4:00. Then went out to check the email of my friend at an Internet café on his request. There is comprehensive information regarding jobs in Alaska. It all costs a few thousands to land in Alaska for a fish packaging job. A book carrying these details costs 1020 rupees. Went to sleep by 10:30.

11 October (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Went out and had my breakfast by 7:30. Bought a copy of Eenadu and returned to the hostel room. Read it till 9:00. Then went out and took an auto rickshaw to go down Shivam Road. Got off it and entered Amberpet Branch of State Bank of India. Bought a Demand Draft for 1020 rupees in favor of Data Creation. It seems to be a small agency in Mumbai. I am sending this draft to them for the book on Fish Packaging Jobs in Alaska. Started to Secunderabad by a city bus by 10:00. Went to the office of our consultancy and told Anuradha that if they fail to show me my work permit by the evening of 20th of this month, there is no question of my going to Alaska and that they would be required to pay me the money back and return my passport in two days’ time thereafter. Went to Hotel Padmaja and had a plate of vegetable biryani. Returned to the hostel by 2:30. Wrote a complaint letter addressing the Commissioner of Police in Hyderabad, explaining him the cheating nature of our consultancy. Rushed to a nearby computer center and got it typed up and laser printed. This letter is scheduled to be posted by me on the 20th of this month after observing the behavior of the people at the consultancy in repaying my money. Night listened to Telugu cine songs. Went to sleep by 10:30.

12 October (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent reading newspapers for two hours. By 10:00 left for Madhura Nagar at Yousufuguda by a city bus. Today the annual general body meeting of the Andhra Pradesh Kshatriya Seva Samithi is taking place there. The venue of the meeting is Sagi Rama Krishnam Raju Community Hall. I reached there by 11:30. The key people of the occasion spoke till 1:30. Thereafter lunch followed. I too had it. Returned to the hostel by 3:00. From 3:00 to 4:00 listened to a Telugu play titled “Padagetthina Devathalu” on Hyderabad radio. From 4:00 to 5:30 spent reading Eenadu. In today’s The Times of India, I saw an interesting matrimonial ad. I wanted to respond to the parents of that bride. Immediately wrote a letter. This girl stated that she is an exceptionally beautiful girl. She wants one that loves her honestly till the end of her life. There was only her/their email address. My lonely heart is also crying for the love of a beautiful girl for years. Went to a nearby computer center and emailed my message to her. In this world, an ordinary fellow like me, sending a touching email to an exceptionally beautiful girl, is not an extraordinary thing. Many of these beautiful girls do not even acknowledge the replies from their enthusiastic suitors. Night listened to Telugu cine songs on tape recorder. Went to sleep by 11:00.

13 October (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Went out and had my breakfast by 7:30. Returned to the hostel and spent reading the newspaper till 10:30. Then went to a nearby Internet café along with my hostel mate Murali and spent there for 90 minutes. Went to Shanti Deluxe Hotel and had a plate of vegetable biryani. Returned to my hostel room and spent listening to Telugu cine songs till 3:30. Then one of our hostel mates proposed me the idea of going out for seeing a film. I too felt the need. We three friends went out and waited at the bus stop near Osmania University Gate. We took a city bus for Kachiguda. We went to cinema Venkata Ramana to see “Joggers’ Park” but this film was not on show as advertised in today’s Deccan Chronicle. Then we opted for the Hindi version of “The Pirates of Caribbean” in cinema Taraka Rama. We saw this excellent film from 6:30 to 8:45. We returned to the hostel by 10:00. My friend Veeranjaneyulu called me up. He informed me that my father rang him up and asked him to tell me to withdraw from the idea of going to Alaska. My brother Srinivas called me up and said that they would start back tomorrow from Ambala Cantonment. Went to sleep by 11:00.

14 October (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Got ready soon and left for Journalist Colony ‘A’ by 9:00 by a city bus. Reached Veeru’s rented portion by 10:30. We saw a few suitable matrimonial ads in The Times of India recently and encircled them to respond later. The main problem with my friend Veeranjaneyulu is that he wants a very beautiful girl to marry. He deserves it because he is also a handsome and healthy creature. He is about 30 now. He wants to be frank in revealing his age to his prospective bride. Actually he does not look that aged. Once his real age is revealed, the response from the people of the bride might be negative. There is nothing wrong if the bridegroom is five or ten years older than the bride in special cases. A man would be capable of reproduction even at the age of 70 whereas a woman ceases to be reproductive around 50 only. He does not show special interest in getting married. A great life partner is necessary for such a gentleman. He is a good artist. He is earning well. There won’t be sweetness in life without a wife. Night we were engaged in taking some photos. One of his friends is going to marry soon. So, he wants a few artistic photographs to send to the people of the bride. Went to sleep by 12:00 for my dreams.

15 October (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. I too got photographed with the good camera of my friend Veeranjaneyulu from 5:30 to 8:30. Two were taken indoors in special light effects and the other two outside by the garden way by Jubilee Hills Road. We had rice by 9:30. Then I went to Krishna Nagar to get those film rolls developed and printed. I spent for three hours at Sai Kiran Photo Studio by main road attending this task. I got myself snapped for my passport size photos in color. I saw the photo of my friend Lahari at this studio. He put it outside for publicity purpose. I asked him to see if the negative of Lahari’s photo is available. I wanted to get a few photos of her printed. Gave the photos to my friend Veeru and returned to our hostel by 4:00. Washed a pair of clothes, took a bath and got ready soon. Left for Secunderabad by 5:00. Had my supper in a hotel there and took Hyderabad-Kazipet push-pull passenger train by 7:30. The speed of this train and the vacant seats in its coaches made me happy. Reached Kazipet Junction by 11:30. I placed myself on an iron bench on a platform.

16 October (Thursday)

Woke up by 2:30 from the iron bench on the platform. Hazrat Nizamuddin-Visakhapatnam Express arrived by 3:00. My brother Srinivas angrily rebuked me for giving two lakh rupees to an idiot at a private consultancy. My brother Srinivas, sisters-in-law Sandhya Rani and Kranti, my cousin Anantha Lakshmi, my cousin Vivekananda Varma and my nephews Sujan and Suhas left with the train by 3:30. My brother Sambha and I waited in the station for some time. We took Kazipet-Hyderabad push-pull passenger train by 5:30. We reached Secunderabad by 8:30. We had our breakfast in a hotel and went to the office of our consultancy. M S Raju, the bloody scoundrel, wasting eight months of my time and leaving us with a debt of one lakh rupees, issued us two post-dated cheques. They value 1, 85,000 rupees. My Alaska Dream Project came to an end, stamping a mark of shame on my personality and a nightmare in my life. I saw off my brother Sambha in Secunderabad railway station by 4:45 at Visakha Express in a general compartment. Returned to the KSS Hostel by 6:00. I am deeply hurt. I don’t know why God cursed me. I already wasted four years’ time in my life. I don’t foresee light in my life. There is no charm in my life. I am living a hellish life. Went to sleep by 10:00.

17 October (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Got ready soon and went out to get my old resume revised to apply for jobs. This work went on for half an hour. Took a city bus to Lakdi Ka Pool and thence another bus to the HCU main gate. Entered State Bank of India there by 11:30. I wanted to deposit the two cheques for their encashment later. They rejected to do so because they are post-dated cheques. Went to the Shopping Complex in the HCU campus and had a plate of vegetable biryani at the small canteen. Got the Provisional Certificate of my M.A. English course laminated for safety sake. Got my CV photocopied. Then came out and took an auto rickshaw to Serilingampally. Thence took a city bus for Ameerpet. Went to Bakul Apartments near Dharam Karan Road to meet Bala Krishnam Raju. I waited for him in his office for one hour. He turned up by 4:15 and talked with me for one hour. He advised me to meet Rajendra Varma at Maa television network in Khairatabad and give him my CV. Went to Sai Kiran Photo Studio in Krishna Nagar and collected my passport size photos. Returned to our hostel by 8:30. Wrote a covering letter for my Maa TV venture. Went to sleep by 11:30.

18 October (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Went out and had my breakfast by 8:00. Bought a copy of Eenadu and spent reading it for one hour in my hostel room. Went out and got the scripts of two of my previous creative writings photocopied for submitting them along with my application in the office of Maa television channel. Left for Lakdi Ka Pool by 10:00 by a city bus. Alighted from it at a bus stop and walked to the office of Maa Television Network Limited at Saifabad by Lakdi Ka Pool. I had to give my application for a job to Director Rajendra Varma according to the instructions of Bala Krishnam Raju. I waited for him from 11:00 to 3:00 sitting in this office. He did not turn up. I glanced up at two or three female anchors passing by me. They looked very attractive and fanciful. I left this office asking a staff member there to reach my application to the concerning director. Thence went to the office of Intervaltravel, a UK based BPO in Somajiguda. They briefly interviewed me. Returned to the hostel by 4:30. Rested for some time to heal my weary body and wounded psyche. Went out and bought a Telugu edition of India Today. Filled in the contest form attached to it and kept the envelope ready to be posted. Night wrote a letter and spent talking with my hostel mates for some time. Went to sleep by 10:30.

19 October (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Took a bus for Yousufguda by 9:00. Reached the abode of my friend Veeru by 10:00. The name of Lord Krishna follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 12:00.

20 October (Monday)

Woke up by 5:00. Took a city bus at Yousufguda Check Post bus stop and reached the hostel by 8:30. Got ready soon and took a city bus to Secunderabad. Went to the office of M S Raju by 11:00 and collected my passport from receptionist Anuradha. Took a city bus at Rethifile Bus Stand for Dilsukh Nagar. Got off it there and headed toward Chaitanyapuri in an auto rickshaw. Thence took an auto rickshaw for New Maruti Nagar. Moved to “Krishna Placement Services” and knew the details about the fish packaging job in Alaska. It costs 50,000 rupees and all the processing does not exceed two months’ time. It is a six-month work permit based agreement with an earning possibility of one lakh rupees per month. He told me to deposit the required amount of money in a joint bank account to be withdrawn by him after I find the original work permit and stamped visa in my hand. To allow him to start the process, I paid him 200 rupees and submitted the photocopies of my passport and educational certificates. My hope was invested. I can’t foresee cooperation from my family members. Came to the hostel and put my luggage in my room. Took a city bus and moved to Jubilee Hills. It rained heavily between 4:00 and 4:30. The roads were flooded. Night went to a marriage consultancy along with my friend Veeranjaneyulu. Went to sleep by 10:00.

21 October (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Took leave of my friend Veeranjaneyulu and took an auto rickshaw for Krishna Nagar. Thence took a city bus for Shivam Road. Reached the hostel by 9:30. My life became a nightmare with the threat of failure of my journey to Alaska. My father is from a poor background. He can’t forgive me that easily. There are very few options before me now to make my life somewhat meaningful. I am in my 28th year now. My dreams and wishes to get a beautiful wife are fading away. The apparent features of ugliness on my face are my flat nose and scar on the chin. They must be corrected by plastic surgery. This venture is beyond my financial capability. I want to die. I pray all the gods to bless me with a peaceful death while asleep. Once the money is reached to my father after the encashment of the two post-dated cheques, I am going to be a useless burden on this earth. God is unkind to me and so making me live this hell. The highly delayed joys of youth are a good enough reason for a person to die voluntarily. These chosen deaths reduce the burden of population in this heavy world. Went to sleep by 10:00 praying God to kill me soon.

22 October (Wednesday)

Woke up by 6:00. It was cool and drizzly outside sending cold and mild winds into my hostel room. These showers of rain are the blessings of supreme God. I enjoyed them a lot. Morning I was supposed to wash a pair of clothes. The humidity of weather discouraged me from doing it. Scanned The Hindu and The Times of India from 7:30 to 8:30. I saw some suitable job vacancies for me in them. Enveloped my CV to send to a consultancy in Hyderabad for a small job with the HSBC Bank in Hyderabad. During the interval of the drizzle, ventured out to the post office in the Advanced Training Institute. Stamped and posted two envelopes. One was a response for the position of Sub Editor at ICFAI University Press in Hyderabad and the other carries my filled in contest form of Telugu edition of India Today. Afternoon shared a parcel of lunch with two of my hostel mates. I spent seven rupees for my share. Evening wrote a letter to my teacher uncle Venkata Rama Raju in Jaggampeta explaining him the recent developments around me. By 9:00 went out and had two plates of cutlets (made with beans) at a pushcart for eight rupees for my supper. Night listened to songs and radio on my Walkman. Went to sleep by 10:00 for my dreams.

23 October (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent all the day casually within the hostel. The name of Lord Krishna follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 10:00.

24 October (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Went out and had my breakfast by 8:30. Scanned The Hindu and The Times of India for some time. Took a city bus by 10:30 for Banjara Hills. Two days ago, I saw an ad in Deccan Chronicle, which says that one can earn over one lakh rupees a month. I wanted to know what it all means and so this journey. Got down from the bus at Krishna Nagar in Yousufguda and took an auto rickshaw toward the Apollo Hospital. Thence took an auto rickshaw and alighted from it by the Water Tank area in Banjara Hills near Road No. 7. Walked a little ahead and spotted “Uma Aiswarya House”. Went into this building opposite Kazaria Club and found the office of “Living Products Limited”. Its General Manager explained us the characteristics of their products and the marketing strategy required to be taken up by us to earn the promised money by them. The main ingredients of these products are aloe vera and honey. I understood that my character and temperament do not fit into this business and so rushed out of their office with the disappointment of losing the chance of earning one lakh rupees a month. Thence went to the rented portion of my friend Veeranjaneyulu in Journalist Colony ‘A’. Called up my brother Srinivas using the cellular phone of Veeru and enquired about their well-being. Had my lunch and supper there and returned to the hostel by 8:30. Listened to radio for some time. Went to sleep by 9:30.

25 October (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning scanned dailies for some time. Got ready and left for Narayana Guda by 9:30. Reached the Pinki House opposite Surya Bar and Restaurant by 10:00. Here an interview is going to take place for the position of “Call Center Executive” to be posted in Bangalore. As part of the selection process, first a personal interaction took place, then a group discussion and then the final HR interview with the representative of the recruiting office from Bangalore. I spent here from 10:00 to 4:30. They told us that they would inform us soon about our final interviews in Bangalore. Nearly 40 candidates attended this interview. I learnt a bit about participation in an interview through this. Went back to the hostel and put my light academic luggage in my room. Took a city bus to Yousufguda Check Post by 5:00. Thence took an auto rickshaw and reached the rented portion of my friend Veeranjaneyulu by 6:45. Today it is Deepavali for Hindus. I did not wear a new pair of clothes. I did nothing to celebrate this festival. The roads and the trees in the twin cities are illuminated with special lights to celebrate the spirit of the ongoing Afro-Asian Games in Hyderabad. The rich people in Jubilee Hills celebrated this festival bursting firecrackers. I achieved nothing in my life to celebrate it. Went to sleep by 10:30. 

26 October (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent all the day within the abode of Veeru at Jubilee Hills. Night all of us friends went to cinema Galaxy at Toli Chowki and saw the Telugu film “Tagore” of Chiranjeevi. It was very good. The name of Lord Krishna follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 1:00.

27 October (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Got ready soon and left for Yousufguda Check Post by 7:00. Thence took a city bus for Shivam Road by 7:30. Reached the hostel by 9:00. Washed a pair of clothes and took a bath by 9:30. Took a city bus for Lakdi Ka Pool by 10:00. Thence took a city bus up to the HCU main gate. Went into State Bank of India there and deposited the cheque of 95,000 rupees for encashment. It is one of the two cheques M S Raju issued me recently. The other cheque has to be deposited on or after the 6th of the next month. He issued post-dated cheques. Withdrew 500 rupees from my savings account for my daily expenses (from my present balance of 1500 rupees). Took an auto rickshaw to Gachibowli, from there to Kothaguda, from there to Jubilee Hills Check Post and from there reached Veeru’s rented portion in Journalist Colony ‘A’ by 12:45. Stayed there rest of the time. Spent talking with my friends. Trinath told me about immorality in the film industry. I hated actors and actresses. They are deities on screen and pimps and prostitutes behind it. Went to sleep by 11:30.

28 October (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Had my breakfast by 8:00. A friend of Veeranjaneyulu prepared it. Scanned today’s dailies for some time. Yoganand came by 8:00. We spent talking for some time. Afternoon I snapped Veeranjaneyulu for one hour. He has a good camera with him. He has very few photos of his own. Today I took many photos of him to send to brides responding to their matrimonial ads in newspapers. Evening went out to get them developed and printed at Sai Kiran Photo Studio in Krishna Nagar. He said that it takes two hours. Meanwhile I went to a nearby computer center and attended the work of getting the personal details of Veeranjaneyulu typed up and printed out to send it along with his photo to brides. I could complete this work by 8:00. Went back to the photo studio and found that the photos came very well. Returned to Veeru’s abode by 10:30. My friend was satisfied with many of his photos. I was the photographer. So, I felt happy to know that I could do a useful thing in this world. Had my supper by 11:00. Spent talking with my friends for some time. Went to sleep by 12:30. 

29 October (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned the recent matrimonial ads in The Times of India and identified six suitable brides for Veeranjaneyulu. Got six envelopes ready to post. Then scanned today’s copy of The Times of India to see if there are any suitable job vacancies for me. There is only one suitable job vacancy for me at “Nipuna Services Limited” of the Satyam Company in Hyderabad. It stopped drizzling. Trinath and I stepped out by 9:30. He told me recently that he wants to introduce me to Krishna Keshav, a film director. We reached his office in Musheerabad by 11:00. We spent talking with him till 2:00. He already produced many good films. Presently he is planning to produce a film on the realities of modern life. He told us to come with a good story. I posted the six envelopes at the post office in Gandhi Nagar. Returned to the hostel by 4:00. Spent at an Internet café till 5:00. Had a plate of vegetable biryani in Shanti Deluxe Hotel by 7:00. Had my haircut by 8:00. Night listened to Telugu cine songs on my Walkman. It has been raining well these days. Went to sleep by 10:00.

30 October (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Washed a pair of clothes, scanned today’s dailies and had my breakfast by 8:00. Took a copy of my CV and left for Himayat Nagar by 9:00 by a city bus. Got off it at the crossroads there and started searching for the place where I had to take a written test for a job. After much effort, I could spot that place. It is in the first floor of Tirumala Estates by Food World outlet with its number identity of 3-6-262. It is Cadsys India (P) Limited conducting a written test for its requirement of Desk Computer Staff. They collected our CVs and issued registration slips to allow us into a room for the written test. There was heavy flow of candidates. So, they delayed conducting written test. There were nearly 200 candidates. I did the written test from 10:30 to 10:45. It is a good test. Tomorrow we have to check the results on their website. Returned to the hostel by 1:00. Went to Triveni Hostel in Osmania University by 2:30. My friends of the Telugu Department from the University of Hyderabad are presently doing their M.Phil. courses here staying in this hostel of the Telugu University. I sought their help to fill in the correct answers to the questions in the weekly contest of the Telugu edition of India Today. Returned to our hostel and then went to the post office in the Advanced Training Institute to post the envelope containing the filled in contest form of India Today. Had a plate of vegetable biryani in Shanti Deluxe Hotel by 6:30. Night listened to Hyderabad radio. Went to sleep by 9:00.

31 October (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning scanned dailies. Spent casually till 4:00. Recently I met Krishna Rao Keshav, a film director, in Musheerabad. He directed good films portraying the greatness of Indian culture and values. Trinath and I met him. He told us to prepare a good story for a film. Today I wrote two stories in Telugu for this purpose. The title of one of these stories is “Swapna Saagaram” with an attractive love episode between Swapna and Sagar in the setting of a dense forest area. The heroine is innocent and very beautiful. The hero is an admirer of beauty. Wrote the second story from 9:30 to 10:30. It is the story of an orphan who becomes a millionaire in the middle of his poor life winning a big lottery. Then many people approach him and make him a great fellow. Even then he can’t live happily. The title of this story is “Hitech Man”. Technology should not make a man obese and mechanical. Money centric human relationships can’t build the bonds of affection which are necessary for the happiness of modern man. The present society must understand this fact. This story highlights the irrationality and fashion of the modern people. Went to sleep by 11:00.

1 November (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Today it is the Formation Day of Andhra Pradesh. I am happy to know that we (the Telugu speaking people) got a separate state for ourselves to develop our rich literature and uphold our self-respect. Today it is the closing day of the first Afro-Asian Games which were conducted for eight days in Hyderabad. Balayogi Stadium is in the University of Hyderabad area only. I am not interested in games and sports. One can play at home for physical fitness and pleasure. The governments of many nations are spending millions of dollars for these useless games. The players are earning well and becoming stars in a little period of time. The mad viewers are wasting their time and money watching these silly people and their monkey acts. Nations can’t tackle their mounting poverty as long as their inadequate funds are spent for this field and their productive people are mad after these pursuits. I did not go to watch any of these events in the city though they are in my reach. Afternoon posted the envelope to Krishna Rao Keshav. Evening went to a fast food pushcart opposite Srirang Hospital and had a plate of chicken rice for 15 rupees. I know that this is not good for my health. Good food costs not less than 20 rupees. I can’t afford it in my present financial condition. Night listened to Hyderabad radio for some time. Went to sleep by 10:30.

2 November (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. From 7:30 to 9:00 prepared eight responses to the matrimonial ads given in The Times of India to send to brides on behalf of Veeranjaneyulu. I am also helping him in finding a bride for him. Spent reading today’s newspapers for some time. Evening went to the abode of Veeru at Jubilee Hills. Night spent there. The name of Lord Krishna follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 11:00.

3 November (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent much of my daytime within the rented portion of Veeranjaneyulu in Journalist Colony ‘A’. Evening went to Sai Kiran Photo Studio in Krishna Nagar to collect the negatives of the photos printed earlier. These photos are of my friend Veeranjaneyulu and are meant to be sent to brides in response to their ads in The Times of India. When I was in this photo studio, a showy girl came for getting her passport size photos printed immediately. She must be a TV artiste. She wore a tight dress in such a way that her body above the waist and below the navel is clearly visible for public view. When men watch these free shows during daytime, how can they find their night life delightful in the company of their familiar creatures? The hidden is a tantalizing secret and the exposed is a public toilet. I felt somewhat uneasy to witness her presence. She was enticing crazy guys on roads. I should appreciate her modernity and fasion. It is a kind of social service. I observed another girl in a small cloth store opposite the photo studio. She looked beautiful in a Punjabi dress. I found her to be a perfect bride for me. Why are the present boys running after dishonest and exhibitionist girls? A girl that expects much appreciation from others in the society through her exhibitionism can rarely love her real fellow at home. It is good even if the guy is a frequent visitor to brothels. They look made for each other. May God bless me with a cool job and a good wife. Went to sleep by 12:00.

4 November (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Got ready and stepped out by 6:45. Took an auto rickshaw and reached Yousufguda Check Post by 7:00. Took Uppal bound Metro Express bus by 7:30 and reached our hostel by 8:30. It is pleasure to travel by bus in the early hours of any day being greeted by breezes. The driver drove the bus fast. I get creative ideas in such climate. Went down Shivam Road and bought a copy of Deccan Chronicle. There were a few suitable job vacancies for me in its career section. I applied for a teaching position in Mahatma Gandhi Institute of Technology. Then took up the case of the weekly contest in the Telugu edition of India Today. I knew answers to four questions in it. To know the right answer for the left out question, I went to meet my friends in Triveni Hostel. We could find the right answer. Posted a postcard to my brother Sambha giving him instructions on how to meet me in Secunderabad railway station when he comes here next Sunday to take the returned money of my Alaska Debacle. Evening had two plates of cutlets for eight rupees at the handcart opposite Srirang Hospital for my supper. Night washed a pair of clothes. Listened to Hyderabad radio from 8:30 to 11:00. Went to sleep by 11:30.

5 November (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning scanned The Hindu and The Times of India. Started to Lakdi Ka Pool by 9:00 by a city bus. Had three samosas in a hotel and then walked to the nearby Pearl Regency Hotel. There is a Walk-in Interview of the “V-Customer” today. It is a Delhi based consultancy selecting candidates for its US based BPOs in India. Nearly 200 candidates attended this interview. The position on offer was “Cusomer Support Engineer” in New Delhi. In the first round, they asked us to read out a few English words and a passage to test our accent. Many were filtered at this stage. I could attend the Group Discussion round. We were about seven candidates. They asked us to talk on our interesting topic for two minutes. I talked about the trends of the present film industry. Only three were selected from us for the next round. I wondered at how he could decide our unsuitability to that position within minutes. It is a useless method for choosing right candidates. Rest of us dispersed ourselves in our respective directions. I had my lunch for 15 rupees in a nearby hotel. Spent two hours in an Internet café. Called up Krishna Rao Keshav, the film director. Took a city bus and returned to the hostel by 5:00. Night listened to Hyderabad radio and Telugu cine songs on my Walkman. Went to sleep by 11:00.

6 November (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning scanned the two dailies. Took a city bus by 8:30 and bought a daily bus pass. This allows the bearer of the pass to travel in the ordinary city buses, both in the urban and suburban routes, till the end of the day. First I went to Tarnaka and thence to Secunderabad. From there to Serilingampally and thence to the State Bank of India near the HCU main gate. Deposited the cheque of 90,000 rupees, one of the two M S Raju issued me previously, settling my Alaska Issue. Withdrew 500 rupees from my savings account for my daily expenses leaving a balance of 500 rupees in it. Thence proceeded to Mehdipatnam and from there to the VST and thence to Musheerabad. Met Krishna Rao Keshav, the film director, in his office. He told me to create exciting twists in the two stories I submitted him recently. I wondered to know that the present producers and viewers can’t accept life portrayed in its true form on silver screen. I am a fellow of truism and altruism. I can hardly deal with this artificial and deceptive society and its burning interest for twists. I pitied my present creative position. From 2:00 to 4:30 saw the Telugu film “Kurraadochchaadu” in cinema Sandhya at RTC Crossroads. It was produced by T Rajender, a noted figure in Tamil film industry, introducing his son Simbu as a hero beside a beautiful heroine. Returned to the hostel by 5:00. Knew that Bala Krishnam Raju called up to our hostel phone in my absence and told one to inform me to ring him up. Night listened to Hyderabad radio and Telugu cine songs on my Walkman. Went to sleep by 10:30.

7 November (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned a newspaper and washed a pair of clothes. Started to the office of Kshatriya Seva Samithi at New Nallakunta by 8:30. Walked through the lanes for 15 minutes and reached it. Collected the cellular phone number of Bala Krishnam Raju and called him up. He told me to meet him in this office on next Tuesday. Returned to the hostel by 9:00 walking through the short cut. Veeranjaneyulu called me up and told me to come to him. Took a city bus and reached his rented portion by 12:30. Evening we went to an Internet café in Film Nagar and checked the email attachment sent by Bhayya to his Yahoo Mail address. He sent the details of some brides put on shaadi.com website. We checked 400 profiles of brides. He liked only four girls out of them. I wondered at his taste for female beauty. I liked many of those girls and pitied them. Brides and bridegrooms are on show and enthusiastic and competent creatures can do their best participating in this hard online contest. The world has changed a lot. One does not prefer marrying a good boy in the opposite house but chats online with an unknown person far away in another continent. We returned to his rented portion by 12:00. Went to sleep by 12:30.

8 November (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning washed my body and then scanned today’s dailies. Spent casually till 12:30. Had my lunch by 1:00 and then left for Film Nagar along with a friend to browse Internet on behalf of my friend Veeranjaneyulu. We sat at a computer and scanned the profiles of brides posted on shaadi.com website. We scanned 1600 photos. I noted down the brief details of 100 brides in a notebook. I specially marked 20 cases out of them. They are considerably significant in terms of their beauty and other qualities. We returned to Veeru’s abode by 6:30. We had our supper by 8:00. Then Veeranjaneyulu and I went to Krishna Nagar to scan his photo and upload it into his bridegroom profile on shaadi.com website. This afternoon I created his bridegroom profile on this website. Night we uploaded his photo as well into his profile. We edited the details in his profile wherever necessary. I used some rich words to describe his personality. He told me to change them to simple words. Marriage has become a serious issue for youth these days. Choosing a good life partner is definitely a big problem. Desiring to get a sensitive and beautiful wife is not strange but realizing it is a challenge. We returned to his abode by 11:30. I kept thinking to create a good story for a film to sell for money. Went to sleep by 12:30.

9 November (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Freshened up myself soon and went to Kothi by a city bus. Thence moved to Mahatma Gandhi Bus Stand. My brother Sambha came from Peda Gummuluru. I went there to receive him. By 9:00 we reached the KSS Hostel in an auto rickshaw. We spent there for half an hour. By 10:30 we reached the abode of Veeru by bus. We spent there casually in the morning and afternoon. Evening we went to Shilparamam (a manmade crafts village) in Madhapur. Evening Gemini television channel shot a program there. Telugu film actor Nagarjuna talked with TV anchors about his latest Telugu film “Shivamani”. He is very handsome. We spent there from 6:00 to 7:30 watching this program sitting among general audience. We enjoyed this evening a lot. We returned to the abode of Veeru by 8:30. On the way back, we came across V V Vinayak, a talented and young Telugu film director, by the road in Journalist Colony ‘A’. I talked with him for one minute. I appreciated his direction of the Telugu film “Tagore” of Chiranjeevi. He looked handsome with his beard. He looked like a good fellow. The name of Lord Krishna follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 10:00 for my dreams.

10 November (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. My brother Sambha and I got ready soon and left for Dargah in an auto rickshaw from Jubilee Hills Public School area taking leave of my friend Veeranjaneyulu. Thence we took a city bus up to the HCU main gate. We went to the State Bank of India by 10:00. We kept waiting for the staff to come and the entrance door to be opened. We entered the bank by 10:30. We knew that the post-dated cheque of 90,000 rupees, issued by M S Raju, bounced. I was taken aback by this development. I withdrew 94,000 rupees and gave it to my brother Sambha to be taken back to home for the partial clearance of the growing loan burden there. I asked my friend Bhayya to see off my brother at Hyderabad railway station this evening by Godavari Express. He readily agreed to help me. I felt grateful to him. I saw a lawyer notice in a Telugu daily. It was issued by one of our Kshatriya folks. I rushed to Khairatabad to meet him. I waited for him in his office from 11:00 to 5:00. He assured me that he would help me out by all means. Took a city bus by Telephone Bhawan and returned to the hostel by 8:00. A heavily disturbed day thus ended by 9:30 when I placed myself on my mat to sleep.

11 November (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned today’s dailies. Got ready and left for Khairatabad by 9:00. Got off the city bus below the bridge near Khairatabad railway station. In my hurry to reach the office of Cyberabad Legal Services, to meet advocate C S N Raju, I was misguided by somebody toward Raj Bhawan Road. Being tired of the excessive walk, hired an auto rickshaw and reached the advocate’s office by 10:30. He came to his office by 12:00. I gave him a few more evidences to enable him to send a legal notice to M S Raju, a criminal. Attended the scheduled written test and the subsequent interview from 2:00 to 5:30 at Plot No. 22 of ICFAI University at Nagarjuna Hills by Panjagutta for the position of Sub Editor. About 20 candidates attended it. The written test aimed at assessing our English language skills and editing abilities. This written test went on for half an hour and the following interview for two minutes. This test was conducted in the Ramanujan Hall. I liked the ambience of the room and the treatment of test conductors toward us. Took a city bus at Panjagutta by 6:00 and proceeded to the abode of Veeranjaneyulu. We had our supper by 8:30. Called up my folks at home using the cellular phone of Veeru and explained them my follow-up regarding the bounced cheque. We spent in an Internet café in Film Nagar from 9:30 to 11:00 checking the profiles of some brides on shaadi.com website. Went to sleep by 12:00.

12 November (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Had my breakfast by 8:30 prepared by Veeranjaneyulu. Stepped out by 9:00 and proceeded to Ameerpet. Walked from the HUDA Maitri Vanam toward Dharam Karan Road. Reached Bakul Apartments by 10:30. Bala Krishnam Raju told me to meet him this morning in his office. He wants to assign me an editorial work related to the forthcoming quarterly of Kshatriya Seva Samithi (an organization working for the welfare of the Kshatriyas in the state of Andhra Pradesh, being funded and run by our community members, who are small in numbers). He informed me over phone that he would be late to his office. Took an Uppal bound 113 Y Metro Express bus and reached Shivam Road by 12:30. Typed out a covering letter to send along with my application for the position of “Marketing Trainee” at Sharp Company on a computer in an Internet café on the way. Posted that envelope to its New Delhi address and the other envelope containing the filled in contest form of the fifth weekly contest of the Telugu edition of India Today to its Hyderabad address at the post office in Advanced Training Institute. Thence walked down Shivam Road to the BATA showroom and bought a pair of thongs for my indoor use. It cost me 52 rupees. Evening had a plate of vegetable noodles for 11 rupees at the fast food handcart opposite Srirang Hospital. My present financial condition warns me to be judicious in my eating pursuits. Night washed a pair of clothes and the pending handkerchiefs. Listened to songs for some time and spent talking with my hostel mate Alluri Murali Krishnam Raju for some time. Went to sleep by 11:00.

13 November (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Washed a pair of clothes. Scanned The Hindu, The Times of India and Eenadu for some time. Left for my breakfast at the handcart near Osmania University gate by 8:00. Then took a city bus to Yousufguda Check Post. Thence took an auto rickshaw going toward Apollo Hospital. Reached Veeru’s abode by 10:00. Shanmukh, an associate presently staying with Shakunth (another name given to Veeru by our common friend Bhayya), intends to apply for a Junior Research Fellowship in Visual Arts. He asked me to write descriptions for his etchings to send to the Department of Culture, Government of India, for the award of a scholarship. He first wrote his original ideas in Telugu. Then I translated it into English, adding a little creativity. By 12:00 we went to a computer center in Krishna Nagar and got our manuscript typed up and printed on a laser printer. We returned to Veeru’s abode by 2:30. He was engaged in his instruction class of Tanjore painting to his learners. I had my lunch and rested for 90 minutes. We friends spent talking among ourselves till 6:30. Night some more friends joined our group. Went to sleep by 10:30.

14 November (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Washed the cooking dishes of last night for half an hour. Took an auto rickshaw and reached Yousufguda Check Post by 7:00. Took a city bus by 7:40 and reached our hostel by 8:45. Freshened up myself and had the homemade sweets brought by my brother Sambha recently. Morning avoided my outside dose of breakfast to save myself from the further decline of my personal budget. Now I need 1700 rupees per month for my paid stay in this hostel and nominal eating outside. Against this, my reserves dropped to negative. I am attending every possible written test and interview. Nasty recruiters are playing with me with their irrational methods of selection process. My life is getting dark day by day due to my financial breakdown. My dream of getting a beautiful wife is sliding away from me kicking me into a ditch of frustration and self-pity. I question myself why I should not desert this world when my youth is turning into a desert. On the other hand, my familiar ones can’t understand me if I take such extreme step. Personally I am a fellow of optimism and fortitude. A person like me resorting to such wrong step of life does not look justifiable in any sense. Spent all my time within the hostel only. Went to sleep by 10:30.

15 November (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent most of my time within the hostel, reading a newspaper and listening to radio. Last night I had two dreams. I am connected with two persons in admiration. Both of them left me going on their own ways. Still the subconscious part of my brain can’t leave them that fast. A solitary soul can’t live without some metaphysical attachment. Lakshmi entered my heart when I was new to the field of human admiration. I took her as my dream and worshipped her form. I spent my time with her thoughts and memories. I desired to marry her. She kicked me into a grave of gloom. Another Lakshmi of Vijayawada entered my heart in the campus of University of Hyderabad. I chased her in my position of her devoted admirer for one year. One year disappeared like one hour in her friendship. I felt very possessive about her. It led me to separation from her. These two creatures entered my dreamland last night. I felt blissful to witness their presence in my dreams. It can’t be expressed in words because one can’t write it down while dreaming. Went to sleep by 9:30.

16 November (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning scanned today’s newspapers. Left for Jubilee Hills by bus by 10:00. Reached the abode of Veeru by 11:00. Spent day and night there talking with our friends, watching parts of some films on computer and scanning beautiful paintings in the books of Veeru. The name of Lord Krishna follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 12:00.

17 November (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning scanned The Times of India. From 8:00 to 11:00 spent playing with the recently purchased computer of my friend Veeranjaneyulu. The icons on the desktop disappeared. I could not bring them back. This ate my time and spoilt my mood. Postponed all my today’s engagements to tomorrow due to it. We had our lunch by 1:30. Veeranjaneyulu, Trinath and I went to Nizam’s Institute of Medical Sciences (NIMS) at Panjagutta by 3:00. A poor patient needed B+ blood after his surgery. Veeranjaneyulu came forward to donate his blood. So, we too went along with him. He is scared of syringes and the related material. He said that the surrounding doctors laughed at him when he closed his eyes when the device was getting placed on his hand. It is believed that a shy bride also closes her eyes during her first bodily interaction with her husband in their “first night ceremony” (this ceremony is specially organized by the elders of a family, after the day of marriage, if it took place in a traditional style, based on orthodox Hinduism). I heard that lady doctors specially laughed observing the fear of my friend. My satirical comparison suits this context. Thence we proceeded to the University of Hyderabad to meet Mr. Sharma. He is a Reader in Anthropology there. His new house is presently under construction in Gulmohar Park area. He wants some paintings by Veeru to decorate his house. He took Veeru and me in his car from the HCU campus to his house under construction and explained him what sort of paintings he wants. Went to sleep by 12:00.

18 November (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Had my breakfast by 8:30. It was prepared by Shanmukh and sponsored by Veeranjaneyulu. Played with Veeru’s computer for 90 minutes and damaged its audio facility. I was experimenting. It went the wrong way. Decided to reach Mehdipatnam-Serilingampally road on foot from Jubilee Hills. Started by 9:30. I had to withdraw my money from the State Bank of India by the HCU main gate and so this journey to avoid the financial burden of spending for the auto rickshaws and city buses. I walked thoroughly along the roads in Jubilee Hills for half an hour and finally reached my familiar Journalist Colony Junction where I generally take an auto rickshaw or bus. I wondered at the magic of roads in Jubilee Hills. I pitied my tedious walk and the subsequent failure to reach the road on the other side. However, I could see big houses and the beauty of Jubilee Hills area. I dream to own a house in that locality. Took an auto rickshaw to Yousufguda Check Post and thence a city bus to Shivam Road. Reached our hostel by 10:30. I postponed my bank work to tomorrow. Washed a pair of clothes, took a bath and spent rest of the day listening to radio and songs on my Walkman. I did not go out during the day or night. I walked adequately in Jubilee Hills this morning. I am dragging a life of vacuum and frustration. Staying indoors suits me in this condition. Went to sleep by 10:30.

19 November (Wednesday)

Woke up by 6:00. My personal budget became very weak. Morning scanned The Hindu and The Times of India. They are the sources of the latest job opportunities for me. Had my breakfast by 8:30 and took a city bus to Secunderabad. From the Rethifile Bus Stand walked to the bus stop from where vehicles start toward Serilingampally. Took a city bus to Serilingampally. I had only the required money on me to go up to the State Bank of India by HCU campus. Thence took an auto rickshaw up to the bank. I felt relieved seeing the bank before me. Withdrew 600 rupees from my savings account. This money is very crucial for me now. I have been leading a pathetic life for the last one month. I don’t know why God is hesitating to kill me immediately. I am an unwanted burden on this earth. Thence walked to the post office in the HCU campus to post the envelopes (of matrimonial responses) of my friend Veeranjaneyulu. Thence walked to Men’s Hostel ‘F’ and met my friend Bhayya. He sponsored my lunch in this hostel. Thence I proceeded to Bakul Apartments by Dharam Karan Road in Ameerpet to meet Bala Krishnam Raju. He did not turn up despite my two-hour wait for him. Returned to the hostel by 6:30. Had a few homemade sweets and ten rupees of grapes for my supper. Night listened to radio for some time. Went to sleep by 10:30.

20 November (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent most of the day within the hostel. Evening called up advocate C S N Raju to know about the follow-up regarding the bounced cheque. He said that he would inform me as soon as he gets a reply from that rogue. Night went to the office of Kshatriya Seva Samithi at New Nallakunta on the call of Bala Krishnam Raju, the present secretary of this organization. He introduced me to the staff there and told them to make use of my writing skills in correspondence related matters. He dropped me at the Osmania University gate in his car on his way to attend a work in this campus. My thought follows, “Materialistic values and approaches don’t yield real happiness in one’s life. Promiscuity, pomposity and self-centeredness are the guiding principles and interesting pursuits of modern society. The affluent desire to show off themselves through frequent celebrations, fancy vehicles, strange possessions and close movements with the attractive men and women of the contemporary influential society. Love is a silly game for them. They hate the scrap of human values. They think that money, earned through any means, is the essence of human life. They have many well-wishers who praise them before them and plot against them in their backyard. They live in the jungles of manmade gadgets and facilities. They look admirable with much vice inside. Contrary to this, men and women of virtue live long even after their departure from this world”. Went to sleep by 10:00.

21 November (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning scanned The Hindu, The Times of India and Eenadu. Got ready by 8:00 and stepped out by 8:30 to have my breakfast. Took a city bus by 8:45 and reached Lower Tank Bund Road by 9:15. Entered the Convention Center in Viceroy Hotel by 9:30. This morning there is a Walk-in Interview by GE for entry level positions. They collected our resumes and assigned registration numbers to be called in to the first round of interview. The executive staff of this selection process included four girls and two boys. I was one of the 12 candidates called in for the first round of interview. They told us to talk about ourselves in which our personal life, hobbies and a one-minute talk on any role model must be included. We did it one by one. They went out and came back after two minutes. They read out the names of four candidates and informed others to leave. These positions on offer require the candidates to answer the questions of the Americans over telephone during night shifts. Walked back to the Tank Bund and took a city bus to Shivam Road. Spent rest of the day casually within the hostel. Night washed a pair of clothes. Had eight ‘Potato Bajjis’ for six rupees at a handcart down Shivam Road for my supper. Night listened to Telugu cine songs on my Walkman. Went to sleep by 11:00.

22 November (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Scanned today’s dailies till 8:00. Had my breakfast by 8:30. Left for Lakdi Ka Pool by a city bus. Got off it by the office of Police Headquarters at Saifabad and reached the nearby hotel ‘Comfort Inn Woodbridge’ by 9:30. I thought I was earlier than required but there was already a queue with not fewer than 50 candidates. Today there is an interview for three positions in the ICICI Bank. My endeavor was for the position of “Phone Banking Officer”. I did the written test from 10:30 to 11:30. It carried objective type questions on English language and arithmetic. There were 60 questions to be answered in 60 minutes. I did it satisfactorily, partly depending on the luck factor as well. They told us to come back by 1:30 and check the results. We had two hours’ time at our disposal. I went to the nearby Ayodhya Hotel and had a plate of Andhra Meal for 15 rupees. Returned to the venue of the test and observed long queues of men and women. There may be nearly 400 candidates. I wondered looking at those job seekers. By 1:30 they announced that they could not do with the results and that they would inform us later. Returned to the hostel by 2:30. Rested for one hour. Evening had some snacks at a pushcart. Listened to Hyderabad radio from 6:00 to 10:00. Went to sleep by 10:30.

23 November (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. By 10:00 reached Bhasyam School at Vivekananda Nagar in Kukatpally by bus. This morning there is a written test for the position of English Teacher with them. I did it from 10:30 to 11:30. By 1:00 reached Vasavi Soft Technologies Limited at Panjagutta. There is a test for the position of Medical Transciptionist with them. I did it well for half an hour. Returned to the hostel by 2:45. Spent in a computer center from 3:00 to 5:00. Night spent talking with my hostel mates. The name of Lord Krishna follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare.   Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 11:00.

24 November (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning scanned The Hindu and The Times of India. Got ready and left for the abode of my friend Veeranjaneyulu by 9:00. Reached there by 10:30. Spent there for some time and then left for Road No. 10 in Banjara Hills. Spotted IVRCL Towers opposite Karvy House and stepped into the office of the “Next”. It is a famous consultancy in Hyderabad functioning as a mediator between job seekers and employers. Did a written test for the position of “Call Center Executive” at “Dell” in Hitech City of Hyderabad. I did well in the written test. It comprised Grammar and Comprehension sections. From the 20 candidates that attended this written test, seven were called for a personal interview. She said that she would call me back in the evening if I was selected. She did not call me. Spent in Krishna Nagar from 6:30 to 8:30 attending a work of Veeranjaneyulu. Had my supper by 9:30. Watched the English feature film “Jungle” on his computer from 10:30 to 2:30. It is a film of one-hour duration presenting the carefree sexual behavior of two pairs in a jungle. One of the two girls is very beautiful and structured. Went to sleep by 3:00.

25 November (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Freshened up myself, had my breakfast and scanned The Times of India for some time. Rested for three hours. Got up by 11:00. Vara Prasad, a cousin of Veeru, and I went to Film Nagar for shopping. We bought rice and vegetables in Trinetra Supermarket. I booked an envelope at the nearby DTDC courier point to be sent to a marriage consultancy in Visakhapatnam. This envelope contains the photos and biodata of my friend Veeranjaneyulu. We had our lunch by 2:30. Rested for two hours. Went to Film Nagar by 5:30 and spent browsing Internet for one hour. I sent messages to eight beautiful brides registered on shaadi.com website on behalf of Veeranjaneyulu. Returned to Veeru’s abode by 9:30 with a VCD of the Telugu feature film “Premalo Pavani Kalyan”. We could not watch the first half of this film due to some problem with the CD. The English feature film “Jungle” filled this void from 12:30 to 2:30. This film portrays the basic instincts of young men and women. Forest is the place where people can lead carefree lives in all respects thinking and behaving like beasts. Went to sleep by 3:00.

26 November (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Freshened up myself soon and reached Yousufguda Check Post by 7:00. Scanned The Times of India for half an hour. I saw two suitable job vacancies for me. Took an Uppal bound Metro Express bus by 7:30. Reached the hostel by 9:00. Readied three applications to send to three places. A Mumbai based consultancy wants “Customer Support Executive” to be placed in the Middle East; the Sherwood Public School in Hyderabad wants “English Teacher” and the airline of the United Arab Emirates wants “Cabin Crew”. Went to the post office in the Advanced Training Institute to post these envelopes. It was kept closed due to Ramadan. Went to Ameerpet by 12:30. Had a plate of vegetable biryani in a hotel there and then proceeded to the office of “Kalyani Ads”. I previously applied for the position of “Script Writer” in this office. They informed me to come for an interview today. The head of this ad agency was busy attending some other work. He told me to write scripts for three different occasions. They informed me to bring my previous writings, if any. Returned to the hostel by 3:30. Rested till 5:30. There is no progress in the case of the bounced cheque of M S Raju being dealt with by advocate C S N Raju. My father has a burden of two lakh rupees on his head imposed by me. My fate is against me. I remained a victim. Went to sleep by 10:00.

27 November (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Left for Ameerpet by 9:00. The fellow of the Kalyani Ads told me to bring my written works for assessment. I entered their office in “Eureka Court Complex” by 11:00. One fellow checked my creative works in Telugu. Sambha Siva Rao, the head of this ad agency, asked me about my expected salary. I wanted 5000 rupees. He told me to come down because I am a fresher. I said 3000 rupees. He told me that he would increase my salary by next April after assessing my efficiency in the assigned job. He finalized me. My position is “Office Assistant”. My primary duty is to edit the text part of the ads. I should carry out even other office related works. I agreed for it for the time being. Went out and had two samosas for my lunch. Spent talking with the office staff there for some time. He assigned me text copying work into record files from 3:00 to 5:00. He also told me to write scripts for four different occasions. I did it. I hated this hell. It ended there. On my way back, met advocate C S N Raju in his office at Khairatabad and enquired him about the progress in the cheque bounce case. Returned to the hostel by 7:30. Alluri Murali, Anjaneya Raju and I had our parcel of supper by 9:00. Went to sleep by 11:00.

28 November (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Last night I saw my goddess Lahari in my dream. I lost a heaven missing her as my friend. To see her in my dream is like going back into a sphere of sweet memories. I distanced myself from her some time during this time last year. I admired her. Now I am living a broken life. Went to State Bank of India near the University of Hyderabad by 10:30 and withdrew 300 rupees. There is minimum balance only in this account now. My financial level declined to the bottom. May God save me from this plight. Returned to the hostel by 12:00. Had five rupees of bananas for my lunch. Scanned Eenadu from 1:00 to 3:00. Spent talking with my hostel mates for half an hour. Posted an application by 4:00 for the position of “English Teacher” at Vignan Vidyalaya in Hyderabad. Went to an Internet café and spent there browsing Internet from 4:15 to 5:15. Checked the responses by brides on the shaadi.com website to the messages I previously sent them on behalf of Veeranjaneyulu. Two girls rejected him. Four girls are yet to respond. I applied for the position of “Sub Editor Trainee” to the English daily Deccan Chronicle by email. Evening ate jaggery. Had my share of the parcel of supper by 8:45 along with Murali and Anjaneya Raju. Night discussed English language with my hostel mates for some time. Went to sleep by 10:30.

29 November (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning spent in my hostel room simply lying down myself on my mat watching daydreams. Had my lunch by 2:30. Went to Global View Internet café down Shivam Road by 4:00 and spent there for one hour. Checked shaadi.com website and found the willingness of a girl to consider marrying Veeranjaneyulu. Started to Yousufguda Check Post by 6:00 by bus. Thence took an auto rickshaw and reached the abode of Veeranjaneyulu by 7:30. My thought follows, “Entertainment seems to be the focal point in the modern world. It has taken extreme dimensions these days. Commercialization began to darken progressive creativity and the value based society. Beauty contests for men and women are the latest craze for youth. Public display of body parts by fashionable women reflects the present trend of exhibitionism. Film industry, the main branch of the present entertainment scenario, is the chief contributor to the degradation of moral values. It is deeply influencing the lifestyles of men and women. Demonstration effect works here. Sensitive and sensible behavior is looking outdated to the modern youth. Simple and modest people look like nuts to crazy guys and girls. Daytime bike rides and nighttime bed enjoyments are the evils of the day”. Went to sleep by 11:30.

30 November (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent all the day within the abode of Veeru. Afternoon got a phone call from the folks of Bashyam School in Guntur. They informed me to come to Guntur to discuss the point of my appointment as an English teacher with them. They said that I need to undergo training as an English teacher in Guntur for one year. They pay me a montly stipend of 1200 rupees during this training period. They provide me with food and accommodation facilities. Evening went to a computer center in Film Nagar. Veeru saw the photo of a bride from New Delhi on shaadi.com website. She earlier expressed her interest to marry Veeru. He did not like her eyes. He said that girls with such eyes would have egoistic mentality and it becomes difficult to deal with such creatures after marriage. We returned to his abode by 11:00. The name of Lord Krishna follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Went to sleep by 12:00.

1 December (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Spent all the day casually within the hostel. Evening sent two postcards to the principal of Bhashyam Public School in Guntur informing him that I am not interested in joining their school as an English Teacher Trainee. Today it is “International Aids Day”. Sex is an inevitable part of human life. There are many reasons for why illegal and immoral sexual relations should take place between a boy and a girl or a man and woman. Film industry is the best example to this. Many actresses, after assuming star positions, start talking against the spread of this fatal disease. Actually they sleep with many directors and producers for getting chances in their films. Every rich man and woman, with a few exceptions, wishes to sleep with exciting and new partners. They follow safe measures. They simply advise the illiterate and the ignorant to take those precautionary measures like them in the film industry. It shows that sex is an evil temptation. Ordinary people can’t withstand its influence. There are many showy bachelors and spinsters in this world. Their purity can be assessed based on their ability to remain away from the attractions of sex. Having sex with a socially approved life partner is virtue. Some want to die early enjoying everything associated with unrestricted sex. They are all perverts. They live like animals before dying. Went to sleep by 10:30.

2 December (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Went to Bhashyam Public School at Vivekananda Nagar Colony in Kukatpally by 2:30. I gave them a Demonstration Class of English Teaching for half an hour. Finally I told them that I am not interested in teaching profession. Returned to the hostel by 4:30. Night listened to Telugu cine songs on my Walkman. My thought follows, “Modernity is a challenge to the unmarried youth. They love somebody in their teenage. It is enhanced by the advent of women into many spheres of public life. Every bond of love can’t reach the threshold of marriage. Arranged marriages impose many familial responsibilities. There is very little privacy to couples in smaller joint families. Nuclear families with unlimited wealth crave for new tastes. Commitment and reliability in conjugal relationships among affluent people can hardly be seen in the present freedom society. Only individuals with standards and values can lead satisfactory lives of togetherness for long. They are mostly poor and hard-working. They have little time to enjoy their lives. Among all these frustrated ones, only people of creativity and dreams can enjoy their lives well. People, leading mechanical lives, running after money can’t be good human beings. Idealists can see even a hellish world as a heavenly abode with their magic eyes and vision”. Went to sleep by 11:00.

3 December (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Had my breakfast by 8:00. Went to Arts College in Osmania University by 9:30. Thence walked to the nearby Head Post Office and enquired the concerning postman about the letter he refused to deliver yesterday at our hostel in my absence. He gave me an envelope which returned to me from Chennai. I previously applied for a job in Chennai. I did not affix adequate postal stamps on this envelope. So, they sent it back to me with a fine of ten rupees. I paid it and collected the envelope. Thence walked a bit ahead and took a city bus from Tarnaka to Secunderabad. Thence walked much and reached Swapna Lok Complex by 11:00. Today there are interviews at Sharp Human Resources for the position of “Cleaning Supervisor” in Dubai. That nasty scoundrel said that the monthly salary for this position is 6500 rupees. One has to daily involve oneself in this cleaning work for ten hours. I cursed my fate which prompted me to attend such filthy interview. Returned to the hostel by 12:30. Afternoon had my lunch for five rupees sharing a parcel of full meal with my hostel mates. Evening went to the nearby Osmania University campus and spent some time talking with my hostel mate Murali, sitting in a lawn. Returned to the hostel by 7:00. Night talked with my hostel mates for some time. Went to sleep by 10:00.

4 December (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning washed a pair of clothes. Started to Jubilee Hills by 12:00. Reached the abode of Veeranjaneyulu by 1:30. We had our lunch by 2:00. Evening spent talking with my friends there. By 8:30 talked with advocate C S N Raju using the cellular phone of Veeru. He informed me that M S Raju agreed to pay back my due money very soon. I felt happy. Informed the same to my brother Sambha at home. They felt relieved from the month-long tension. Night, Murali, one of the close friends of Veeru, a devoted follower of Meher Baba, talked about the spiritual legacy of the universal order of divine incarnations and five sadhgurus. This visible world is like a speck in the omnipresent supremacy of soul. In every age, five sadhgurus manage the functioning of this universe. They influence even the ordinary lives of people. They know about the past, present and future of this world. Seven thousand angels carry out their assigned duties across the universe under the supervision of these five masters. Every living being has a destined role to play in this world. Every action of a creature is predestined. Nothing happens beyond one’s Karmic Cycle. The misguided self of a creature trusts and celebrates the untruth of this shadowy world. Self-realization and detachment from the worldly entanglements must be the goals of a human being for attaining salvation. I felt very happy listening to his spiritual discourse on human life. Went to sleep by 12:00.

5 December (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning scanned today’s dailies. In the assembly elections held recently in four northern states namely Delhi, Madhya Pradesh, Chhattisgarh and Rajasthan, Bharatiya Janata Party won in three states. It seems to be good news for me. Presently there is an unprecedented attack of other religions on mainstream Hinduism in India. Hinduism means a tradition of respect and love for other religions. Such religion of the highest spiritual standards is now being mocked at by other commercial and horrific religious cults in the world. Strategic Christians aim at spreading their religion across the world investing huge money and resources. Islamic fundamentalists create terror in their chosen places in the name of holy war ruining the lives of the helpless in the process. Hinduism must withstand these fierce winds of the world order and assert itself to establish peace and harmony in this tense world. The success of the BJP in these three states can help a bit in this direction. Went to an Internet café in Film Nagar by 11:00 and checked shaadi.com website. Found a suitable bride for Veeru. Evening borrowed 500 rupees from my friend Yoganand to meet my present expenses. Took a city bus at Yousufguda Check Post and returned to the hostel by 6:15. Night shared a parcel of supper with my hostel mates. Night listened to radio and cine songs on my Walkman. Went to sleep by 10:30.

6 December (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. Had my breakfast by 8:00. Left for Khairatabad by 9:00 by a city bus. Reached the office of Cyberabad Legal Services by 10:00. Advocate C S N Raju contacted M S Raju over phone regarding the clearance of his bounced cheque. The latter told the prior to send me to his office by 3:00 today to collect the money. The advocate sent his office assistant along with me to the office of M S Raju in Secunderabad. We had our lunch at Tirumala Mess in Khairatabad. Took a city bus and reached the office of M S Raju by 2:00. He came to his office by 3:30. He took the bounced cheque from me and issued a new cheque for 90,000 rupees to be encashed at Global Trust Bank in Habsiguda. He sent one of his office boys along with us to that bank. We hired an auto rickshaw at Rethifile Bus Stand and moved to Street No. 6 in Habsiguda. I paid 26 rupees for this travel. We went into the bank and got the cheque encashed. I gave 1500 rupees to the office assistant of the advocate. It is the service fee the advocate charged. We returned to Secunderabad by a city bus. Thence I returned to the hostel. This money deeply influenced my brain for one month. Night reached this happy news to my folks at home over phone. Had my supper by 8:30 along with my hostel mates. Went to sleep by 10:00. Night had a pleasant dream.

7 December (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning spent reading newspapers and listening to radio. From 11:00 to 12:00 listened to the Telugu feature film “Saagara Sangamam” on Hyderabad radio. It is one of the best films I like watching. Spent casually in the afternoon. By 4:00 left for NTR Gardens by Hussain Sagar along with my hostel mates. We took some photos with the camera of Hemanth. By 7:30 we started walking along the road around Hussain Sagar toward Sundarayya Park. I observed beautiful couples on the way. I regretted my lonely life in this city. The refreshing ambience ridiculed my life of bachelorhood. I enjoyed the breezes blowing from the lake. By 9:30 we took metro train at Sundarayya Park station and got off it at Begumpet station. I liked the beautiful compartments in this train. We went into Life Style Showroom. I wondered at the prices of items in this store and the rich and stylish customers moving therein. It is a choice of the rich. My hostel mates did a little shopping in it. We walked a bit from there and waited at a bus stop for a city bus. We reached Rethifile Bus Stand by 10:30. Thence we hired an auto rickshaw and reached our hostel by 11:00. I did not have my supper. Went to sleep by 11:30.

8 December (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Had my breakfast by 8:00. Spent reading a newspaper for one hour. Went to the State Bank of India at Amberpet by 10:00. I wanted to get a Demand Draft for 86,000 rupees to send to my brother Srinivas to be encashed by him there. The teller advised me to know the bank account number of my brother so that the money can be transferred to his account immediately. Came out and called up home. My mother picked up the telephone and said that my brother Srinivas and sister-in-law Sandhya Rani are in Mallavaram. I rang up Mallavaram. My sister-in-law does not know her husband’s bank account number. Then my brother was not there. I felt frustrated. Gave up these efforts and went back to the bank. Found it closed. A strike is being observed by the activists of Bharatiya Janata Party protesting against the recent violent killings at Old Basthi in Hyderabad on the Commemoration Day of “Babri Masjid Demolition Day”. All the shops were kept closed. Buses were not run till 2:00. I returned to the hostel being disturbed by these prevailing conditions around me. Got the bank account number of my brother Srinivas by 2:30 from my sister-in-law Sandhya Rani over telephone. Evening spent some time sitting by road in the Osmania University campus opposite the Engineering College and returned to the hostel by 5:30. By 6:00 I got a phone call from Rama Rao of ICFAI University at Nagarjuna Hills in Hyderabad. He informed me that I can collect my appointment letter for the position of Sub Editor tomorrow, if possible. I felt very happy at this news. Thanks to Lord Krishna. I celebrated it having a plate meal in Shanti Deluxe Hotel down Shivam Road and a bit of jaggery. Went to sleep by 11:00.

9 December (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Got ready soon and went to the State Bank of India at Amberpet. Deposited 86,000 rupees to be sent to my brother’s bank account at Elamanchili through Telegraphic Money Transfer. Reached Flat No. 62 at Nagarjuna Hills in Panjagutta by 10:30. Collected my appointment letter from the HR staff of ICFAI University for the position of Sub Editor with its publications division. It is a contract of two years during which they pay me an honorarium of 8000 rupees per month. I am satisfied with this job. Thence left for the abode of Veeranjaneyulu in Jubilee Hills. From there walked to Jubilee Hills Public School to meet my friend Yoganand. Returned him 500 rupees which I previously borrowed from him. Had two samosas at a small hotel along with him in Film Nagar. Returned to the hostel by 3:30. Afternoon informed my mother and brother Srinivas about my job, using the cellular phone of Veeru. Evening wrote an acknowledgement letter to give to the Associate Editor there to whom I must report before joining the job tomorrow. Got it printed on a laser printer at a computer center by 8:00. Night had a plate of chicken noodles at the fast food handcart opposite Srirang Hospital. Went to sleep by 11:00.

10 December (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Got ready soon and left for Panjagutta by 8:00 by a city bus. Got off it at Panjagutta Crossroads and walked to the Flat No. 62 of ICFAI University at Nagarjuna Hills. Went up into its fifth floor and waited for the HR staff to come. They told me to fill in an HDFC Bank form and some other related ones as part of the formalities to be carried out by them on the occasion of the joining report of a candidate into their organization as an employee. They assigned me the position of Sub Editor at ICFAI Press. They told me to meet Associate Editor Ch Rajeshwar in that office. I walked down to Dwarakapuri Colony and met the aforementioned and the Administrative Officer Manjunath Bhat in Flat No. 8. They asked me to fill in some details on a form for the purpose of issuance of an Identity Card for me. Then Pratima took me to the first floor in the opposite Flat No. 11 and introduced me to Annies, the coordinator of the editorial staff in this floor. Annies formally introduced me to the editorial staff there and instructed me to sit with Sub Editor Ravindra Varma to understand the nature of work there. I spent going through a manual of editing symbols and some journals of this press. Had my lunch by 1:00 in a nearby hotel. Left the office by 5:00. Reached our hostel by 6:00. My first day job experience is somewhat mixed. Went to sleep by 11:00.

11 December (Thursday)

Woke up by 6:00. Got ready soon and left for Panjagutta by 7:20 by a city bus. Reached there by 8:00. Had my breakfast at a roadside pushcart. Had two bananas also. Went to ICFAI Press by 8:20. Scanned today’s English dailies for some time. Punched my attendance card and entered the office. Met Annies and asked her to assign me some piece of work. She kept me sitting in my seat till 10:30. Then she gave me some material downloaded from the Internet. There are instructions to be followed in editing. She told me to go through it and learn editing skills. I read it till 12:30. By 1:10 went to the nearby Abhiruchi Hotel to have my lunch. Had a plate of Lemon Rice. Sat with Sub Editor Chandra Sekhar from 2:30 to 5:00 talking about the nuances of editing profession. Took a city bus and reached the hostel by 7:00. Had my supper by 7:45 along with my hostel mates. Talked with my brother Sambha and my father over telephone from 8:30 to 8:45. I am worried at their burden of debt of one lakh rupees caused by me. Went to sleep by 10:30.

12 December (Friday)

Woke up by 5:30. Got ready soon and reached Panjagutta by 8:30 by a city bus. Had my breakfast by 8:50 and then proceeded to my workplace. Even today I was not assigned any editing work. I played with Internet for some time. During the latter part of the morning hours, sent an email to my friend Colin. He is presently at his home in Bangalore. I was touched by the event of sending him an email recollecting the happy days we spent in the campus of University of Hyderabad. Had a plate of vegetable biryani in Abhiruchi Hotel by 2:00. Spent rest of the afternoon typing out a letter on computer addressing my teacher uncle Venkata Rama Raju explaining him the recent developments in my life. Left the office by 5:00 and took a city bus by 5:20. Reached the hostel by 6:30. Went to Global View Internet café and got my letter to my teacher uncle printed on a laser printer. Got one more copy of the same letter printed out in another Internet café. Went to Avinash Audio and Video Center by Shivam Road and bought an audio cassette of the songs of the Telugu feature film “Sorry… Naaku Pellaindhi”. My friend Lahari played the role of a heroine in it. There is a decent photo of her on the cover of this audio cassette. Had my supper along with my hostel mates by 9:30. Went to sleep by 10:30.

13 December (Saturday)

Woke up by 5:30. It is a holiday to our office today. Washed a pair of clothes and had my breakfast by 8:00. Bought Eenadu and Deccan Chronicle and scanned them for some time. By 9:00 went to the State Bank of India at Amberpet. Bought a Demand Draft for 265 rupees in favor of India Today at New Delhi towards one year subscription for its Telugu edition. My brother Sambha receives it in Peda Gummuluru for one year. My friend Trinath recently bought a cellular phone of Reliance Company. He got a booklet along with it. It carries the discount coupons of many companies in India. India Today too issued its discount coupon in it which can be used to subscribe to its publications. I took that discount coupon from my friend recently. I am making use of that special offer through this annual subscription. Returned to the post office in the Advanced Training Institute (ATI) and posted the envelope to its New Delhi address. Posted even the letter to my teacher uncle. Returned to the hostel by 11:00. Spent rest of the day within the hostel. Listened to Telugu cine songs on radio for some time and read today’s dailies for some time. Afternoon I gave a small party to my hostel mates celebrating the occasion of my getting a job. I gave them 100 rupees. They bought chicken pieces from a hotel with it. I too had a small piece of it. Night a hot debate took place among us hostel mates on the merits of Chandrababu Naidu, the present Chief Minister of Andhra Pradesh. It was cold outside. Went to sleep by 12:30.

14 December (Sunday)

Woke up by 5:30. Morning spent listening to radio and reading dailies. Had my lunch by 1:30. Rested for some time. From 3:00 to 4:00 listened to the famous Telugu play “N.G.O.” on Hyderabad radio. Acharya Athreya wrote it. It is a great play. It presents that even people with great values can’t help falling prey to corruption at times. Their poverty makes them so. It throws them into more difficulties. Even then they need to struggle to live somehow. God gave us this human life. One should live it despite ordeals on the way. It deeply touched me. I saw my life in it. My dreamy age kept me growing. I am tired of living in this world of love and imaginations. I get money from my present job but not peace of mind. Only my wife can give it to me. I have to run fast along with the changes of time. My parents and brothers are away from me. I don’t want to marry in the present situation. I can’t look after my wife with this salary. I dreamt to foster her like a bud. I wanted to please her with the comforts of life and the happiness of coexistence. My folks are leading poor lives. Once I marry, I will be distanced from them due to the pressures of my married life. Birth and death are the hell to the man on earth. I don’t want to live but I can’t die because it is a spiritual crime. I came into this world to fulfill some responsibilities assigned by God. He does not forgive me if I end this life in the middle of the scheduled journey. Today I spent a gloomy day. Went to sleep by 11:00.

15 December (Monday)

Woke up by 5:30. Got ready soon and went to the bus stop opposite Srirang Hospital by 7:30. Took a city bus and reached Panjagutta by 8:15. Went to Abhiruchi Hotel and had a plate of Upma. Moved to ICFAI Press and scanned today’s English dailies for 20 minutes. Entered our floor by 9:00. Morning spent scanning some websites. Had my lunch by 1:30 in Abhiruchi Hotel. Returned to my seat fast and spent browsing Internet till 3:00. This morning, Dakshayani, one of my seniors in my M.A. English course, too joined us as a Sub Editor. She did not remember me. I remember my seniors and juniors. We spent talking happily for 10 minutes. Annies did not assign any editing work to her today. From 3:00 to 5:00 I edited a text given by my colleague Ravindra Varma. I felt very happy to carry out this work. Left the office by 5:00. Came to the bus stop opposite NIMS. Took a city bus by 5:15 and reached our hostel by 6:00. Today the sky was flooded with clouds due to the cyclonic effect over the Bay of Bengal by Chennai. It is said that it would severely affect the regions in the southern coastal Andhra Pradesh. The chill is thrilling. Night had my supper along with my hostel mates. Went to sleep by 11:00.

16 December (Tuesday)

Woke up by 5:30. Got ready by 7:15 and moved to the bus stop. Reached NIMS bus stop by 8:00. Went to Abhiruchi Hotel and had a plate of Plain Dosa. Reached ICFAI Press by 8:30. Scanned today’s English dailies for half an hour. Morning carried out the editing of two texts given by Chandra Sekhar, one of my colleagues. Spent browsing Internet for some time. Went to Shanbagh Hotel by 1:30 along with my colleagues. Food items are very few there and comparatively costly. I came out and proceeded to Abhiruchi Hotel. Had a plate of Lemon Rice. Went back to the office by 2:00. Edited two texts given by Ravindra Varma. Browsed telugumatrimony.com website for some time. I created my bridegroom profile on this website out of curiosity. Left the office by 5:00. Took a city bus by 5:15 and reached the hostel by 6:10. Took my pair of clothes, which I washed this morning, to a nearby washerman for ironing. On the way, went to a telephone booth and called up advocate C S N Raju. Enquired him about the progress of the cheating case against M S Raju (we previously planned to get some more money from him threatening him with a cheating case). He said he sent a legal notice to him. Some answer can be expected in a week’s time. Night listened to Telugu cine songs on my Walkman. Went to sleep by 11:00.

17 December (Wednesday)

Woke up by 5:45. Got ready by 6:45. Listened to the regional news in Telugu on Hyderabad radio. Stepped out by 7:10. Took a city bus and reached NIMS bus stop by 7:45. This morning a blanket of fog covered the twin cities. I saw its thick layer on Hussain Sagar Lake when I was travelling by bus. Had my breakfast in Abhiruchi Hotel and reached ICFAI Press by 8:10. Scanned today’s dailies for half an hour. Morning my colleague assigned me a little editing work. Spent rest of the day browsing Internet. I checked information on Australia, the Maldives, Canada and the United States. Then I concentrated much on website “daijob.com” for Japan based jobs. I created my profile on it in the given format and sent a few responses to some recruiting agencies. Took a city bus and reached the hostel by 6:30. Went to a nearby fast food eatery and had a plate of vegetable noodles for 11 rupees. My hostel mate gave me an envelope carrying the chequebook of HDFC Bank, its international debit card and some other related papers. I felt happy for assuming such status by the courtesy of ICFAI Press. Night listened to Hyderabad radio for some time. Went to sleep by 10:30. 

18 December (Thursday)

Woke up by 5:30. Got ready and went to the bus stop by 7:15. Reached NIMS bus stop by 8:00. Went to Abhiruchi Hotel and had a plate of Upma. Today I carried out a good amount of editing work assigned to me by my colleagues. Scanned some websites for some time. I wonder at the privilege of access to Internet being an employee with ICFAI Press. When I lived for two academic years in the campus of University of Hyderabad, I never utilized those facilities like my classmates. I learnt sending emails and browsing Internet very recently. It provides me with a sense of belongingness to somebody else beyond the realm of my limited contacts with my familiar ones. Returned to the hostel by 6:00. This evening, when I was checking my email, I saw a message from one of the members of telugumatrimony.com website. I tried to contact that person. The necessary details were not there. So, I failed in it. I felt happy to know that at least one creature tried to contact me. I felt worried for being unable to contact her immediately. It is a matter of joy to belong to others in some way despite solitude on our part as an individual. Night washed a pair of clothes. Spent talking with my hostel mates for a long time. Went to sleep by 11:00.

19 December (Friday)

Woke up by 6:15. Got ready soon and went to the bus stop by 7:10. Took a city bus by 7:20 and reached NIMS bus stop by 7:50. Went to Abhiruchi Hotel and had a plate of idlies. Reached ICFAI Press by 8:10. Scanned today’s dailies for half an hour. Took my seat by 8:40. Spent browsing Internet for some time. Today I edited very interesting content for more than four hours. Returned to the hostel by 6:00. Talked with my mother, two brothers and my sister-in-law Sandhya Rani from 7:00 to 7:10 using the cellular phone of one of my hostel mates. They said that the stinking dog M S Raju intimated them over phone that he would deal with me very seriously because I got a legal notice served to him by advocate C S N Raju demanding compensation for his fraud against me. They are tense over my safety in the city against the threat of this filthy pig. I assured them that I would withdraw myself from this demand immediately. Conversely, I wrote a very serious letter (containing two pages) to send to this bastard. I decided to consult advocate C S N Raju and react effectively in this respect. My brothers and mother told me that they are looking for a bride for me and that I should be ready to marry within days if possible. I agreed for it. May God bring a good life partner for me. Went to sleep by 11:00. 

20 December (Saturday)

Woke up by 6:00. Got ready soon and stepped out by 6:45. Took a city bus by 7:00 and got off it at Khairatabad. Went to the office of advocate C S N Raju. Gave my serious letter written addressing M S Raju to his office assistant for a check by this advocate. C S N Raju felt a little frustrated when I talked with him over phone because it is too early to do it after sending a legal notice to him. Took a city bus and reached NIMS bus stop by 7:40. Had my breakfast in Abhiruchi Hotel and moved to the office. Scanned today’s dailies for half an hour. Took my seat by 8:30. Browsed Internet for half an hour. Did editing for two hours. Then prepared my brief profile to send to my brother Srinivas to allow them to show it to the people of a bride. Had a plate of Chapati in Abhiruchi Hotel by 1:30. Afternoon edited a little content assigned by my colleague. Left the office by 5:10. Took a city bus from NIMS bus stop to Yousufguda Check Post. Thence took an auto rickshaw and reached the abode of Veeranjaneyulu by 7:00. Night we watched the classic Telugu feature film “Saagara Sangamam” on the computer of Veeru. Recently he bought this used computer from an assistant director working with Telugu film director Krishna Vamsy. Spent talking with friends for one hour. They are many here. Went to sleep by 10:30.

21 December (Sunday)

Woke up by 6:30. Spent in the abode of Veeru till 3:00. Watched the Telugu feature films “Swaathi Muthyam” and “Khadgam” on his computer. By 5:00 returned to our hostel. Evening got an envelope ready with my color photo and matrimonial details to send to my brother Srinivas. My folks are searching for a bride for me. They told me to send it to them. Washed a pair of clothes by 7:00. By 8:30 had parcel meal along with my hostel mates. The name of Lord Krishna follows. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare, Hare Krishna Hare Krishna Krishna Krishna Hare Hare. Night listened to radio. Went to sleep by 10:30.

22 December (Monday)

Woke up by 6:00. Got ready soon and went to the bus stop opposite Srirang Hospital by 7:30. Took a city bus and reached NIMS bus stop by 8:00. Went to Abhiruchi Hotel and had a plate of Upma. Reached the office by 8:30. Scanned today’s dailies for some time. Morning carried out a little editing work. Afternoon went to Bali Photo Studio to get my color photo taken. The woman at the desk commented that a color photo does not come well when one is in black and white clothes. I appreciated her honesty inwardly. She told me that shooting, developing and printing a color photo costs 120 rupees. It is beyond my reach now. There is no even one good color photo of mine. Photographs represent the lost heaven of a person. Looking at them, one can recollect the moments of forgotten history. To have a photograph of a relative or God with us is like staying with them. Paintings reflect the history of an art form and photographs remind us of lost time. Returned to the hostel by 6:00. This evening I received an envelope from the HDFC Bank containing some forms. Noted down the important details of my HDFC Bank account and got them printed out on a sheet of paper in a computer centre. Night had a plate of chicken fried rice for 15 rupees at the fast food eatery opposite Srirang Hospital. Spent talking with my hostel mates for some time. It was cold outside. Went to sleep by 11:00.  

23 December (Tuesday)

Woke up by 6:00. Morning washed a pair of clothes. Took a city bus by 7:15. Had my breakfast in Abhiruchi Hotel by 8:10. Scanned today’s dailies for 20 minutes. Carried out a little editing work and then browsed Internet for some time. This morning I did not have the coffee which would be served every day to us in our office. It is causing a bit of giddiness to me and so avoided it. Returned to the hostel by 6:00. Ate something by 7:30. Last night I slept in the Room No. F 7 opposite mine along with my hostel mate. My Room F 1 turns very cold at night despite tight closure of all the windows and door. Last night Lahari and her brother Vijaya Krishna visited me in my dream. Its essence is symbolic rather than realistic. It signifies that she is not well. May God look after her like a kid forgiving her childlike mentality and short-sightedness. I wish her a happy life. Night listened to Telugu cine songs on my Walkman. I am presently alone in my room. I feel lucky for it. I invited my hostel mate Anjaneya Raju to sleep in my room. Went to sleep by 9:30. 

24 December (Wednesday)

Woke up by 6:00. Got ready soon and went to the bus stop by 7:15. Took a city bus and reached NIMS bus stop by 7:45. Had a plate of puris in a hotel and went to our office by 8:00. Scanned today’s dailies for half an hour. Took my seat by 8:35. Today I edited a 20-page article assigned by Ravindra Varma. Afternoon spent most of my time typing out an essay titled “Indian Marriage system-A Personal Point of View” on my computer. This exercise is meant for enhancing my writing skills. Creativity needs to be expressed in some medium. Afternoon our coordinator Annies distributed a few pieces of cake in our floor on the eve of Christmas. She is from Kerala. She is said to be already married but looks contrary to it. She distributes work to proofreaders and sub editors and ensures that the processed files are reached to the printing press within scheduled timings. She looks like a child to me in terms of her mentality and behavior toward us in the office. She wears a pleasing smile on her childlike face. She is a modern girl representing a liberal lifestyle. Returned to the hostel by 6:00. Night had a plate of vegetable noodles at a nearby eatery. Listened to Hyderabad radio for some time. Went to sleep by 11:00. 

25 December (Thursday)

Woke up by 6:30. Today our office observes a holiday on the occasion of Christmas. I spent all the time within the hostel. Morning washed a pair of clothes and put them on terrace. It was cloudy. It started drizzling by the time I came back from the eatery after my breakfast. There is low pressure over the Bay of Bengal. These days going out means spending money. Financially I am not competent now. So, opted for staying back in the hostel throughout. Morning listened to Telugu cine songs on my Walkman. Had my lunch along with Anjaneya Raju by 1:45. Spent most of my time talking with my hostel mates. There are about 10 folks now. Many of them are doing their postgraduate courses. Their dream is to get a good job soon. It is the vital qualification to marry a girl in our region now. They want a girl to love and to be loved by as per the customs of society. They are all desperately waiting to be married. The potential threats to the present youth are getting married soon and then staying together for long after marriage. Financial stability and security are essential to meet these two things. Unemployment is the hard game out there. Night listened to songs and a Telugu play on Hyderabad radio. Went to sleep by 10:30.

26 December (Friday)

Woke up by 6:00. Got ready soon and went to the bus stop by 7:15. Today I carried out a little editing work and then spent browsing Internet. Returned to the hostel by 6:00. Today it is very cold due to absence of sunshine because there is low pressure over the Bay of Bengal. I am unable to sleep well for the last 20 days. I am covering every nook and corner of my room with some available stuff. Yet the mischievous and tricky cold is entering my room to keep on tickling me throughout the night. Cold in winter is a feature of nature. The elements of nature venture to please all the creatures on earth without exceptions. I like to cover my body with a light bed sheet in all the seasons. It looks delicate and helpless in augmenting heat inside fighting against the intelligent and strong winds outside in winter. I can’t find even one night without a dream. This segment of my subconscious entertainment is getting threatened by the onslaught of these freezing breezes of the season. Night had my supper along with my hostel mates. In winter, supper can’t be tastier unless there is a tender palm to feed. Only a possessive and sensitive wife can make a man’s life enjoyable. Night spent talking with my hostel mates for a long time. Went to sleep by 12:00.

27 December (Saturday)

Woke up by 6:00. Got ready soon and went to the bus stop by 7:15. Had a Dosa at a roadside eatery near NIMS. I regretted it. There is not even a plate to place the stuff on. They put it on a dry leaf. One has to handle it like an infant. I thought of being helpful to the ordinary people of the society eating at these places but my tongue did not agree with me. Reached the office by 8:20. Scanned today’s dailies for 20 minutes. Thousands of people were buried under the debris of a severe earthquake that rocked Iran in the early hours yesterday. It is a warning by enraged nature. There won’t be future to humanity unless they stop their sinful deeds and explorations digging deep into the stomach of mother earth. Today I carried out a little editing work. Came back to the hostel by 6:30. My hostel mates narrated me the account of a theft that occurred in our hostel this morning by 9:00. A young fellow took away the cellular phone charger of one of our hostel mates proving our hostel supervisor and Anjaneya Raju as fools. He managed to convince these two creatures that he was taking that piece for the supposed fellow on his request. I am lucky that my Walkman was not taken away which I kept easily accessible to anybody. Went to sleep by 11:30.

28 December (Sunday)

Woke up by 6:30. By 8:00 bought a copy of Eenadu. Spent reading it for some time. They gave a notice inviting stories in Telugu to publish in their Sunday supplement. It is a contest. I wanted to write the story of my failure to go to Alaska. I don’t like to delay in anything. Wrote the story from 10:00 to 11:00. I entitled it “Paapam Kalavara Rao”. Went down Shivam Road by 11:30 to get it typed up and printed in a computer center. Nothing was kept open because it is a Sunday. Brought a parcel of lunch from a hotel by 12:00. Stepped out by 12:30 after having my lunch. Bought a 2004 diary for 70 rupees at a shop. It is made by the Eagle Press. Thence moved to a computer centre and got my essay “Indian Marriage System-My Personal Point of View” printed out. Thereafter walked toward Vidya Nagar railway station. Thence walked toward Quarantine Junction via Shankar Math. Got my story in Telugu typed up and printed out at Venu Graphics there. Returned to the hostel by 4:00. Had my haircut by 5:30 in a salon by road near Shivam Temple. By 6:30 washed a pair of clothes and Took a head bath. Had my parcel meal by 8:30. Listened to Hyderabad radio and Telugu cine songs on my Walkman till 10:00. Went to sleep by 10:30.

29 December (Monday)

Woke up by 6:20. Got ready soon and went to the bus stop by 7:20. Reached NIMS bus stop by 8:20. Had a plate of idlies in Abhiruchi Hotel and went to our office. Scanned today’s dailies for some time. Took my seat by 8:40. Morning I did editing for two hours. Afternoon bought five one-rupee postal stamps for six rupees at a shop and affixed them on the envelope to send to the office of Telugu daily Eenadu at Somajiguda. I sent my Telugu short story “Paapam Kalavara Rao” as my entry to its recently announced “Sunday Supplement Story Contest”. This story presents the account of my “Alaska Debacle”. Had a plate of vegetable biryani in Abhiruchi Hotel. Afternoon spent most of my time typing out the remaining part of my recently started essay “Culture Debate”. Returned to the hostel by 6:20. Knew that the consultant, to whom I previously sent an application for the position of “Customer Service Executive”, called up from Mumbai. He wants me to attend an interview at Nehru Road in Bangalore on the 2nd of next month. This job is in the Middle East and a free recruitment. Night had a plate of vegetable fried rice. Went to sleep by 10:30.

30 December (Tuesday)

Woke up by 6:20. Got ready soon and went to the bus stop by 7:15. Reached NIMS bus stop by 8:00. Had my breakfast by 8:20 and proceeded to the office. Scanned today’s dailies for ten minutes. Sent two emails to two different addresses. One email was to the Mumbai based consultancy seeking clarification regarding the ensuing interview in Bangalore and the other one was to “Ananth Technologies Limited” applying for the position of “Customer Relations Manager” for its international transactions. The latter is at Jubilee Hills in Hyderabad. Today I did a good amount of editing work. I edited two three-page articles and one 40-page article in five hours’ time. Typed out the remaining part of the second page of the essay “Culture Debate” for some time. This essay should occupy the space of three A 4 size papers. Returned to the hostel by 6:00. Had two buns for six rupees in the nearby Hilton Café for my supper. Night washed a pair of clothes. Spent talking with my hostel mates for half an hour. Listened to Telugu cine songs and a “Hari Katha” on Hyderabad radio. I regret the journey of this year into past soon. Went to sleep by 11:10 for my dreams.

31 December (Wednesday)

Woke up by 6:20. Got ready soon and went to the bus stop by 7:15. Took a city bus and reached NIMS bus stop by 8:00. Had my breakfast by 8:15 and proceeded to the office. Scanned today’s dailies for some time and then moved to my seat of work. Today I did editing for two hours and spent rest of the time completing the remaining part of the essay “Culture Debate”. Came back to the hostel by 6:30. This evening I had only ten rupees left on me. Went to the HDFC ATM Center near Shivam Temple and checked if my salary was credited to my account. It was not yet credited. Walked down Shivam Road and bought a pack of Britannia Tiger biscuits for four rupees and bananas for three rupees for my last supper in this year. Returned to the hostel by 7:30. My hostel mates were planning to celebrate the advent of New Year. The pity was that their budgets were hardly enough to meet the demands of this occasion. However, one fellow managed to buy a big bottle of Coca Cola. I too tasted a bit of this soft drink on their request. I spent listening to Telugu cine songs till 11:00. It is my style of seeing off 2003 and inviting 2004. It has been a year of character testing and building in my life. Went to sleep by 11:30 by the grace of God.

© 2011 Datla Chiranjeevi Raju

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